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  • Don't assume nobody can understand you if you're speaking a different language.

    My friend has just opened a resteraunt and she was a little short staffed. Knowing I need the money she asked if I wanted to come work for her for the day. Of course I said yes... The guilt trip she laid on had nothing to do with it I swear.

    Anyway, this group of 4 came in. Obviously tourists. Still have their luggage with them and everything. I sit them at the table. Go through the regular spiel and inform them a waitress will be there to take their drink orders soon. I also take note of their accent as its a game I play in my head trying to match accents to places. I also know a few languages so if I get the opportunity to use them it's always a bonus.

    Anyway. The waitress is one whose rather young and she has a speech impediment which makes her stutter. I think it's one of her first jobs or something. While she comes back upset and so I ask her what happened. She told me that she had tried to take their drink order and one of them had looked her in the eye and told her something in their language and they all had a laugh about it. She didn't know what they had said but she understood the tone. I asked her to repeat it to me and she tried. I repeated back to her what I thought they said given her butcher job at the language. She confirmed what they had said was du är så jävla störd (you are so disturbed/retarded) or at least that's the translation I know of.

    So I get pissed because I know enough Swedish to hold a conversation if I have to. (Not a very interesting one mind you) and I, like almost everyone else, learned the swears first because I'm mature like that.

    So I tell her I'll take over for her if she does hostess duties. (We were really slow at the time)

    So I go up to them and say.

    "Hello. I recognized your accent. Do you mind if I practice my language skills? There aren't many Swedish speakers here so I haven't had as much practice at the beautiful language." I was definitely banking on the pride most tourists have in their language and country. Also... It's true, and I like the language even if it makes my tongue twist into knots trying to pronounce some words (I know your out to get me vowels)

    They give me the go ahead. So I give them the standard speech.
    Hej, trevligt att träffas. (Hello, nice to meet you.)
    Mitt namn är Heather (My name is Heather)
    Jag kommer att vara din server. (I will be your server today)
    Vill du ha något att dricka? (Can I get you anything to drink) [i don't know how to say "can I start you with...?" But I know "can I get you...?"]

    We have conversations over the course of their meal.

    They ask how long I've been learning and I reply with
    Jag har fått lära mig svenska i ett månad (I have been learning Swedish about a month. Which is technically true in that I only have a month's worth of learning. I just learned that 'month' years ago. Because when begging for help on your 'project Viking' from some Swedish boat makers who don't speak much English...though they can read/write it pretty well... It is best to approach them in their own language. Shows your putting forth the effort and even if your pronunciation is terrible they still appreciate it. Also, Swedes are awesome and all the ones, except these customers, I've talked to have been really nice/helpful.)

    They correct me (often on my pronunciation. Those vowels hate me.) and leave a nice fat tourist tip ($100).

    A lot of European countries don't tip their waiters/waitresses (I'll admit I was totally banking on this) On the bright side, or so I've found, the kind of tourists that insult someone in their language while that someone is standing right there are generally the ones who don't understand what a normal tip amount would be. So I got a tip that was way more then it should be (and couldn't seem to be bothered to tell them that.) and gave it to the other waitress (my tip was the revenge I got by squeezing more then they probably would have given if they hadn't 'enjoyed helping me learn their wonderful language' and then giving it to the very person they didn't think was worth much in their eyes. Personally I think they liked a combination of 'I want to learn your language your awesome for helping me-' and being able to point out my mistakes. There's no masculine/feminine way of saying a word in English and that always confuses me no matter which language I learn)

    Yes, I'm subtle when I want to be and I can be a vindictive bitch. It was all the more amusing that they didn't know what I did with their tip... At least to me anyway.

    I need to get a handle on my 'authority issues' and my 'vindictive tendencies'... Well at least I have something to do tomorrow.

    Also. If anyone wants to help me develop my language skills... I speak Italian, Spanish(Spain), Japanese(though I'm no longer fluent as I haven't really used it in like 10yrs) Swedish (not much but then there's nobody to teach me here so I have to rely on webcam chats with people) and a bit of Arabic and Turkish (written not the spoken part... Though if anyone wants to help expand that feel free).
    Don’t worry about what I’m up to. Worry about why you are worried about what I’m up to.

