Yes, everything costs a dollar, HOWEVER

[MrsEclipse]

Just because everything costs a dollar, that doesn't mean you can grab up five items, throw five dollars at the register, and then scuttle out. I'm sorry. It doesn't. I know that years ago, the dollar store used to count items by hand and charge you that way. Those days are gone. Now we have to scan each individual item. I know. It's such a hardship for you. But it is a burden you must endure. And I know we can get through this together.

Now, you may ask me why we do it that way instead of the easy way (or, I should say, easy for you. Come inventory time, our way turns out to be sooooo easy, you guys. Sooooo easy.) I could explain to you how our inventory system is completely computerized and when we run low on things, it automatically tells the warehouse what to send us. Or I could explain how some things are taxed and others aren't, and also a few things are less than a dollar. You would understand that, right?

Yes, some people have to be assholes about it. I know, big surprise, right? That, like, never happens on this website.

People demand to know why I need to scan everything if everything's a dollar. First I just explain that it's policy. Then if they demand to know why, I'll give them some watered down version of the inventory story. Sometimes, upon hearing that, they snarl, "Well, that's not my problem!" Hey, guess what? It is! Because you are not leaving until I have scanned each and every item you want to buy. We can do this the easy way, the hard way, or the Max Power way.

Oh, and you can't just buy something and swap it out for something else. You have to do an exchange, like if you were returning it. Yes. I know it's a hassle. It is for me, too. But we can get through this together like grownups. If you are such a humongous baby that you can't wait for me to scan two items, and then sign your name on a piece of paper, then you need to go back to daycare because this is a store for grownups who realize that you have to deal with inconvenient shit like this all the time in life, and it's just the way it is. And if you're busy? Come back later. You have a month.

A lady today, at checkout, asked me if we still carried Such-and-Such, because she couldn't find it. I told her we did, and where it was, and she asked me to ring up "one more thing" so she could go and grab it. I said no, sorry, I needed to scan the item. She looked at me like she just bit into a hundred lemons and said that's fine, she'd be back (I would have waited for her to grab it if the line weren't six people deep.) She left, and came up to me at the counter a minute later saying, "I'm just going to leave the so-and-so behind and take the such-and-such instead."

I replied, "I'm sorry, but it still needs to be scanned. You're going to have to do an exchange for that. My manager is at that register there, she can do it for you."

"NO I DON'T HAVE TO EXCHANGE IT YOU ALREADY HAVE MY FUCKING DOLLAR THIS IS RIDICULOUS I'M TAKING IT AND LEAVING!"

"Okay. Thanks for the extra money."

"WHAT EXTRA MONEY? WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"

"So-and-so is taxed. Such-and-such isn't. There's a six cents difference."

"BIG FUCKING DEAL, I WAS GOING TO THROW AWAY THE SIX CENTS ANYWAY! I'M NOT GOING THROUGH THIS FOR SIX FUCKING CENTS! I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS PLACE!"

"Okay. Bye."

The next lady was all sympathy about it, and I really appreciate it, I truly did, but she kept on saying, "Don't worry, it'll be okay," and all those platitudes over and over and over again. You know, instead of answering my questions such as whether she needed a bag or how she was going to pay. She even said, "See, you had a bad customer, and now you have a good one! Just relax, everything is fine..." Look, if you want to be a good customer, then participate in the transaction, don't just talk like a dime store therapist. I don't need you to tell me to relax five times, I need you to swipe your damn debit card. Like I said, I appreciate where you're coming from, but I want to get the transaction done and you are preventing that from happening. That makes me want to punch your face. But then I fell bad about wanting to, because you're trying to be nice, you're just driving me crazy about it. You shouldn't punch people's faces if they're trying to make you feel better. That's just plain rude.

So, yeah. Please come shop at our dollar store. Just be aware that you have to bring items up to the counter and have us scan them, and to do a computer transaction if you want to buy something different. Just like at, oh, say, EVER OTHER STORE IN THE AREA AND MOST OF THE COUNTRY AND MAYBE EVEN THE WORLD, GUYS, I DON'T KNOW HOW IT WORKS OUT THERE.

[sirwired]

And of course some of the items at a dollar store are less than a dollar... but I suppose you can't bring that up due to the ensuing hissy-fit if no items in their pile happen to come up that way.

[notalwaysright]

The next lady was all sympathy about it, and I really appreciate it, I truly did, but she kept on saying, "Don't worry, it'll be okay," and all those platitudes over and over and over again. You know, instead of answering my questions such as whether she needed a bag or how she was going to pay. She even said, "See, you had a bad customer, and now you have a good one! Just relax, everything is fine..." Look, if you want to be a good customer, then participate in the transaction, don't just talk like a dime store therapist. I don't need you to tell me to relax five times, I need you to swipe your damn debit card.

Serious! I haaaate these people. I do appreciate the fact that the "nice" person recognized a sucky person, but going on and on about it is not helpful! And it makes me feel like I'm acting stressed or emotional or whatever, when I had thought I was acting normal. If that makes sense. Also, usually these people talk loud, and anyone around assumes that I'm freaking out.

