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I've lost my focus.

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  • I've lost my focus.

    Not just at work either.

    My emploers treat me well, i'm well paid, i have an incredibly secure job in the current economy. (Ironically my job becomes less secure when the economy does well)

    I have my own house (rented but mine) and i'm making ends meet with a little left over to treat myself. And last but by no means least, i've just paid the last installment of all my debts...

    And now i feel lost, I've been working so hard towards paying off this debt and it's been my sole focus for so long that now its gone i don't know what to do.

    I also feel stuck, i'm working what ammounts to an unskilled admin job, but i have a degree that i'm not putting to any use.

    I don't want to go to work, i thought i was just burned out and took a couple of days off to recuperate, but i don't feel any better. Mostly i want to sleep, eat and cry.

    [/pity party]

    Sorry about that, i just needed a small vent.

  • #2
    *blink blink* Are we the same person? I finally paid off my debts last year and have been considering quitting my p/t retail job. Working two jobs stinks and I'm getting pretty burned out. At the same time, I've had some car maintenance issues and vet bills this past year that made things pretty expensive and I'm grateful for the 2nd job. My primary job is in manufacturing. Although I feel pretty confident about still having a job come 2010, our company did have a furlough and we've been decreasing hours through most of the year. I want to quit the second job, yet I'm grateful for it because nobody knows what the upcoming few months will bring.

    Point is, I have no answers for you. I've started using some of my vacation time a day or two at a time, when I don't have to be at either job. Sadly, I sleep most of that time. I'm serious when I say I'm burned out. Yet I feel much better after some time off.

    Getting some time away and putting yourself in a different environment might be what you need. Sometimes going out and doing things, even mundane things, are very relaxing. Being cooped up at home can be stressful, believe it or not.
    A lion however, will only devour your corpse, whereas an SC is not sated until they have destroyed your soul. (Quote per infinitemonkies)

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    • #3
      To put it simply, you both need new goals.

      You basically killed yourselves to achieve that goal and now that you have, you're not sure what's next. In the back of your mind, you might be asking yourself "Why am I still doing this?"

      Now that you can afford to be happy, take the time to figure out what it is that will make you happy. Want to learn how to do something? Travel? Buy a new car? A house?

      My point is, treat yourself for a change. You've earned it.

      CH
      Some People Are Alive Only Because It Is Illegal To Kill Them

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      • #4
        Do you have hobbies? One you would have liked to pursue more but didn't have time for? Focus on that for a bit...and maybe volunteer somewhere you consider important.
        https://www.youtube.com/user/HedgeTV
        Great YouTube channel check it out!

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        • #5
          I'm with Crash and TelecomG - Find something new as a hobbie, in my case I do model crafts, and set goals like "Make this by.." or "Paint this by... "
          Now you've paid your debts, you'll have that little extra money, maybe start a new thing? Maybe save up for a big holiday?
          "On a scale of 1 to banana, whats your favourite colour of the alphabet?"
          Regards, Lord Baron Darth von Vaderham, esq. Middle brother to mharbourgirl & Squeaksmyalias

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          • #6
            Build up some funds for a decent retirement. Alternatively, funds for your own house. A huge deposit opens the eyes of prospective lenders.

            Even better, you could save right up and take me out to lunch!

            Rapscallion

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            • #7
              As Raps said, New Goal: Nest Egg!

              I was able to pay cash for a 1 year old truck, and put a sizable down payment on a new home with acreage, plus had $15K left over for emergencies before I gave up my third job. I kept the second job for the insurance benefits.
              Everything will be ok in the end. If it's not ok, it's not the end.

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              • #8
                Quoth Primer View Post
                As Raps said, New Goal: Nest Egg!
                Psst - you could have mentioned the lunch part as well!

                More seriously, you can look at saving up for other things than nest egg as well. I'm talking holidays - a week or two in another country just exploring is good. I went around Italy recently with a chum. He wants to drag me to Thailand at some point as well, and he's booked me on a plane to Barcelona for two nights in a couple of months (doubt I can afford to go, but...).

                You're young (assuming - I just get that impression). You have a fair amount of time to spend enjoying yourself. Be prepared to do that.

                Rapscallion

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                • #9
                  Everyone here is right. Do some soul searching and find out what you TRULY like to do. What makes you smile. (besides achieving one hell of a goal!!) I really like baking. Because, well, I have an evil sweet tooth, and I like concocting things in the kitchen, and having guinea pigs to try it out! I feel better tossing a batch of Ick Brownies out versus a Dead Pot Roast. (I'd probably try to eat Dead Roast somehow.) I like to give my baking stuff away and see the "little boy face" on some of my guy co workers (and my honey). It's just...smiley.

                  So, what do you like? Besides baking, I like travel. And that's not cheap.

                  In my mindset, I'm willing to stop, smell roses, wiggle toes in sand and enjoy myself between hard working goals. Are you? Or are you the kind to set goal and work endlessly towards it, without stopping someplace to smile a bit? Cuz my travel goal may not be as easy to reach if I smell the roses often, but to keep sane, I have to smell the roses.

                  Currently my goals are to pay down debts quickly and as much as possible. And get ready for the Babynoob who's coming soon. After that, it's house (in 3 to 5 years) and garden.

                  Cutenoob
                  In my heart, in my soul, I'm a woman for rock & roll.
                  She's as fast as slugs on barbituates.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Quoth Rapscallion View Post
                    More seriously, you can look at saving up for other things than nest egg as well. I'm talking holidays - a week or two in another country just exploring is good. I went around Italy recently with a chum. He wants to drag me to Thailand at some point as well, and he's booked me on a plane to Barcelona for two nights in a couple of months (doubt I can afford to go, but...).

                    You're young (assuming - I just get that impression). You have a fair amount of time to spend enjoying yourself. Be prepared to do that.

                    Rapscallion
                    I'm 23 actually.

                    Yeah, i think travel may be my goal, one of my friends from highschool has threatened physical injury upon my person if I don't go to london with him at some point. So i'm going to save up for that. I'm aiming for £600 to amke it a really good trip! £200 ish of that will go on tickets/hotel/food etc and we're going to see some west end shows. ^_^ It'll be awesome.

                    Quoth Rapscallion View Post
                    Build up some funds for a decent retirement. Alternatively, funds for your own house. A huge deposit opens the eyes of prospective lenders.

                    Even better, you could save right up and take me out to lunch!

                    Rapscallion
                    I have no transport so if you can make it to Stoke i'll buy you lunch :P A nest egg is sensible but i don't think that i'll be putting out a deposit on a house just yet. I like the freedom of renting, and my rent is lower than a mortgage would be (lucky me) plus the landlord has to fix it when stuff breaks so i'll stay here for now.

                    Saving up enough to tide me over for a couple of months while transferring between jobs would be good though.

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                    • #11
                      Well, the best time to hunt for a house is while you have one, so build up the nest egg and it gives you many more options. Slamming money into a pension scheme now is going to pay more dividends many years later. Some allow you to withdraw, I think.

                      Yes, twenty-three is young from this greybeard's perspective. Stoke - not completely out of range...

                      Rapscallion

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