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We've had more expired permit violations this semester than I can remember from almost any semester past. And certainly more bitching about getting towed for having an expired permit than I can remember happening in semesters past.
Had these almost back-to-back-to-back today, and keep in mind, these are people who just NOW are realizing (on the 21st) that they were towed on the 13th for permits that ran out on the 31st of LAST YEAR.
Just keep that in mind.
It's Not Fake (If You Have a Real One)
Well, this certainly takes some brass cojones You get towed for having a fake permit (well, 90% real, 10% fake, you changed the expiration date, crappily) and instead of coming to get the car, you whine to Global Domination Reality that you got towed for having a fake permit.
The same company that issues said permits
The same one you just committed FRAUD upon.
Well, okay, to your fleeting credit, you didn't tell them you had a FAKE permit, you left that part out, you told them that we at Friendly Neighborhood Towing had up and absconded with your vehicular conveyance illegally, because you had a permit.
This, of course, caused GDR to call us for our side of the story.
Which we told them, in Director's Cut version, not leaving out the part about the fake permit.
They then called you back and said "well duh, of course you're going to get towed for that"
You still seemed to think yourself the victim, to wit you said: "But I was going to come down to the office and get a new permit, I just didn't have the TIME!!!! I only changed the dates so I wouldn't be towed until I could get there"
Oh wait, you're serious aren't you? DEAR GOD NO, NO!!!! YOU'RE SERIOUS!?!??!!
Yep, he didn't see why he couldn't use a fake permit to keep on parking there for a week or so until His Excellency (tm) had the time to go down to the GDR office, rub shoulders with the proles, and get his proper permit....
They didn't see it his way
We didn't see it his way
And then, he apparently decided not to come GET the car until it was convenient for him. Two whole days AFTER the phone call. He was FLABBERGAST that we charged him $38 a day in storage for not just those, but ALL THE DAYS we had it since the 13th.
For 8 days on our side of the fence.
He came *this* close to whining about that, but stopped himself at the last possible second, drat, I was so hoping he'd dig that hole deeper. As he's already gone to a depth that usually is reserved for those in the petroleum exploration industry.... oh well, every good thing ends eventually they say.
And consider that Idiot Tax APPLIED, with gusto.
It's Pitch Black, You'll Probably be Eaten by a Grue
Another caller miffed at the fact her car was picked up during the great expired permit roundup of 2016.
So, between tow, ticket, storage and whatnot, she owed us about $434 to get her car back.
This didn't set well with her
But the real problem didn't start until she'd left, got home, and then called Helicopter Mom to provide CAS on our position, and strafe us repeatedly with her My-Widdlekins-Can-Do-No-Wrong cannons.
Poor poor Miss Sunshine, the office person who picked up the phone and ended up with THAT mess.
Why, don't we understand her widdlekins is just a poor poor college age girl?
And don't we know how UNFIAR It is to just tow her from some place she LIVES?!???
And don't we know how UNFAIR it is to expect her to have to follow the rules she signed her name to on the lease?
And don't we know how UNFAIR it is to tow someone for a permit that's only TWO WEEKS expired???
Miss Sunshine tried her hardest to impress upon Momsy that, well, seeing as her daughter was only one of about 20 people yanked that week for the same thing, it's kinda hard to see where this supposed "unfairness" happened.
Nope, Mommy was hearing none of it!!! We're all scammers and cheats and lowlifes and mean mean MEAN to her little angel, and we simply MUST reimburse her for SOME of our ill-gotten fees to be "fair".
I timed it, this went on and on and on for TWENTY MINUTES. Nineteen minutes and 44 seconds longer than it SHOULD have in an ideal world.
It got to the point where Miss Sunshine was physically holding the phone receiver at arms length away from her head and just letting Mommy yammer while she filled out payroll sheets, that's how one-sided things had gotten, but Mommy just wasn't getting the hint that her daughter was going to have to pay the same penalty as everyone else.
That's when I tapped Miss Sunshine ever so slightly on the shoulder and asked:
"Man, you just can't get her out can you? I mean, she's really fouling those pitches off left and right, wanna call the bullpen on this one and get the manager in here to induce a groundout?"
Sunshine laughed and her eyes lit up as the idea of passing her along to Towing Manager came to fruition, "Ma'm, would you like to talk to a manager?" YES! "Hold please"
Towing Manager, as you may remember, is like the Terminator, he feels no pity, no remorse, no regret, and will not stop, ever, until you're TOWED. And here comes Mommy.... right to his cold, metal grip.....
"Towing Manager"
"No"
"No"
"No, Ma'm"
"No"
"No, she has to follow the same rules as everyone else"
"No"
"No, it's not that I don't understand, it's that I don't agree"
"No, that wouldn't be fair to everyone else who was charged full price for the same thing."
"Consider this a valuable learning experience"
"What I'm saying is these charges are going to stand, goodbye"
Well, there's another 3 minutes sapped off his life he'll never get back, but I did congratulate him on at least getting rid of Mommy.
