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Storytime!: Tell your shoplifting stories here

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  • #16
    My ex's friend used to steal small items from stores all the time. My ex would tell him, "just because you're blind doesn't mean everyone else is!" I don't know if clerks didn't notice because he was "looking" at things with his hands (because he was blind) and an item would occasionally "disappear" or if they just didn't think it was worth tackling a blind man over an item that was usually worth a dollar or less.
    "I look at the stars. It's a clear night and the Milky Way seems so near. That's where I'll be going soon. "We are all star stuff." I suddenly remember Delenn's line from Joe's script. Not a bad prospect. I am not afraid. In the meantime, let me close my eyes and sense the beauty around me. And take that breath under the dark sky full of stars. Breathe in. Breathe out. That's all."
    -Mira Furlan

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    • #17
      I have seen more canine shoplifters than I can count in my days of sitting at petbox during adoption days. For the most part, the miscreants are caught in the parking lot as their people open the car doors.

      As a general rule, people would come in to pay for whatever their dog had taken. Nothing was ever done if they didn't.

      The clerks weren't allowed to ask about what the dog had in their mouth. From what I understood, this was because the product was already ruined and it would embarrass their customers.

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      • #18
        This was many years ago. I was working in a Short Stop (a convenience store of the 7-11 type) and I had just handed the cash register over to the young man who was relieving me. I went to the back to do my paperwork, and heard clinking noises in the liquor section, which was in front of the door to the back. We had a two-way mirror, so I could clearly see a guy of about 18 shoving bottles of liquor into his zip-up jacket. So, I went out front, and told the cashier, "Cover me." I then confronted the customer, "Aren't you going to pay for what's in your jacket?" He insisted he had nothing in his jacket, so I knocked on his chest with my knuckles, and a clanking noise resulted. He quickly put the bottles on the floor and ran out the door. The store's policy was to not chase shoplifters out the door, so I didn't, but the cashier asked me, "How'd you know?" I pointed at the mirror.

        Not sure how I would have handled it if I'd been alone; probably just called him on it. On the other hand, the cashier was very busy and hadn't even noticed the guy was over in the liquor section.

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        • #19
          Years ago, I had a part time job at Jo Ann Fabrics as a cutter. We had a massive sale one Saturday, and it was crazy. So crazy that someone managed to walk out with a bolt of heavy velvet. Bolts of velvet were hung on a special heavy duty hanger, and resembled those huge body sized punching bags. Just lifting the hanger up from the rack would make you stagger, it was so heavy.

          And yet, someone walked out with one.

          I was glad that I was a cutter. I was nowhere near the front door (where check out was), and so they never bothered to question me as to whether I saw anything.
          To seek it with thimbles, to seek it with care;
          To pursue it with forks and hope;
          To threaten its life with a railway share;
          To charm it with forks and hope!

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          • #20
            The first time was when I did it myself. I used to go in to the grocery store with my dad, open up a bag of malted milk balls, and steal those. Was great until I got caught. The worst was the drive home with my Dad, knowing i was really going to get it. I don't know if I was in catholic school at the time, but when they teach you, "Thou shall not steal", i can imagine my Dad was pretty upset. That killed it for me. A year or two later they had video games in a side room available for customers to play. I was sheepish about going back but I think I even went up to the manager and said I was only going to be in that room from now on.

            Anywhoo I worked at a grocery store years later from 10th grade on. We had people steal stuff from time to time, but the two that stand out were the repeat offender that got caught with meat down his pants. Oh and he had stolen a couple steaks too (ba dum ching!). When I worked night turn there was a shopper that was apprehended from stealing stuff from the cash/lottery counter. Apparently he had stolen some condoms. While the cops were on there way, I was just coming back from lunch in the breakroom when i saw the commotion. The thief pointed ot me and said, "He said I could reach over and get it myself." I stated, "Uh, I'm just coming back from lunch. What's going on?" BUSTED!

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            • #21
              My most memorable shoplifting story from the swamp would have to be the kid who got busted for stealing a pack of seeds--because he wanted to put them in water, drink it and hallucinate.

              They ain't making them any smarter.
              Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.

              "I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost daily

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              • #22
                Quoth Irving Patrick Freleigh View Post
                ... put them in water, drink it and hallucinate...
                Heavenly Blue Morning Glory? They work. (testimony circa 1970 some close friends) Also the slimiest most disgusting thing they'd ever gagged down.
                I am not an a**hole. I am a hemorrhoid. I irritate a**holes!
                Procrastination: Forward planning to insure there is something to do tomorrow.
                Derails threads faster than a pocket nuke.

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                • #23
                  I decided to finish our basement and was looking at flooring options. I have a few hardwood stores near my office so I'd stop in to see what they had and they'd often hand me samples to take home. We weren't in a particular hurry to get it finished until we found we were having enough company that would require the downstairs bedroom. I figured I'd just go to the big box place right by the house. There were people in the dept but they were busy with other customers so I just grabbed a bunch of samples and headed home. I presented them to Momeo who said it was great to have such a variety to choose from but why did I buy so many?

                  O_o Buy?

                  She turns one over and shows me there's 99 cent price tag on the back of each of them.

