Retail superpowers

[Draper Mel]

Ok, my reply in this thread made me think this would be a fun add on thread.

What superpowers do customers seem to expect retail workers to have?

My comment was instant cloning. So you can help every customer who comes up to you all at the same time.

[Flying Grype]

Making more of what there's none of left.

Okay, I can make a pot of coffee if we're out of coffee. But if there's no curry left I can't make more curry. The boss won't even tell anyone the recipe for less than a million dollars.

Somehow all restaurant workers who are not the chef are supposed to absorb the chef's cooking knowledge and skill so that they can make all the same stuff he does. Or they're supposed to... excrete... the food. I dunno.

[Marmalady]

Mind reading.

So when they come up to us and say that they want one of those things, you know, the little round things that fit over the other bit.... "You used to have them, I know you did, I got my last one from here!" - we will know instantly what they mean....

[Not Lillith]

To know the exact location, at all times, of the 40,000+ items carried in the Warehouse sized store. (and, if we are out, the exact date and time it will arrive from the DC and be stocked on the shelf)

To know the item #/barcode of all above said items based solely on it's price point.

[Catwoman2965]

The ability to make something, that already comes in 17 colors, in the one color they want, but doesn't come it.

And the ability to know when a customer says they want that pink flowered sweater in the new catalog, they really mean the navy and red paisley.

[Kristev]

Isn't that what paint is for?

[TheSHAD0W]

You know this thread is futile. Should anyone here actually develop these superpowers, the SCs will eat it all up and complain all the louder.

[XCashier]

You know this thread is futile. Should anyone here actually develop these superpowers, the SCs will eat it all up and complain all the louder.

Yep. We're supposed to have all these godlike powers and knowledge, yet accept being treated like scum and working for minimum wage. Go figure.

[Gizmo]

-To have a borg like memory of all the conversations they've had with my work colleagues ever. "What do I mean I didn't know they had X problem? They told {person in completely other department}?"

- To not mind that they still try to contact the two people who left 2ish years ago despite the fact we have told them multiple times this is the case. Its worst when they reply to an email from me and say "hello A" as if that ex-employee was the one emailing them!

[Divra]

Super-speed, so that everything can happen THERE AND THEN. Exactly. Preferably before they stop talking.

[dragon_wings]

Super-speed, so that everything can happen THERE AND THEN. Exactly. Preferably before they stop talking.

Ah but that would require a bit of precogn and telepathy as well.

[BrenDAnn]

The ability to produce any item they want out of thin air, immediately, or to have a magical back room that does so. I'm shocked no one said that yet!

[CrazedClerkthe2nd]

The ability to completely memorize the EXACT shipping schedule and arrival time for EVERY SINGLE PRODUCT YOU SELL.

Also, the knowledge of what EVERY COMPANY was thinking when they made design changes to their products.