Me: Well, just couldn't believe we enforce the rules, huh?
TM: Not just that, but, she admits her kid had a permit for a couple weeks now but just never bothered to put it up in the car over the new one. Said her daughter didn't feel "comfortable" going outside at night to do it.
Me: She couldn't do it in the daytime?
TM: Apparently not
I know it's pretty early in the year, but that "it's too dark" excuse just might be the Most Pathetic Excuse For Getting Your Ass Towed (MPEFGYT) for all of 2016, hope the academy will keep it in mind when the voting comes around.
Out of Country Experience
Nope, not our fault you were out of the country when your permit expired.
Yes, I'm well aware that when you're about 10 time zones away, it's quite impossible to buy a new sticker and put that on your car.
You should have thought about that BEFORE you left
And I know you at least thought about it a little.
Because you put a car cover over the car, and even cut a tiny little hole in it so we could see you had a valid permit, thank you, by the way.... but, it expired at the end of 15' , says so RIGHT ON IT, and if you KNEW you weren't going to be back BEFORE then, well, why are you shocked this happened?
We even gave you an extra two days of warning labels stuck on the car before we towed it
We even contacted building maintenence, who confirmed you were out of country, and THEY said "tow it"
We really were as lenient as we could be and still enforce the law, but eventually the iron fist came down, and you felt it to the tune of over $500. No amount of velvet glove can cushion that blow completely....
Now, as Twitch starts backing under the car, there's a kid on the sidewalk adjacent with a cellphone out, talking to someone, and observing what's going on. Not saying anything to the driver, not waving his hands, just kinda, standing there, silently judging him, kinda like what my cat does to me all the time.
Just Plain Dumb
And, on the moron front, there was this guy. Who got his car ganked. He wanted it known that the signs informing him his car may be ganked were "substandard" and we should do something about it.
How so?
Well, the signs say:
And, per this, ahem, STUNNING example of evolution:
"It doesn't say WHO they're reserved FOR, I thought that meant I could use them"
*sigh*
Millions of years, TRILLIONS of deaths, working our way to the top of the food chain, and THIS is the reward? Really?
Predation needs to make a comeback.
FAST.
I don't think humanity can survive too many instances of HIM walking around freely.... with a projected lifespan of at least long enough to breed........
Had these almost back-to-back-to-back today, and keep in mind, these are people who just NOW are realizing (on the 21st) that they were towed on the 13th for permits that ran out on the 31st of LAST YEAR.
Just keep that in mind.
It's Not Fake (If You Have a Real One)
Well, this certainly takes some brass cojones You get towed for having a fake permit (well, 90% real, 10% fake, you changed the expiration date, crappily) and instead of coming to get the car, you whine to Global Domination Reality that you got towed for having a fake permit.
The same company that issues said permits
The same one you just committed FRAUD upon.
Well, okay, to your fleeting credit, you didn't tell them you had a FAKE permit, you left that part out, you told them that we at Friendly Neighborhood Towing had up and absconded with your vehicular conveyance illegally, because you had a permit.
This, of course, caused GDR to call us for our side of the story.
Which we told them, in Director's Cut version, not leaving out the part about the fake permit.
They then called you back and said "well duh, of course you're going to get towed for that"
You still seemed to think yourself the victim, to wit you said: "But I was going to come down to the office and get a new permit, I just didn't have the TIME!!!! I only changed the dates so I wouldn't be towed until I could get there"
Oh wait, you're serious aren't you? DEAR GOD NO, NO!!!! YOU'RE SERIOUS!?!??!!
Yep, he didn't see why he couldn't use a fake permit to keep on parking there for a week or so until His Excellency (tm) had the time to go down to the GDR office, rub shoulders with the proles, and get his proper permit....
They didn't see it his way
We didn't see it his way
And then, he apparently decided not to come GET the car until it was convenient for him. Two whole days AFTER the phone call. He was FLABBERGAST that we charged him $38 a day in storage for not just those, but ALL THE DAYS we had it since the 13th.
For 8 days on our side of the fence.
He came *this* close to whining about that, but stopped himself at the last possible second, drat, I was so hoping he'd dig that hole deeper. As he's already gone to a depth that usually is reserved for those in the petroleum exploration industry.... oh well, every good thing ends eventually they say.
And consider that Idiot Tax APPLIED, with gusto.
It's Pitch Black, You'll Probably be Eaten by a Grue
Another caller miffed at the fact her car was picked up during the great expired permit roundup of 2016.
So, between tow, ticket, storage and whatnot, she owed us about $434 to get her car back.
This didn't set well with her
But the real problem didn't start until she'd left, got home, and then called Helicopter Mom to provide CAS on our position, and strafe us repeatedly with her My-Widdlekins-Can-Do-No-Wrong cannons.