  • #2
    Japanese(though I'm no longer fluent as I haven't really used it in like 10yrs)
    Watashi mō. It's been too damn long. Saikin, watashi no Nihongo wa sucks desu v_v My Spanish is no better -- tho I can still pronounce them (and use accents, as applicable) both of them properly if I see them written down in romaji.
    "For a musician, the SNES sound engine is like using Crayola Crayons. Nobuo Uematsu used Crayola Crayons to paint the Sistine Chapel." - Jeremy Jahns (re: "Dancing Mad")
    "The difference between an amateur and a master is that the master has failed way more times." - JoCat
    "Thinking is difficult, therefore let the herd pronounce judgment!" ~ Carl Jung
    "There's burning bridges, and then there's the lake just to fill it with gasoline." - Wiccy, reddit
    "Retail is a cruel master, and could very well be the most educational time of many people's lives, in its own twisted way." - me
    "Love keeps her in the air when she oughta fall down...tell you she's hurtin' 'fore she keens...makes her a home." - Capt. Malcolm Reynolds, "Serenity" (2005)
    Acts of Gord – Read it, Learn it, Love it!
    "Our psychic powers only work if the customer has a mind to read." - me

    Comment


    • #3
      Quoth AkaiKitsune View Post

      I need to get a handle on my 'authority issues' and my 'vindictive tendencies'... Well at least I have something to do tomorrow.
      If this story is an example of your usual "vindictive tendencies" ... you do NOT have to "get a handle" on them! That was brilliant!

      I studied German and Russian, and would love to practice both, but I have sadly lost almost all my German and definitely all my Russian.
      Customer service: More efficient than a Dementor's kiss
      ~ Mr Hero

      Comment


      • #4
        Can I try out my French?

        "You're an asshole. Pardon my French."
        Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.

        "I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost daily

        Comment


        • #5
          Quoth Pixelated View Post
          If this story is an example of your usual "vindictive tendencies" ... you do NOT have to "get a handle" on them! That was brilliant!
          Honey, I spent 4 years of my life and roped nearly my entire school into helping build a Viking Longship all because my history teacher claimed that other cultures weren't worth studying and that they were all a bunch of barbarians anyway. Then we took said ship and raided the teacher's end of year beach party that they had every year. (Hence learning Swedish. We didn't know what we were doing so we needed to contact someone who did and wouldn't just laugh at us.) never give alcohol to people ranging 10-13 yrs old.... Also... I think we scared the crap out of the museum workers when they opened a temp Viking exhibit and we descended on them en masse. But we were an organized mass... And we all gained an appreciation of craftsmanship and an extreme dislike for oak. Turns out that stores won't sell power tools to people that young without an adult present (no way we were going to have a responsible adult ruin our fun) we did manage one of those hand held drills borrowed from a classmates father. We even had permission though I don't think he realized what we were building.

          I also got kicked out of one of my schools for 'demonstrating French revolutionary tactics' at least that's what I'm calling it. (I think they termed it 'starting a riot') Teacher asked a question and I answered it. If she had wanted a verbal response rather then a physical one she should have said... And perhaps laid off the racial slurs on my fellow classmates. It's not a revolution if only one person joins. I would have had a harder time recruiting if she hadn't been so bitchy.

          Oh and I recently got a standing ovation from my fellow classmates. I was in the advanced English class in university... They made us read a picture book. I mean a literal full picture and one sentence per page picture book. So when the teacher made an unfortunate word choice in the assignment ("why do you think we read this book. Give examples") I decided that the reason we read such a stupid simple book was the failing school system and the schoolboard's resistance to updating their curriculum. Not to mention the policy of pushing people through even if they failed the class miserably instead of holding them back a year. Then I found out it was to be given verbally in front of the class instead of just handed in. (That's what I get for not reading everything) so I went with it. Best part was that the teacher had to give me a decent mark because she was essentially asking our opinion of why we read it. The schoolboard had to discuss it and everything. Technically I did the assignment.

