I've heard it said that all families are dysfunctional to varying degrees, but it seems as if part of mine has walked off with the Oscar.
And people wonder WHY I don't have much contact with them . . .
My parents divorced years ago (nothing new - lots of families go through this.) I grew up with a younger brother w/developmental and intellectual differences (ie, mentally and developmentally challenged) and our Mom.
Dad, meanwhile, remarried in 1984 (two weeks before I turned 15) and our stepmom had also one previous marriage under her belt as well. Into that marriage she brought a daughter who had just turned 6 (this daughter is now 34 soon to be 35) and 3 years later, Dad and stepmom had a daughter of their own, who is now 25 (soon to be 26.)
Dingbat is the younger of the two (love her to death but she may have been a blonde in a former life.) The stepsister (who my Dad adopted a few years after he married her mom) we'll call Mud. If she had a Native American name, it would be Can't Keep Legs Closed.
Mud lives out of state and currently has 4 children. She met her hubby when both were in college and they dropped out when Mud got pregnant with the oldest child (my niece, who is now 15.) They moved out of state to live with his family (Dad and stepmom were livid that Mud got knocked up and wasn't married and hadn't finished college . . . yadda yadda yadda and has not helped with them one iota that I know of.)
Mud and the b/f married 2 years later (by this time, BIL had finished a degree in computers through a technical school and was working as a state employee doing IT work) then they had baby #2 (my oldest nephew, who is now 12.) Mud started back to college and went part time in between having the kids - two years later she was almost through with the first two years of college credits when she had baby #3 (middle nephew, who is now 9 1/2.)
After the third baby, she finished up her first two years and went to nursing school - which she graduated from in 2007 and is currently working at a hospital ED.
Two years ago she traveled w/a relief group to Haiti in the wake of the earthquake to help treat survivors. She was there for about a week and a half, working long hours in a makeshift clinic, then came home.
After this her life took a very strange tumble down the rabbit hole . . .
Next thing I hear from Dingbat (after trying to figure out what the Hell was being discussed on FB about a baby) I find out atThanksgiving that Mud is having baby #4 (the youngest nephew, who is now 2 years old.)
Thing is: #4 was NOT the BIL's b/c he had a a vasectomy after #3.
Mud ran into someone she went to school with, next thing Dingbat and the parents hear, she's kicked BIL out of the house (which really was insult to injury as he'd just been laid off from his state job due to budget cuts) and was cavorting around with this other dude. Needless to say, she got knocked up and while on a camping trip with her kids, the other guy, other guy's kid and other guy's parents (during which she noticed that Other Guy paid absolutely NO attention whatsoever to his own child the entire time and it was his parents who spent time during the kid's visits on his side of the family) that Other Guy wasn't daddy material, so she dumped him (with Dingbat telling her the whole time she was in a losing situation.) She talked BIL into coming back, he moves back in and puts his name on the baby's birth certificate after it's born.
Now, just when we're getting used to all of this I found out Sunday at the family gathering (we didn't get to have Christmas at Dad's this year - stepmom's parents are not in good health right now, so our Christmas was cancelled this year) that Mud is having baby #5 in March!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Now even though Mud and her family came in for the weekend (they left out yesterday) I didn't find this out from Mud herself, or the BIL . . . Dingbat was the one who told me.
You would think that Mud or her hubby would communicate more, but they really do not. I get no phone calls from them, hear nothing from them on FB - their kids have never once been to my home. It's as if they are on one side of a wall and I'm on the other.
But then with this family, it's probably better for me.
Anyways, I find this out from Dingbat . . . . all I can think of is who fathered this one and how stupid that BIL is to not only stay married to her (Dingbat says that Mud claims they have an "open marriage.") but to put up with this constant humiliation??????
He's just as sorry as she is in my book. And needless to say, I don't have any info on the behind the scenes family outbursts concerning Dad and stepmom's reaction (my understanding from Dingbat was they were pretty upset with Mud when she had the last baby - I can only imagine what they must have said on this one.)
Of course, it would be just unthinkable for Dad or stepmom to say, let me or my brother know what's going on with the family . . . but there again, they're probably too worried over what their church friends might think if they knew the truth. In their eyes, everything's normal . . . . yeah, suuuuuuuuuuuuuure it is.
And people wonder why I don't have much to do with my Dad's side. It was a minor blessing I didn't move in with them when I was in high school (considered it b/c the schools were way better where they live) or I'd have either went into the nuthouse or killed myself by now.
