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Well, we almost made it through the year with nobody trying to drive their car OFF one of the tow trucks.
Almost......
As I'm sure you know, "almost" only counts with horseshoes and hand grenades.
Our intrepid scofflaw had decided to park in a lot he had no permit for, and turned on his "come and get me" lights.
So we obliged.
Cue scofflaw running out of the apartment and patiently explaining, as if we were all 2 year olds working the tow truck with one hand and clutching our favorite teddy bear in the other, that he was "only there for half an hour" and "had no where else to park" and was "just helping his girlfriend move" and the ridiculousness of what we were doing to him should be self evident.
Cue us patiently explaining that none of that fixes the fact he has no permit to be here, flashers mean nothing, and if his dear GF lives here, why didn't SHE inform him of this? Go ahead, ask her, she's standing RIGHT THERE with you. Anyway, you're not going anywhere tonight until we get our $75 drop.
Well this was apparently a challenge to his manhood! So he did the one thing any red-blooded male would do in this situation:
He told his Girl to get in the car (well, truck) and drive it off the tow truck, since "it's not that far off the ground, you can make that" .
Yeah, HE'S not going to risk HIS life and limb! That's for his fair maiden to do!
We try to impress upon her that this is a Very Bad Idea (tm) but darn, she's quick, and gets inside the truck before we even had a chance to try and pick it up higher than it was (about 6 inches) and start the engine. We hit the hydraulics and stand it nearly up on the front bumper. (Well, only maybe a 30 or 40 degree angle, but, it certainly SEEMS like it's on the front bumper to anyone inside) We figured that was a deterrent enough, it wasn't, she starts goosing the throttle, trying to rock it off the wheel hooks.
Boyfriend by now has realized that his tuck falling three feet isn't going to do his suspension any favors and is frantically trying to wave her off, but she can neither see nor hear him, hanging in the air with the windows rolled up and engine revving.
Undaunted by the fact the sky is no longer visible outside her windshield, only pavement, she keeps going until the tires roll out of the hooks, and it falls, and snags itself on the same hooks by it's undercarriage at an awkward angle. The wheels are now spinning impotently in the air.
Ever see what a cat looks like when someone picks it up by one of it's hind legs?
YEah, it kinda looked like that.
Boyfriend looks flummoxed, he didn't expect that to happen, he ponders the situation.
"I guess I'll pay" he says.
We tell him that all depends on if the cops decide that's still an option at this point. Since while he was dilly-dallying, we were DIALING, 911 that is...
This really takes the wind out of his sails, his brilliant plan to stick it to Da Man (tm) has resulting in Da Man possibly coming to stick him in the backseat of a cop car.
He's looking for SOME silver lining now.... he thinks he's found it.
"Uh, but, if anything, like, got damaged when it fell off, you guys are still responsible for that, right?"
"Heh, no, that's all on you"
Now it's slowly starting to dawn on him that maybe, just maybe, he's made a mistake....
Fortunately, the cops were in a forgiving mood, and did give him the option to pay the $75 and have us put the truck down the rest of the way, gently of course. And did mention to him that next time, perhaps, maybe, he should just pay to start with, and save them the paperwork.
My advice? Uh, strongly, STRONGLY consider they know a bit more about the proper way to act when you get towed, we expect much better decorum from the public than throwing your girlfriend under the bus, er, truck like that.
Almost......
As I'm sure you know, "almost" only counts with horseshoes and hand grenades.
Our intrepid scofflaw had decided to park in a lot he had no permit for, and turned on his "come and get me" lights.
So we obliged.
Cue scofflaw running out of the apartment and patiently explaining, as if we were all 2 year olds working the tow truck with one hand and clutching our favorite teddy bear in the other, that he was "only there for half an hour" and "had no where else to park" and was "just helping his girlfriend move" and the ridiculousness of what we were doing to him should be self evident.
Cue us patiently explaining that none of that fixes the fact he has no permit to be here, flashers mean nothing, and if his dear GF lives here, why didn't SHE inform him of this? Go ahead, ask her, she's standing RIGHT THERE with you. Anyway, you're not going anywhere tonight until we get our $75 drop.
Well this was apparently a challenge to his manhood! So he did the one thing any red-blooded male would do in this situation:
He told his Girl to get in the car (well, truck) and drive it off the tow truck, since "it's not that far off the ground, you can make that" .
Yeah, HE'S not going to risk HIS life and limb! That's for his fair maiden to do!
We try to impress upon her that this is a Very Bad Idea (tm) but darn, she's quick, and gets inside the truck before we even had a chance to try and pick it up higher than it was (about 6 inches) and start the engine. We hit the hydraulics and stand it nearly up on the front bumper. (Well, only maybe a 30 or 40 degree angle, but, it certainly SEEMS like it's on the front bumper to anyone inside) We figured that was a deterrent enough, it wasn't, she starts goosing the throttle, trying to rock it off the wheel hooks.
Boyfriend by now has realized that his tuck falling three feet isn't going to do his suspension any favors and is frantically trying to wave her off, but she can neither see nor hear him, hanging in the air with the windows rolled up and engine revving.
Undaunted by the fact the sky is no longer visible outside her windshield, only pavement, she keeps going until the tires roll out of the hooks, and it falls, and snags itself on the same hooks by it's undercarriage at an awkward angle. The wheels are now spinning impotently in the air.
Ever see what a cat looks like when someone picks it up by one of it's hind legs?
YEah, it kinda looked like that.
Boyfriend looks flummoxed, he didn't expect that to happen, he ponders the situation.
"I guess I'll pay" he says.
We tell him that all depends on if the cops decide that's still an option at this point. Since while he was dilly-dallying, we were DIALING, 911 that is...
This really takes the wind out of his sails, his brilliant plan to stick it to Da Man (tm) has resulting in Da Man possibly coming to stick him in the backseat of a cop car.
He's looking for SOME silver lining now.... he thinks he's found it.
"Uh, but, if anything, like, got damaged when it fell off, you guys are still responsible for that, right?"
"Heh, no, that's all on you"
Now it's slowly starting to dawn on him that maybe, just maybe, he's made a mistake....
Fortunately, the cops were in a forgiving mood, and did give him the option to pay the $75 and have us put the truck down the rest of the way, gently of course. And did mention to him that next time, perhaps, maybe, he should just pay to start with, and save them the paperwork.
My advice? Uh, strongly, STRONGLY consider they know a bit more about the proper way to act when you get towed, we expect much better decorum from the public than throwing your girlfriend under the bus, er, truck like that.
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