          So yeah... Authority issues and self restraint issues. Also, I just can't do simple stuff. I seem to be an all or nothing kind of person. I'm also very persuasive when I want to be. Project Viking got me kicked out of that school(not that I cared because I was in my last year for that school anyway) and blacklisted from a few others. Though telling the teacher that it was her fault for telling me I should 'do something constructive' for once. Probably didn't help.

          I've merely learned to be more subtle about it since having a job is rather necessary for survival. I can't live off my parents money at this age.

          I studied German and Russian, and would love to practice both, but I have sadly lost almost all my German and definitely all my Russian.
          My great grandma was fluent in Russian. I always found it amazing when she would talk on the phone with her Russian speaking friends. She would be talking a mile a minute.

          Erickei
          My Japanese isn't much better anymore. I tried to write out the hiragana table a couple days ago much to my Chinese coworker's amusement. I got most of it. Still suck at kanji and the only katakana I can remember is my name and table. I can still read though. I've been ordering manga with the original japanse to keep up with it. It helps that one of my friends got an adult job and became a Japanese language teacher.
          Don’t worry about what I’m up to. Worry about why you are worried about what I’m up to.

          Comment


          • #6
            Nice. Friend of mine went to Japan years ago to teach English and simply never came back He keeps trying to get me to come over for a visit, but, alas, I lack the nuyen, chummer.

            As for manga -- That is a good source, just watch out for the terminology/politeness level at times, especially for works aimed at teens. IIRC, many of them tend to be written more or less in "Plain Form" politeness level (e.g. "Boku ...da" instead of "Watashi...desu") -- Tho, that's still worlds better than my last decade's worth of Japanese "study," which amounted to hanging out with Japanese players in FFXI (when I still played it).
            "For a musician, the SNES sound engine is like using Crayola Crayons. Nobuo Uematsu used Crayola Crayons to paint the Sistine Chapel." - Jeremy Jahns (re: "Dancing Mad")
            "The difference between an amateur and a master is that the master has failed way more times." - JoCat
            "Thinking is difficult, therefore let the herd pronounce judgment!" ~ Carl Jung
            "There's burning bridges, and then there's the lake just to fill it with gasoline." - Wiccy, reddit
            "Retail is a cruel master, and could very well be the most educational time of many people's lives, in its own twisted way." - me
            "Love keeps her in the air when she oughta fall down...tell you she's hurtin' 'fore she keens...makes her a home." - Capt. Malcolm Reynolds, "Serenity" (2005)
            Acts of Gord – Read it, Learn it, Love it!
            "Our psychic powers only work if the customer has a mind to read." - me

            Comment


            • #7
              Quoth EricKei View Post
              As for manga -- That is a good source, just watch out for the terminology/politeness level at times, especially for works aimed at teens. IIRC, many of them tend to be written more or less in "Plain Form" politeness level (e.g. "Boku ...da" instead of "Watashi...desu")
              Yeah, I read everything from manga geared towards teens to ones that are ahem, more adult geared (get your mind out of the gutter, not what I meant) another thing to watch for is regional dialects. For instance, in the standard Tokyo-ben, "baka" is just stupid and a mild or even playful insult depending on context. In Kansai-ben dialect it's considered a huge insult. The equivalent to the Tokyo-ben's version of "baka" is "aho" in Kansai-ben. Also... If you think Japanese is hard to write at least the characters regardless of how their arranged to form a word remain drawn the same. Arabic, depending on the character proceeding it and the one after it can change how the middle character looks completely... It's like handwriting... Backwards... And more pretty then any handwriting in the English language. And the smallest misplaced dot can completely change the meaning of the entire freaking sentence. As I found out the hard way....
              Don’t worry about what I’m up to. Worry about why you are worried about what I’m up to.

              Comment


              • #8
                Quoth AkaiKitsune View Post
                And the smallest misplaced dot can completely change the meaning of the entire freaking sentence. As I found out the hard way....
                Oooooh!! Story??