Am I the only one with screwed up family on the planet?
And people wonder WHY I don't have much contact with them . . .
My parents divorced years ago (nothing new - lots of families go through this.) I grew up with a younger brother w/developmental and intellectual differences (ie, mentally and developmentally challenged) and our Mom.
Dad, meanwhile, remarried in 1984 (two weeks before I turned 15) and our stepmom had also one previous marriage under her belt as well. Into that marriage she brought a daughter who had just turned 6 (this daughter is now 34 soon to be 35) and 3 years later, Dad and stepmom had a daughter of their own, who is now 25 (soon to be 26.)
Dingbat is the younger of the two (love her to death but she may have been a blonde in a former life.) The stepsister (who my Dad adopted a few years after he married her mom) we'll call Mud. If she had a Native American name, it would be Can't Keep Legs Closed.
Mud lives out of state and currently has 4 children. She met her hubby when both were in college and they dropped out when Mud got pregnant with the oldest child (my niece, who is now 15.) They moved out of state to live with his family (Dad and stepmom were livid that Mud got knocked up and wasn't married and hadn't finished college . . . yadda yadda yadda and has not helped with them one iota that I know of.)
Mud and the b/f married 2 years later (by this time, BIL had finished a degree in computers through a technical school and was working as a state employee doing IT work) then they had baby #2 (my oldest nephew, who is now 12.) Mud started back to college and went part time in between having the kids - two years later she was almost through with the first two years of college credits when she had baby #3 (middle nephew, who is now 9 1/2.)
After the third baby, she finished up her first two years and went to nursing school - which she graduated from in 2007 and is currently working at a hospital ED.
Two years ago she traveled w/a relief group to Haiti in the wake of the earthquake to help treat survivors. She was there for about a week and a half, working long hours in a makeshift clinic, then came home.
After this her life took a very strange tumble down the rabbit hole . . .
Next thing I hear from Dingbat (after trying to figure out what the Hell was being discussed on FB about a baby) I find out atThanksgiving that Mud is having baby #4 (the youngest nephew, who is now 2 years old.)
Thing is: #4 was NOT the BIL's b/c he had a a vasectomy after #3.
Mud ran into someone she went to school with, next thing Dingbat and the parents hear, she's kicked BIL out of the house (which really was insult to injury as he'd just been laid off from his state job due to budget cuts) and was cavorting around with this other dude. Needless to say, she got knocked up and while on a camping trip with her kids, the other guy, other guy's kid and other guy's parents (during which she noticed that Other Guy paid absolutely NO attention whatsoever to his own child the entire time and it was his parents who spent time during the kid's visits on his side of the family) that Other Guy wasn't daddy material, so she dumped him (with Dingbat telling her the whole time she was in a losing situation.) She talked BIL into coming back, he moves back in and puts his name on the baby's birth certificate after it's born.
Now, just when we're getting used to all of this I found out Sunday at the family gathering (we didn't get to have Christmas at Dad's this year - stepmom's parents are not in good health right now, so our Christmas was cancelled this year) that Mud is having baby #5 in March!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Now even though Mud and her family came in for the weekend (they left out yesterday) I didn't find this out from Mud herself, or the BIL . . . Dingbat was the one who told me.
You would think that Mud or her hubby would communicate more, but they really do not. I get no phone calls from them, hear nothing from them on FB - their kids have never once been to my home. It's as if they are on one side of a wall and I'm on the other.
But then with this family, it's probably better for me.
Anyways, I find this out from Dingbat . . . . all I can think of is who fathered this one and how stupid that BIL is to not only stay married to her (Dingbat says that Mud claims they have an "open marriage.") but to put up with this constant humiliation??????
He's just as sorry as she is in my book. And needless to say, I don't have any info on the behind the scenes family outbursts concerning Dad and stepmom's reaction (my understanding from Dingbat was they were pretty upset with Mud when she had the last baby - I can only imagine what they must have said on this one.)
Of course, it would be just unthinkable for Dad or stepmom to say, let me or my brother know what's going on with the family . . . but there again, they're probably too worried over what their church friends might think if they knew the truth. In their eyes, everything's normal . . . . yeah, suuuuuuuuuuuuuure it is.
And people wonder why I don't have much to do with my Dad's side. It was a minor blessing I didn't move in with them when I was in high school (considered it b/c the schools were way better where they live) or I'd have either went into the nuthouse or killed myself by now.
Am I the only one with screwed up family on the planet?
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