                  I didn't 'fess up to the store but I did buy $1500 worth of flooring, trim and doors. Also, a compound miter saw... and a table saw.

                  I'm beginning to think that my projects are just excuses to buy more tools.

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                  • #24
                    Confession Time

                    I shoplifted .... once .... 32 years ago, and I still feel guilty about it.

                    I am/was a couponer. Not the extreme kind, but I will clip coupons for stuff I was going to buy anyway. If I have more than one coupon for a particular item, I'll compare the savings, choose the one that gives me the most cents off, and put the other one back in my purse.

                    So, this particular shopping trip, I had two coupons for a Good Seasons dry packet of salad dressing. This was the kind where you added oil and vinegar at home, it only had the herbs in a dry mix. I looked at both of the coupons, figured out which one would give me the best savings (the item was on sale). Picked up the packet of salad dressing, threw it in my cart (or so I thought), put the coupon I wasn't using back in my purse (or so I thought), held the applicable coupon in my hand with the others I was going to present to the cashier, and went on my merry shopping way.

                    When I got home, I unloaded my groceries and couldn't find the salad dressing packet! Unpacked all the groceries, it was no where to be found. So I reached into my purse to get the receipt, to see if maybe I hadn't paid for it. And guess what I found?? Yep, the salad dressing packet! I was so upset/guilty. I knew I had done wrong.

                    So I went back to the store with the salad dressing packet and my receipt, so that I could pay for what I had done. Went up the customer service desk, explained the situation and said I was here to pay. The customer service person was so confused, she called a manager. Manager listened to my story, laughed a bit, and said that since I was so honest, and it was (if I remember right) a 35 cent item, they would let it go this time. I appreciated that.

                    But, you know, to this day I feel guilty????

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                    • #25
                      I once bought two bags of kitty litter, and they were on the bottom rack of the basket. I was gabbing with the cashier about cats, and he forgot to charge me for the litter. When I went to the customer service desk to pay for it after I got outside, looked at my receipt, and noticed that I was never charged for the litter, the cashier at the customer service desk thanked me for coming back in to pay for it. She said, "Most people would have just considered it a freebie and gone home." Not me - if I purchase something, I pay for it, and if I notice that I haven't been charged for it I go back in and pay for it. Keeps my conscience clear.

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                      • #26
                        Quoth Irving Patrick Freleigh View Post
                        My most memorable shoplifting story from the swamp would have to be the kid who got busted for stealing a pack of seeds--because he wanted to put them in water, drink it and hallucinate.

                        They ain't making them any smarter.
                        One of my Bucket List items is to visit the Swamp now.

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                        • #27
                          Quoth Sparklyturtle View Post
                          I once bought two bags of kitty litter, and they were on the bottom rack of the basket. I was gabbing with the cashier about cats, and he forgot to charge me for the litter. When I went to the customer service desk to pay for it after I got outside, looked at my receipt, and noticed that I was never charged for the litter, the cashier at the customer service desk thanked me for coming back in to pay for it. She said, "Most people would have just considered it a freebie and gone home." Not me - if I purchase something, I pay for it, and if I notice that I haven't been charged for it I go back in and pay for it. Keeps my conscience clear.
                          Yeah, I've done stuff like that, and gone back to pay. My excuse is that if I went away with it, my mother would rise up out of her grave and haunt me for the rest of my days.
                          Yes, even for the $1.50 coupon that got read twice accidently.
                          My conscience is always clear.

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                          • #28
                            We helped our 3 year old shoplift a paint brush a few months ago. We were getting paint for a door and needed a paint brush. To keep the toddler quiet, we handed it to him to play with while we picked paint a few other things. Went and paid for what was in the cart and loaded kids and stuff in the truck. It wasn't until we got home and unloaded everything and were telling the kids how good they had been - no tantrums or anything - that we realized why. Toddler hadn't had a tantrum because we hadn't taken the brush from him to pay for it. We saved the package so we could pay for it next time we went, but haven't needed to go back to that store and it's a 20 minute trip each way, so a bit far to go. And now we've lost the package.

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                            • #29
                              Even as a young child I knew I shouldn't shoplift. But on one occasion I wanted a bottle of paste, but my mother said "no". So I slipped it into my pocket, slipped it onto the checkout counter and slipped back into my pocket after it was rung up. Unfortunately, I got caught when we got home and the paste was taken away.
                              "I don't have to be petty. The Universe does that for me."

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                              • #30
                                Not sure if this counts as shoplifting because it happened at a public library, but it's definitely one of the more memorable incidents that's taken place during my time there.


                                From what I remember, we'd been having major issues with DVDs being stolen, hold requests disappearing from their designated shelves, and it was suspected that one or more customers might be responsible. Then, when a few staff members had cash taken from their purses in the staff room, I remember that we started wondering about the people who worked for the carpet cleaners we used.

                                Eventually, management started suspecting "Sophie", our then-cleaning lady, as being the thief. This information was NOT shared with staff in my work area, so I don't know the details, only that I arrived at work one day to see "Sophie" in the manager's office, and I found out she'd been caught.

                                I remember that the stolen DVDs were recovered, and they were spread out on a table in the meeting room so that everything could be documented. I'm not sure what happened to "Sophie" after that, just that she'd managed to take a large amount of DVDS.

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