                Pleeeeeeeeease? *blinks eyes imploringly*
                “There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old’s life: The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged.
                One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world.
                The other, of course, involves orcs." -- John Rogers

                Comment


                • #9
                  Yo el speako poquito spanisho.

                  Puedo hablar un poquito espanol.

                  I used to know some Czech swears, too (Czech background). I wouldn't mind learning other languages. I tried learning more Czech at one point, but the only thing I really retained was something that sounds an awful lot like "spicy butt".

                  I'd really like to learn more Latin, brush up on my Spanish, and maybe learn some Japanese and Mandarin.
                  Skilled programmers aren't cheap. Cheap programmers aren't skilled.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Quoth AkaiKitsune View Post
                    ... And the smallest misplaced dot can completely change the meaning of the entire freaking sentence....
                    That's not what I wrote! Some fly did his dirty there!
                    I am not an a**hole. I am a hemorrhoid. I irritate a**holes!
                    Procrastination: Forward planning to insure there is something to do tomorrow.
                    Derails threads faster than a pocket nuke.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      You say you need to get your vindictive tendencies under control. Perhaps the first step would be to not call yourself a kitsune?

                      Not that I don't know that feel - though with bosses, rather than customers. Obnoxious customers, I can handle, as long as they don't get the bosses to side with them against me. Obnoxious bosses, that's different, and even once you're off the clock, and know you won't be seeing them again for five days because of the way the schedule worked out, it can be very difficult to disconnect and stop thinking angry thoughts about them.
                      Just stay out of the "workplace memes" thread. Please. I mean it.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Quoth Shotgun Chuck View Post
                        Not that I don't know that feel - though with bosses, rather than customers. Obnoxious customers, I can handle, as long as they don't get the bosses to side with them against me. Obnoxious bosses, that's different, and even once you're off the clock, and know you won't be seeing them again for five days because of the way the schedule worked out, it can be very difficult to disconnect and stop thinking angry thoughts about them.

                        Sounds like there's a story there
                        Don’t worry about what I’m up to. Worry about why you are worried about what I’m up to.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Quoth AkaiKitsune View Post
                          ... Teacher asked a question and I answered it...
                          Sir Terry has a definition: "Attention Surplus Syndrome".
                          I am not an a**hole. I am a hemorrhoid. I irritate a**holes!
                          Procrastination: Forward planning to insure there is something to do tomorrow.
                          Derails threads faster than a pocket nuke.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            I spent 3 years in Japan as a toddler. I can still count in Japanese, but that's about it. My toddler years were around 50 years ago, so I think I'm doing well to remember that much. I also can remember how to ask to use the telephone. I have a vivid memory of my mother haggling with the Japanese storekeepers near where we lived - Mom didn't speak Japanese, they didn't speak English, but money is universal.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Quoth AkaiKitsune View Post
                              Sounds like there's a story there
                              Ohhhhhhh yes. Yes there is.

                              You see, at CrazyBurger we have this new assistant manager. He's not the most agreeable - he's memorized the entire freaking rulebook, and he expects the same of everyone else. He says things like "You're paid to follow policy, you're not paid to think." He thinks yelling and finger-snapping and threatening to dock hours is motivational. He has no tolerance, no mercy, no empathy.

                              He's also the franchise company owners' son.



                              He was even worse than usual yesterday. We had a corporate inspection recently (again), so I'm guessing what happened is his parents came to see him and tell him that he needs to get all the ridiculous little cleaning tasks done all the time, and still meet the tight speed targets, and all without using any more payroll. Then he comes and takes it out on his employees because he's got no other options and wants to do his family proud anyway.

                              I get that we weren't particularly fast before, and that there are changes that can be made to improve efficiency. However, the way you make those changes is with patience and kindness, not by coming in both fists swinging, demanding that things suddenly change from the way they've been done for months or years, and yelling and screaming and writing people up when they don't change quickly enough.
                              Just stay out of the "workplace memes" thread. Please. I mean it.

                              Comment

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