After a while, the same basic question, that you've explained 300+ times, makes you head hurt, and your brain scream to answer the first thought in your head. Well, I wrote mine down.
What do you have breakfast?
Bagels, waffles, cereal, coffee, tea, juice, milk and muffins.
No butter, or cream cheese?
Well, yes. I’m sorry, I was assuming you’d understand, we offer the basics.
How late is that grocery store open?
Do you see cars? Hmm. then I’d assume they’re closed!
Where can I get food?
At.. the butt crack of dawn? Anywhere if you can drive.*As I’m explaining the cash policy* You must pay 50 dollars extra if you’re paying me cash. It’s my policy. “But I don’t want to pay it and you can just waive it.”
Or.. you can give me the fifty dollars and have a room. No deposit, no room. Simple as that.
HI, I’m calling for your weekly rate.
367.92
Is that without tax?
That’s total.
“What is it total.”
367.92. *Headdesk*
*Pushes orange juice button, no juice comes out* “You’re out of juice.”
No.. no. It’s not time for breakfast. Not gonna bother starting it.
I paid for my room I want juice! The customer is always right.
No.. not always. And You aren’t getting any damn juice. Go back to your room and shut the fuck up.
Do you have any rooms?
No, sorry I’m sold out.
Why?
Cause.. people thought ahead and reserved their rooms rather driving cross country with no real secured place of rest?
What’s going on in (small town here) that YOUR’RE full.
Real life. It happens. Why are YOU here?
Give me a room for 30 bucks and wave that 50 dollar cash fee for me.
Again, after tax, you’d still not have paid for the shower and phone bill, or the cleaning shit we’d need to get your i’m-gonna-smoke-in-a-non-smoking self out of our hotel. Oh and that cash fee, stays. Pay up.
What kinds of beds do you have?
King or queen.
What’s the difference?
Between the beds? Size. Between us? A brain, that I seem to have and you don’t.
*A potential guest has sent in her fourteen year old daughter, and when I send the child away, she gets angry, saying I was rude to children and the child was getting the room for her.*
Here, let me make this easy for you. I don’t know that the child actually HAS an adult with her. So I say no. I’m not renting to ANY underage children. As such, you need to be over 21. I’m sorry I inconvenienced you, but too bad. And I am not rude to children, I only told your daughter she needed to have an adult, I couldn’t rent to her alone.
*A guest isn’t getting their way, by complaining about something I can’t fix (Rate, machine not working..it can be anything). The next thing that comes from their mouth is “I’ll have your job.”
Ask really, REALLY nicely and I may share. You do the work, and I’ll get the paycheck. Let’s see if you like putting up with assholes like yourself! I don’t get paid enough for this!
What do you have breakfast?
Bagels, waffles, cereal, coffee, tea, juice, milk and muffins.
No butter, or cream cheese?
Well, yes. I’m sorry, I was assuming you’d understand, we offer the basics.
How late is that grocery store open?
Do you see cars? Hmm. then I’d assume they’re closed!
Where can I get food?
At.. the butt crack of dawn? Anywhere if you can drive.*As I’m explaining the cash policy* You must pay 50 dollars extra if you’re paying me cash. It’s my policy. “But I don’t want to pay it and you can just waive it.”
Or.. you can give me the fifty dollars and have a room. No deposit, no room. Simple as that.
HI, I’m calling for your weekly rate.
367.92
Is that without tax?
That’s total.
“What is it total.”
367.92. *Headdesk*
*Pushes orange juice button, no juice comes out* “You’re out of juice.”
No.. no. It’s not time for breakfast. Not gonna bother starting it.
I paid for my room I want juice! The customer is always right.
No.. not always. And You aren’t getting any damn juice. Go back to your room and shut the fuck up.
Do you have any rooms?
No, sorry I’m sold out.
Why?
Cause.. people thought ahead and reserved their rooms rather driving cross country with no real secured place of rest?
What’s going on in (small town here) that YOUR’RE full.
Real life. It happens. Why are YOU here?
Give me a room for 30 bucks and wave that 50 dollar cash fee for me.
Again, after tax, you’d still not have paid for the shower and phone bill, or the cleaning shit we’d need to get your i’m-gonna-smoke-in-a-non-smoking self out of our hotel. Oh and that cash fee, stays. Pay up.
What kinds of beds do you have?
King or queen.
What’s the difference?
Between the beds? Size. Between us? A brain, that I seem to have and you don’t.
*A potential guest has sent in her fourteen year old daughter, and when I send the child away, she gets angry, saying I was rude to children and the child was getting the room for her.*
Here, let me make this easy for you. I don’t know that the child actually HAS an adult with her. So I say no. I’m not renting to ANY underage children. As such, you need to be over 21. I’m sorry I inconvenienced you, but too bad. And I am not rude to children, I only told your daughter she needed to have an adult, I couldn’t rent to her alone.
*A guest isn’t getting their way, by complaining about something I can’t fix (Rate, machine not working..it can be anything). The next thing that comes from their mouth is “I’ll have your job.”
Ask really, REALLY nicely and I may share. You do the work, and I’ll get the paycheck. Let’s see if you like putting up with assholes like yourself! I don’t get paid enough for this!
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