Still waiting for Ashton to pop up.

[smileyeagle1021]

I swear to God, I think that I am being punked at my second job.
Three customers in the same night.

Customer 1: Do you guys sell 7-11 brand chips?
We are not 7-11, we have no affiliation with 7-11, our name is in no way similar to 7-11, our color schemes are in no way similar, we have our own store brand (which you are holding in your hand), why would you think we carry a competitor's brand?
Customer 2: Do you guys take the Smith's rewards card?
Umm... seriously, again? We are not Smith's, we are not affiliated with them, we are several miles away from the closest one. Not only that, but we have our own rewards card, which I see in your wallet... why would we take a rewards card that competes with our own?
Customer 3: Why won't my card work? *holding out Chevron card*
FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU AND YOUR INABILITY TO READ A SIMPLE SIGN! WE AREN'T CHEVRON, SO OF COURSE THE CHEVRON CARD WON'T WORK YOU MOUTH BREATHING SIMPLETON!
And breath...

[Tama]

Ashton is too old for this shit anymore.

[earl colby pottinger]

Come on

Don't hold that anger in, it is bad for your health.

How do you really feel about these people?

[MoonCat]

My sympathies. The closest I've gotten to that is when some doofus on the phone once asked me if they could pay with their Sears card. A couple of questions made me certain they weren't asking about a Sears Visa or Mastercard, but an actual Sears charge card. And of course I said "no."

[Thana]

I get that so much at my job.. I work at Where's The Beef and I understand getting the fast food restaurants mixed up....but when you've just ordered stuff you know is only on my menu and then you do this...

"Do you have onion rings?" cue me giving a blank stare.
"Do you have curly fries?" cue me giving a blank stare.
(As I'm telling them about the new COKE Freestyle machine..)"Do you have Mt. Dew?" cue me giving blank stare.
"Do you have any cookies or shakes or anything?" cue me giving a blank stare.

[notalwaysright]

Yeah, had that before. There is another craft store in town, but it's maybe 15 minutes away. How many times have people tried to write checks to the wrong store? Or said "aren't you both owned by the same company?" No, direct competitor. Oh, my favorite!

Lady comes blazing out of nowhere, to latch onto me like a pissed off gargoyle. She's waving an empty spool of ribbon. "Why don't you keep the same items! You change your store too much, I JUST BOUGHT this ribbon and now it's GOOONE! I need more for a wedding!" I scan the ribbon, which looked unfamiliar and did not come up on my handheld. After a second I read (yes, read!) the writing. "Made exclusively for Competitor."

Also, a lot of people will ask me if we have something and when told no they do this terribly irritating "oh, well, Competitor has it, but I don't want to drive all the way over there..." and they gaze at me imploringly like I can fix it...

[AyreBiskits]

i'm sure the broom they rode in on will get them there just fine

[WishfulSpirit]

Isn't Ashton doing crime dramas now? I seem to remember having seen him in one of those blood-and-gore fests the break room TV always seems to be blasting to the immediate zip code, because actually sitting down and having some time alone with our thoughts over lunch is UNTHINKABLE.

[Titi]

With number 3 at least it was another gas station's card. I once had someone come into my gas station yelling the same way WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOUR PUMPS? I TRIED THREE AND NONE WORK!
After I finally calm her down to prepay for her gas, she goes to try and swipe her DRIVERS LICENSE! I asked her if that was the card that she swiped at the pump and she says, "Yes." I inform her to look at the card. We had a good laugh after that.

[Seanette]

Reminds me of a time I'd gone to the library, then stopped at a nearby store. Tried to swipe my library card to pay for purchases. The cashier and I both thought it was funny.

SO glad the breakroom where I work doesn't have a TV. All the top-of-the-lungs conversations, plus people blasting music from their phones, are quite bad enough, TYVM.

[Racket_Man]

******** looks at the pizza place where I work ======= YEP STILL has a red roof *************************

People will call my red roof pizza place and specifically ask for some product or promotion from the likes of the Dice pizza, Poppy Joes, some regional chain, some local Mom & Pop/Indie place some Chinese place, etc.

The worst offenders are the ones who SPECIFICALLY call my red roof pizza place to

GET THE PHONE NUMBER of a NOT red roof pizza place or restaurant.

[dalesys]

...GET THE PHONE NUMBER of a NOT red roof pizza place or restaurant.

You've got a telefellatione book... Lick it oop!

[minkysmom]

People always proudly slap competitor coupons on my counter and i so proudly hand them back, 'sorry ms, this is for nickels. ' that's what they get for being so smug.

[BPFH]

With number 3 at least it was another gas station's card. I once had someone come into my gas station yelling the same way WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOUR PUMPS? I TRIED THREE AND NONE WORK!
After I finally calm her down to prepay for her gas, she goes to try and swipe her DRIVERS LICENSE! I asked her if that was the card that she swiped at the pump and she says, "Yes." I inform her to look at the card. We had a good laugh after that.

We had a gas station around here where the pumps somehow got badly misconfigured. If you swiped your driver's license, the pump would activate. And since there's no means of payment attached to the license, you'd get your gas for free. Of course, you'd swiped your license, and the pumps were recording that information... including name and address.

I'm led to believe that the Washtenaw County prosecutor's office didn't have to work too hard on that case.

[raudf]

Payment types that people tried to use at MW repair - every competitor's charge cards. These cards were only good for their own store chains, not the VISA or Master Card types that could be used anywhere. This was before a lot of stores sold their charge cards to the demons of credit cards.

Look, what does the sign on our door say? Now the one on the counter top here? MW Repair. You're holding a JC Copper Bits charge card. No, it doesn't work like your VISA. It's for JC Copper Bits. No, I'm not doing this to hook you up with an MW charge card, because I don't even have the paperwork for that. We can't process applications here either. Don't you DARE suggest that to corporate. I know where you live, if you do, and I will send out the choir of angry shop clerks to keep you awake at all hours of the day or night. And to take craps on your car.

Seriously, the two leading cards we'd get were JC Copper Bits and Sears.