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She Did What?!?

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  • #16
    Quoth Soulstealer View Post
    When I worked for the public library here we used to get a lot of crap put in the lost and found too. The most memorable one was a clay statue of a really ugly clown. You could tell some amatuer did it, it was that ugly. Anyway it was just left on our sidewalk and my boss said we had to take it to the lost and found. No one ever claimed it and I was happy when the 30 days was up and I could smash it to my heart's content.
    How dare you! You killed Travelocity's roaming gnome!
    The Borg wouldn't know fun if they assimilated an amusement park. -- B'Elanna Torres, Star Trek: Voyager

    Math! Math, my dear boy, is but the lesbian sister of Biology. -- Peter Griffin, Family Guy

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    • #17
      Quoth aurelemsrealm View Post
      How dare you! You killed Travelocity's roaming gnome!

      I laughed til I cried!
      I'm bringing disdain back...with a vengeance.

      Oh, and your tool box called...you got out again.

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      • #18
        Quoth Foxglove8778 View Post
        could be a bomb.
        "Has your luggage been in your possession the past twenty four hours? Has anyone you don't know asked you to bring any luggage on the plane?"
        "I call murder on that!"

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        • #19
          Quoth Juwl View Post
          "Has your luggage been in your possession the past twenty four hours? Has anyone you don't know asked you to bring any luggage on the plane?"
          "Yeah actually this really nice guy with the towel on his head packed my luggage for me!"

          Just for Laughs festival, damned if I remember the name of the comic...
          Now would be a good time to visit So Very Unofficial!

          "I've had so many nasty customers this week, my bottomless pit is now ankle-deep."-Me.

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          • #20
            Quoth Shironu-Akaineko View Post
            "Yeah actually this really nice guy with the towel on his head packed my luggage for me!"
            And I remember the days when you could get away with that kind of stuff at the check-in counter, when accompanied by the appropriate eye-roll and laugh. These days, everyone is so ing uptight that it makes me wince when I have to travel even more than the lines... which I've never found particularly long.
            ...WHY DO YOU TEMPT WHAT LITTLE FAITH IN HUMANITY I HAVE!?! -- Kalga
            And I want a pony for Christmas but neither of us is getting what we want OK! What you are asking is impossible. -- Wicked Lexi

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            • #21
              Quoth JustADude View Post
              And I remember the days when you could get away with that kind of stuff at the check-in counter, when accompanied by the appropriate eye-roll and laugh. These days, everyone is so ing uptight that it makes me wince when I have to travel even more than the lines... which I've never found particularly long.

              It's probably revenge as they're still not allowed to say "Never heard that one before ha ha ha"

              Lady, people aren't chocolates. D'you know what they are mostly? Bastards. Bastard-coated bastards with bastard filling. Dr Cox - Scrubs

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              • #22
                Quoth Naaman View Post
                It's probably revenge as they're still not allowed to say "Never heard that one before ha ha ha"

                Not saying it wasn't , just that you used to be able to crack those kinds of lame jokes without repercussions.
                ...WHY DO YOU TEMPT WHAT LITTLE FAITH IN HUMANITY I HAVE!?! -- Kalga
                And I want a pony for Christmas but neither of us is getting what we want OK! What you are asking is impossible. -- Wicked Lexi

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                • #23
                  Quoth Shironu-Akaineko View Post
                  "Yeah actually this really nice guy with the towel on his head packed my luggage for me!"
                  "What if I'm singing? Bom-bom-bom, bom-ba-ba-ram? Or, what if I'm talking about lip balm?"
                  "I call murder on that!"

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                  • #24
                    The library draws the biggest bunch of lunatics. I can't believe I'm actually getting out this week.

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                    • #25
                      Quoth Foxglove8778 View Post
                      could be a bomb.
                      To be honest, probably not, its not a high value military target, its not (probably) an intensly crowded public area, unlike a shopping arcade, its not a target that would generate a large amount of publicity nor would it have an impact on the countries infrastructure, unless of course said library in a military base above the officers mess next to a press office under an electricity substation.
                      A PSA, if I may, as well as another.

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                      • #26
                        I bet the box contained a parallel universe!

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                        • #27
                          Quoth JustADude View Post
                          And I remember the days when you could get away with that kind of stuff at the check-in counter, when accompanied by the appropriate eye-roll and laugh. These days, everyone is so ing uptight that it makes me wince when I have to travel even more than the lines... which I've never found particularly long.
                          And THIS is the reason I like road tripping it when I can. You know who is in charge of luggage in the Jestermobile? I AM! And I decide what can go and what can't, and I don't have to give any reasons, and the only people I strip search are those that let me. (Total to date: zero. Well, none that were done for the simple purpose of being allowed in the Jestermobile, anyways....) I can bring as much luggage as I feel like, there is no weight limit (the only limit is the space inside the Jestermobile, which is plentiful), it doesn't have to be packed a certain way, it can be locked or unlocked, I can pack any kind of liquid toiletries I want to bring with me, etc., etc. I also determine my own schedule, subject only to traffic and construction delays. I also control the entertainment (radio), climate (windows or AC), enforce my own nonsmoking rule (hey, my truck!), and decide who does and who doesn't get to board Air Jester!

                          And I can make all the jokes about bombs, hazardous material, terrorists, and murderers I want, and no one can fuck with me! MUAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

                          ...Of course, I'm usually just talking to myself with all of the above.

                          But still, road trips rock!



                          (Of course, on planes, I do get to drink my fill of beer and cocktails....but then there are always tradeoffs.....)

                          "The Customer Is Always Right...But The Bartender Decides Who Is
                          Still A Customer."

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                          • #28
                            Quoth LizaMarie View Post
                            I bet the box contained a parallel universe!
                            Is Zoidberg King of the Box?
                            If so: Sweet, Zoidberg's King of the Box.
                            If not: You've gots the wrong box.
                            "I call murder on that!"

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                            • #29
                              I bet the box contained a cat....

                              But with all the time it spent there, I wonder if the poor thing was alive or not.
                              I pet animals, I rescue insects, I hug trees.

                              "I picture the lead singer of Gwar screaming 'People of Japan, look at my balls! My swinging pendulous balls!!!'" -- Khyras

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                              • #30
                                Quoth Jester View Post
                                I also control the entertainment (radio), climate (windows or AC), enforce my own nonsmoking rule (hey, my truck!), and decide who does and who doesn't get to board Air Jester!
                                And the vertical and the horizontal?

                                Quoth Bliss View Post
                                I bet the box contained a cat....

                                But with all the time it spent there, I wonder if the poor thing was alive or not.
                                *gasp* But you can't tell without looking in the box!
                                Ba'al: I'm a god. Gods are all-knowing.

                                http://unrelatedcaptions.com/45147

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