My favorite guest complaints

[Lovecats]

Just curious, but are pepperoni, meat lover's, hawaiian, and most other pizzas "all ages", but you need to show government-issued photo ID that proves you're 21 or older if you want to get a margherita?

OK, everyone - before you start with the boos, remember that CS doesn't have a provision for showing proof of age.

But I left my ID in the car!

[Jester]

People... Cant live with them, cant hurt them legally.

Not legally, no....

1&2: Okay, we'll just have to rip the resort down and start over. You personally get to approve the final size. THEN will you be happy?

No.

3&4: So we'll buy the convenience store and make it part of the resort, and also lobby the city/wherever to raise the speed limit. What speed would you like?

None. Or barring that, 120.

5: We'll make signs which say, "look around, you are at the beach."

Not specific enough.

6: Certainly! We will build a menu-room for books with every single possible dish we could make.

Too much reading. We're on vacation, damn it!

But I left my ID in the car!

I deal with that one often. And variations thereof. Sadly for these people, leaving their ID in their car, hotel, other purse, on the cruise ship, with their husband, in their other pants, in last night's costume, or with their guard kangaroo still doesn't change in any way Florida's law concerning alcohol purchases and proper identification.

I'd shed a tear for them if I actually gave a shit.

[jennie]

Have you tried the Good King Wenceslas pizza?








It's deep pan,crisp and even Thank you very much,I'll be here all week,enjoy the veal...

OMG, that's one that my Dad - who used to love puns- would have giveen his eye teeth to have thought of

[mathnerd]

or with their guard kangaroo

If anybody else said this, I would think maybe they were taking a bit of poetic license, but since it's Jester, I'm thinking there has to be a story here.

[Jester]

OMG, that's one that my Dad - who used to love puns- would have giveen his eye teeth to have thought of

I don't get it. I just don't get it. I must be unfamiliar with something here....but I have no idea what.

If anybody else said this, I would think maybe they were taking a bit of poetic license, but since it's Jester, I'm thinking there has to be a story here.

Yes, because I never say anything outrageous or ridiculous.

No, in this case, it was purely poetic license, hyperbole, and silliness to make a point. I have never seen a kangaroo on this island, and get the feeling that the only way I ever would would be either in a cartoon or on a menu.

[retro]

#5 reminds me of an episode of Fawlty Towers where a guest was complaining about beach access. Basil ripped open the shades and pointed out the window. "THAT'S TOR QUAY!!!!!"

That's the sea. Between the land and the sky.

[mathnerd]

Yes, because I never say anything outrageous or ridiculous.

No, in this case, it was purely poetic license, hyperbole, and silliness to make a point. I have never seen a kangaroo on this island, and get the feeling that the only way I ever would would be either in a cartoon or on a menu.

It's not that you never say anything outrageous, but that it's Key West. I'm disappointed there's not a story...

[Ironclad Alibi]

Have you tried the Good King Wenceslas pizza?

It's deep pan,crisp and even.

I don't get it. I just don't get it. I must be unfamiliar with something here....but I have no idea what.

It is play on the words from the song.

Good King Wenceslas looked out on the feast of Stephen,
when the snow lay round about, deep and crisp and even.
Brightly shown the moon that night, though the frost was cruel,
when a poor man came in sight,gathering winter fuel.

I didn't get it either and had to Google it. I think it is a weak joke.

[AccountingDrone]

It's not that you never say anything outrageous, but that it's Key West. I'm disappointed there's not a story...

I am sure he could come up with something

[Kim Brody]

What?! How did these people even manage to get to the resort?! I... I... just don't understand! A freaking fly is smarter than these people!

[Jester]

It's not that you never say anything outrageous, but that it's Key West. I'm disappointed there's not a story...

Okay, to be fair, it IS Key West, or as many call it, Key Weird, so I can see that anything might be expected, as just about anything could happen here. Sorry to disappoint you, though.

I am sure he could come up with something

For a guard kangaroo? I could fake something, sure. Even make it sound believable, more so to anyone who's been to this crazy little island. But, honestly, that's just not me.

That being said, I DO have a guard chicken in my truck, guarding the truck from all enemies, foreign and domestic. And that includes rogue kangaroos. And on this point, I am being absolutely honest, no poetic license needed.

[fireheart]

Just curious, but are pepperoni, meat lover's, hawaiian, and most other pizzas "all ages", but you need to show government-issued photo ID that proves you're 21 or older if you want to get a margherita?

*groan* Maybe if the tomatoes were left in alcohol for a while...

guard kangaroo

What?!?!?! (Also I didn't realise that kangaroos had escaped from Aussieland )

Also re the Good King joke: I had to sing the song in my head before I got it. Anyone else did this?

[hotelnpa]

I recently left my payroll clerk position to work full time again at the hotel and was promoted to Assistant Manager. As Assistant Manager, I now read the guest comments on our company website as well as Trip Advisor and I have seen all of these or variants of the complaints. Part of my job is to respond to the complaints.

Hopefully I made the right decision to become Assistant Manager. Not only am I responding to every guest issue, I am dealing with the drama of my co-workers which is a different animal.

[bhskittykatt]

Part of my job is to respond to the complaints.

Don't forget, you are high enough up the food chain you can delegate.

Our AGM likes to send my CWs the more obnoxious complaints (somehow, I've avoided being assigned responses all but once). He says it's to see how we respond, but I'm fairly sure it's really 'cause he just doesn't want to deal with them.

[Valentinian]

I have never seen a kangaroo on this island, and get the feeling that the only way I ever would would be either in a cartoon or on a menu.

Well... they are both comedic and delicious!