Poor poor Miss Sunshine, the office person who picked up the phone and ended up with THAT mess.
Why, don't we understand her widdlekins is just a poor poor college age girl?
And don't we know how UNFIAR It is to just tow her from some place she LIVES?!???
And don't we know how UNFAIR it is to expect her to have to follow the rules she signed her name to on the lease?
And don't we know how UNFAIR it is to tow someone for a permit that's only TWO WEEKS expired???
Miss Sunshine tried her hardest to impress upon Momsy that, well, seeing as her daughter was only one of about 20 people yanked that week for the same thing, it's kinda hard to see where this supposed "unfairness" happened.
Nope, Mommy was hearing none of it!!! We're all scammers and cheats and lowlifes and mean mean MEAN to her little angel, and we simply MUST reimburse her for SOME of our ill-gotten fees to be "fair".
I timed it, this went on and on and on for TWENTY MINUTES. Nineteen minutes and 44 seconds longer than it SHOULD have in an ideal world.
It got to the point where Miss Sunshine was physically holding the phone receiver at arms length away from her head and just letting Mommy yammer while she filled out payroll sheets, that's how one-sided things had gotten, but Mommy just wasn't getting the hint that her daughter was going to have to pay the same penalty as everyone else.
That's when I tapped Miss Sunshine ever so slightly on the shoulder and asked:
"Man, you just can't get her out can you? I mean, she's really fouling those pitches off left and right, wanna call the bullpen on this one and get the manager in here to induce a groundout?"
Sunshine laughed and her eyes lit up as the idea of passing her along to Towing Manager came to fruition, "Ma'm, would you like to talk to a manager?" YES! "Hold please"
Towing Manager, as you may remember, is like the Terminator, he feels no pity, no remorse, no regret, and will not stop, ever, until you're TOWED.
And here comes Mommy.... right to his cold, metal grip....."Towing Manager"
"No"
"No"
"No, Ma'm"
"No"
"No, she has to follow the same rules as everyone else"
"No"
"No, it's not that I don't understand, it's that I don't agree"
"No, that wouldn't be fair to everyone else who was charged full price for the same thing."
"Consider this a valuable learning experience"
"What I'm saying is these charges are going to stand, goodbye"
Well, there's another 3 minutes sapped off his life he'll never get back, but I did congratulate him on at least getting rid of Mommy.
Me: Well, just couldn't believe we enforce the rules, huh?
TM: Not just that, but, she admits her kid had a permit for a couple weeks now but just never bothered to put it up in the car over the new one. Said her daughter didn't feel "comfortable" going outside at night to do it.
Me: She couldn't do it in the daytime?
TM: Apparently not
I know it's pretty early in the year, but that "it's too dark" excuse just might be the Most Pathetic Excuse For Getting Your Ass Towed (MPEFGYT) for all of 2016, hope the academy will keep it in mind when the voting comes around.
Out of Country Experience
Nope, not our fault you were out of the country when your permit expired.
Yes, I'm well aware that when you're about 10 time zones away, it's quite impossible to buy a new sticker and put that on your car.
You should have thought about that BEFORE you left
And I know you at least thought about it a little.
Because you put a car cover over the car, and even cut a tiny little hole in it so we could see you had a valid permit, thank you, by the way.... but, it expired at the end of 15' , says so RIGHT ON IT, and if you KNEW you weren't going to be back BEFORE then, well, why are you shocked this happened?
We even gave you an extra two days of warning labels stuck on the car before we towed it
We even contacted building maintenence, who confirmed you were out of country, and THEY said "tow it"
We really were as lenient as we could be and still enforce the law, but eventually the iron fist came down, and you felt it to the tune of over $500. No amount of velvet glove can cushion that blow completely....
Now, as Twitch starts backing under the car, there's a kid on the sidewalk adjacent with a cellphone out, talking to someone, and observing what's going on. Not saying anything to the driver, not waving his hands, just kinda, standing there, silently judging him, kinda like what my cat does to me all the time.
Just Plain Dumb
And, on the moron front, there was this guy. Who got his car ganked. He wanted it known that the signs informing him his car may be ganked were "substandard" and we should do something about it.
How so?
Well, the signs say:
RESERVED PARKING 24/7
ALL OTHERS TOWED
FRIENDLY NEIGHBORHOOD TOWING
XXX-XXXX
ALL OTHERS TOWED
FRIENDLY NEIGHBORHOOD TOWING
XXX-XXXX
And, per this, ahem, STUNNING example of evolution:
"It doesn't say WHO they're reserved FOR, I thought that meant I could use them"
*sigh*
Millions of years, TRILLIONS of deaths, working our way to the top of the food chain, and THIS is the reward? Really?
Predation needs to make a comeback.
FAST.
I don't think humanity can survive too many instances of HIM walking around freely.... with a projected lifespan of at least long enough to breed........
), HDD shatter, and monitor go all Lite-Brightie.
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