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  • I just told you...

    Customer: I'm looking for a thing.

    Me: I know right where that is.

    Customer: Do you know the thing?

    Me: Yes. If you'll just follow me, I'll take you right to it.

    Customer: It's a thing. It's the thing you do things with, so do you have the thing?

    Me: Really, I know exactly what the thing is as evidenced by the fact that I verbally confirmed my recognition of said thing and am now leading you to it.

    This about sums it up. I've had it happen about six times this week alone.
    Don't waste time trying to convince someone that the sky is blue.

  • #2
    The zombies, they have money... and want the things.

    There's more than one way to get your brains. There's the hard way of eating through your skull, then there's the easier way of making your grey matter liquefy and dribble out your ears.

    Comment


    • #3
      Like a gray matter smoothly.
      Don't waste time trying to convince someone that the sky is blue.

      Comment


      • #4
        You know you're close to being done when they ask for the thing.... the straw... you know, the thing you can do the thing with and have.... thingy.

        Comment


        • #5
          Closely followed by

          "There was a thing on the screen and then it didn't work. Can you make it work?"

          "Yes certainly. Third one I've had this week"

          Comment


          • #6
            These people would starve on an island with a can opener and a crate of rations.
            - They say nothing good happens at 2AM, they're right, I happen at 2AM.

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            • #7
              But, the thing is...Do you have the thing?
              "For a musician, the SNES sound engine is like using Crayola Crayons. Nobuo Uematsu used Crayola Crayons to paint the Sistine Chapel." - Jeremy Jahns (re: "Dancing Mad")
              "The difference between an amateur and a master is that the master has failed way more times." - JoCat
              "Thinking is difficult, therefore let the herd pronounce judgment!" ~ Carl Jung
              "There's burning bridges, and then there's the lake just to fill it with gasoline." - Wiccy, reddit
              "Retail is a cruel master, and could very well be the most educational time of many people's lives, in its own twisted way." - me
              "Love keeps her in the air when she oughta fall down...tell you she's hurtin' 'fore she keens...makes her a home." - Capt. Malcolm Reynolds, "Serenity" (2005)
              Acts of Gord – Read it, Learn it, Love it!
              "Our psychic powers only work if the customer has a mind to read." - me

              Comment


              • #8
                Yes. And Jaws. And Freddy Krueger. And Jason. And the girl from The Bad Seed. And we even have Chucky and his bride. They're right over here, waiting for you on isle seven.

                Will all monsters and bloodthirsty things, starting with The Thing, please report to isle seven?
                Customers should always be served . . . to the nearest great white.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Quoth EricKei View Post
                  But, the thing is...Do you have the thing?
                  She prefers to be called Mothra.
                  Don't waste time trying to convince someone that the sky is blue.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Quoth Buzzard View Post
                    You know you're close to being done when they ask for the thing.... the straw... you know, the thing you can do the thing with and have.... thingy.
                    "Hey, Marge, where's that metal dealie you use to dig...food?"

                    "You mean a spoon?"

                    "Yeah-yeah-yeah..." [starts gobbling ice cream out of the carton]

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                    • #11
                      Didja get that thing I sent ya?
                      - They say nothing good happens at 2AM, they're right, I happen at 2AM.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Quoth Argabarga View Post
                        Didja get that thing I sent ya?
                        Which thing? This thing, that thing, or the other thing?
                        PWNADE(TM) - Serve up a glass today! | PWNZER - An act of pwnage so awesome, it's like the victim got hit by a tank.

                        There are only Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse because I choose to walk!

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          They want the Thing.
                          "I don't have to be petty. The Universe does that for me."

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Just Gimme dat Ding
                            Life is too short to not eat popcorn.
                            Save the Ales!
                            Toys for Tots at Rooster's Cafe

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              De Blue ting

                              It's blue on de ting.

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