At the old dollar store I was behind a woman who wanted an item that was 2 for $1, but she only wanted 1, and she wanted it for $.50. That's not how their system worked, it was ONLY $1. So she ended up paying $1 and refusing to take the second item. Wacko.

[XCashier]

Some people just have to make drama where they can. They're pathetic. And to those "in a hurry", well, what're you doing messing around in a store rather than getting to where you're in such a "hurry" to get to? If you can't manage your time properly, that's your problem, not the store clerk's or anyone else's.

Every store has to scan each item. As you said, it's for inventory purposes. You have to scan thousands of identically-priced items, we have to measure and account for every inch of fabric or trim, a restaurant has to write up every scrap of food wasted, bartenders have to make drinks a specific way. Corporate counts every last bean and brings their wrath upon any store where there's a discrepancy. It's easier and more accurate to do inventory as you go along. And of course, those who've never worked a single millisecond in customer service Just Don't Get It; they think we're just being fussy to inconvenience them.

[MoonCat]

Reminds me of the time a CW told me what it was like to work at McD's. They had to account for literally every single burger patty, every single paper bag, every single paper wrapper, and so on. Drop a wrapper on the floor? Yes, it gets tossed, but it still must be accounted for.

I never knew those places had to be SO exact that even throwing out ONE wrapper and not accounting for it could throw their whole system off.

[taxguykarl]

Not only that, but a lot of states have odd hair-splitting sales tax schedules, based on the type of merchandise (food, medicine, etc).

[Trixie]

Ugh, I hate people like well, both of them. Same story must scan everything. If I can see that they have two of the same kind of 12 packs I'm not going to make them put each one on the counter but if they're all different yes, I need all of them to scan. I find that a lot of old people like to take stuff and leave money the money. Sorry, this isn't the olden days when you a kid could go buy cigarettes for Pop and it would be okay.

The overly nice ones drive me crazy too. The other day I was helping a lady with graduation announcements and she was nice just high maintenance. And she kept thanking me for my help and calling me babe. Just the way she said made it sound like she called everybody that so annoying but not weird. Not sure that makes sense. But anyway, I'm glad people are happy that I've helped them but really enough with the thanks.

[EricKei]

MoonCat - I can understand that, actually. Food places mostly track their actual food costs for waste (they wanna keep it below a certain, very small % of sales), as well as costs for containers like soft drink cups and tog-go boxes (generally about a quarter each)...But for a place as big as Mickey D's, the wrappers thing kinda makes sense to me. Let's say that every store in the nation has to toss an average of one of those a day -- That's probably enough to account for a case or two of the damn things per day -- and they probably waste a good bit more than that. They don't care about one wasted wrapper; they care about thousands of wasted wrappers per day. Does that make sense? ^_^;>

[TimmyHate]

Homer: Kids. From now on there are three ways of doing things: the right way, the wrong way, and the Max Power way.

Bart: Isn't that just the wrong way?

Homer: Yes, but faster.

[Food Lady]

It reminds me of the people who tell me "It's 79 cents" when I am looking for a produce code. Yes, I can enter the price and mark it tax-free, but still, the codes exist for a reason. The system needs to know it's produce as opposed to regular merchandise.

[Trixie]

We sell mostly seasonal stuff that has price tags on it that usually fall off. I need something to scan but people will just tell me the price. Yeah, not gonna work. Get me something to scan.

[mhkohne]

People demand to know why I need to scan everything if everything's a dollar.

Because that's what they f-ing pay me for! If they didn't want it all scanned, they'd give me a freaking bucket to stand by the door and catch thrown money instead of a register with scanner!

[DGoddessChardonnay]

It reminds me of the people who tell me "It's 79 cents" when I am looking for a produce code. Yes, I can enter the price and mark it tax-free, but still, the codes exist for a reason. The system needs to know it's produce as opposed to regular merchandise.

I used to HATE those when running a register. It still doesn't tell the computer WHAT the item is by keying in only the price (either unit or by the pound.)

Not to mention that it all goes back to our wonderful Inventory system that keeps track of every single UPC or PLU in the store. Don't get me started on the formula for figuring up items made in store (such as deli sandwiches.) That's pretty complicated for me - even though I have to do an annual CBT course on Inventory System

Luckily for me, that's kept up with as part of the monthly Deli inventory, and that's the department manager's baby. I do good just trying to keep up with the vendor stuff in the store.

[Kit-Ginevra]

This is one of the joys of a small village store. You can run in,grab a lettuce and chuck the money on the counter. Or if you're very good friends,as has happened occasionally,grab your lettuce, tell them I've got no money on me-I'll give it to you tomorrow at church Try doing that at WalMart...

[EricKei]

DGC - I figured that they would just be set up as Assembly Items. e.g., computer knows what goes into each deli item combo and what the costs are, and you just tell the system "We made 50 of these today and sold 45." It should be able to do the rest.