Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Things I am not allowed to do at work.

Collapse
This is a sticky topic.
X
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • There is no known version of The Little Drummer Boy that includes the lyrics "I think I have to take a dump-a-dump-dump."

    Don't create one either.

    The song We Need A Little Christmas may remind me of Roll Out The Barrel, but that doesn't mean I should start singing Roll Out The Barrel every time I hear We Need A Little Christmas.
    Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.

    "I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost daily

    Comment


    • Quoth Irving Patrick Freleigh View Post
      There is no known version of The Little Drummer Boy that includes the lyrics "I think I have to take a dump-a-dump-dump."

      Don't create one either.
      Thanks for nearly ruining my favorite Christmas song.

      Quoth Irving Patrick Freleigh View Post
      The song We Need A Little Christmas may remind me of Roll Out The Barrel, but that doesn't mean I should start singing Roll Out The Barrel every time I hear We Need A Little Christmas.
      I Roll Out The Barrel.
      Unseen but seeing
      oh dear, now they're masquerading as sane-KiaKat
      There isn't enough interpretive dance in the workplace these days-Irv
      3rd shift needs love, too
      RIP, mo bhrionglóid

      Comment


      • Quoth Irving Patrick Freleigh View Post
        There is no known version of The Little Drummer Boy that includes the lyrics "I think I have to take a dump-a-dump-dump."

        Don't create one either.
        Am I bad for sying I actually want to see how that goes?
        The best professors are mad scientists! -Zoom

        Now queen of USSR-Land...

        Comment


        • Quoth fireheart View Post
          Am I bad for sying I actually want to see how that goes?
          Yes. You are bad. Very bad.
          Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.

          "I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost daily

          Comment


          • Quoth Irving Patrick Freleigh View Post
            Yes. You are bad. Very bad.
            Spank me with a reindeer?
            The best professors are mad scientists! -Zoom

            Now queen of USSR-Land...

            Comment


            • Quoth Irving Patrick Freleigh View Post
              There is no known version of The Little Drummer Boy that includes the lyrics "I think I have to take a dump-a-dump-dump."

              Don't create one either.
              On that note: singing Sammy Small at the workplace is ungood. Especially when you know all the lyrics.

              Falling onto your knees and praising Cthulhu must not be done on company time.

              There is nothing funny about any combinations of letters and numbers in a serial number. Not even DDR (German Democratic Republic) and 007.

              Comment


              • There is no version of "I've Got My Love To Keep Me Warm" that includes the lyric "Off with my pants."

                Don't invent one either.

                There also is no version of the same song containing the lyric "My butt's on fire."

                Don't create one either.

                Even if you think it would make a good holiday-themed commercial for Preparation H.
                Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.

                "I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost daily

                Comment


                • Quoth Irving Patrick Freleigh View Post
                  There is no version of "I've Got My Love To Keep Me Warm" that includes the lyric "Off with my pants."

                  Don't invent one either.

                  There also is no version of the same song containing the lyric "My butt's on fire."

                  Don't create one either.

                  Even if you think it would make a good holiday-themed commercial for Preparation H.
                  I can see you in that commercial. . . hopping around like the Easter Bunny :lmao:
                  Human Resources - the adult version of "I'm telling Mom." - Agent Anthony "Tony" DiNozzo (NCIS)

                  Comment


                  • Quoth DGoddessChardonnay View Post
                    I can see you in that commercial. . . hopping around like the Easter Bunny :lmao:
                    ...there goes peter chasing tail....
                    I am not an a**hole. I am a hemorrhoid. I irritate a**holes!
                    Procrastination: Forward planning to insure there is something to do tomorrow.
                    Derails threads faster than a pocket nuke.

                    Comment


                    • Not allowed to respond to the question "Do you have chicken?" with " No, but I have this box of rabid honey badgers!"

                      Not allowed to put a " Proud to be gay" sticker on the managers truck.

                      Not allowed to loudly sing " I've had an absolute cunt of a day!" while customers are in ear shot.

                      Not allowed to grab the big knife, run out into the dining room a loudly ask " Did you see which way that rat went?"

                      Not allowed to reply to "God Bless" with "Hail Satan"

                      Not allowed to hang up on customers when I ask if they can hold and they say no.
                      Last edited by HappyFun Ball; 12-28-2011, 08:42 AM.
                      http://www.customerssuck.com/?m=20080203

                      My destiny is not pretty, but it's what my cutie mark is telling me.

                      Comment


                      • I am not alowed to quote anything out of Tucker Max's books or his movie. EVER.
                        ......../\
                        ....../__\
                        ..../\...../\
                        ../__\../__\

                        Comment


                        • When backstocking a case of those big long butane BBQ lighter thingies, don't cut the brightly colored placard reading "Flammable Gas" off the box and walk around with it stuck in my belt, just above my butt.

                          ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

                          Noting that a certain yard statue we carry looks kinda like Kermit the Frog is okay.

                          Talking like Kermit the Frog is okay. As far as I know.

                          However, having a tin, pig-shaped watering can act as Miss Piggy, and posing the two items so it looks like Miss Piggy is performing a sex act upon Kermit is very much a no-no.

                          I only did the first two. My co-workers did the third. They're a bad influence, you know.
                          Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.

                          "I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost daily

                          Comment


                          • Asking a customer "Then why the hell did you buy it in the first place?" when they bitch about not actually liking a lottery ticket that they bought (and didn't win off of) is very much not allowed. Also, singing the song "Sex Life" by Destroy Rebuild Until God Shows (D.R.U.G.S for short) at work is highly inappropriate. Hell, most of the songs that I'd like to sing at work are inappropriate.
                            "And though she be but little, she is FIERCE!"--Shakespeare

                            Comment


                            • Quoth BrenDAnn View Post
                              Asking a customer "Then why the hell did you buy it in the first place?" when they bitch about not actually liking a lottery ticket that they bought (and didn't win off of) is very much not allowed. Also, singing the song "Sex Life" by Destroy Rebuild Until God Shows (D.R.U.G.S for short) at work is highly inappropriate. Hell, most of the songs that I'd like to sing at work are inappropriate.
                              D.R.U.G.S.!! One of the less heavy heavy metal bands I love. (I much prefer Winds of Plague and the like.) I like blasting my metal on my phone after close while I do my end of shift/night stuff. It's almost expected among my coworkers (and the dudes that clean the floors over the weekend).
                              Driver Picks the Music, Shotgun Shuts His Cakehole.
                              Supernatural 9-13-05 to forever

                              Comment


                              • Haha well that was unexpected, dragon_wings. What makes it bad though is the part of the song that always gets stuck in my head is the chorus-- "If you had a SEX LIFE a SEX LIFE, would you even worry about mine? When your bed is empty, you're a waste of time!" You can see how non work appropriate that is, haha!
                                "And though she be but little, she is FIERCE!"--Shakespeare

                                Comment

                                Working...
                                X