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Warning: It got long again
I said my previous post would be my last for a while, but things have gotten insanely stupid. For those who don't know, I'm the Director of Visitor Information (ie. Info Girl) for a small convention here in the south. It's my second year as Director, and approaching my third con as Info Girl. People are starting to figure out that I'm available to ask questions to. Thing is, I still get the same 1-2 e-mails a month related to my job. The other 2-3 (and increasing) a week are, well...
(Admittedly, some of these usually come from the forums and not my work e-mail.)
Code:
Q: question (or statement or words sent in my direction)
----------------------------------
Information =/= Programming
----------------------------------
Q: Can you get (guest)? I absolutely love him! I'm his biggest fan!
I'm sure you are. Let me just remove him from the storage space in which we keep every VA, webcomic artist, and wig/prop/costume maker ever. Have fun raping him in the corner or whatever the hell it is you people do.
Here's an idea: Why didn't you accost him at the 3-5 other events where we had him? Everyone else is sick of him now, so we're trying something new.
Q: Can you get me voice actors from (short anime series so unknown that even Google can barely tell me anything)?
While I'm sure their souls are on the dollar menu at McVoiceActors, we really have no interest in accommodating guests no one else gives a (worthless item) about. Even if they paid us for the exposure.
And "get you"? Way to be selfish, Muffy. This is a 4k con; we can't afford to feed your obscure desires at the cost of more popular items.
Q: Oh, is it possible for you guys to have (guest from blockbuster movie or popular TV series)?
No, not really. That's what DragonCon is for. I mean, we could probably get them if you paid what we're worth instead of the $15-45 we actually charge you, but somehow I doubt you're willing to agree to that comprise.
Q: (Guest)(Guest)(Guest)(Guest)(Guest)(Guest)(Guest)( Guest)(Guest)(Guest)(Guest)(Guest)(Guest)(Guest)(G uest)(Guest)(Guest)(Guest)(Guest)(Guest)(Guest)(Gu est)(Guest)(Guest)(Guest)(Guest)(Guest)!
There is a whole thread on the forum for this. It's stickied and everything...
---------------------------
More fun with guests
---------------------------
Q: I can't find the guest list! Who's going to be there? Your site is not very informative.
For the love of all that is holy and just... THE CONVENTION IS IN APRIL! You're lucky we don't still have last year's info up.
Q: Will you guys have (character) as a guest?
Sure! Just let me just get out my wand and transform into a skimpy outfit via sparkles and magic, and then I'll be ready to cast the necessary spells.
Okay, I know this is a hard concept for you to wrap your tiny brain around, so I'll help you out. Let's do it together! I'll even hold your hand. Wait, no, wash your hand first. Okay, are you ready? Alright, now listen. Anime? Well, there's something that it's not. That thing is reality. Say it with me now: "Anime is not real." Make it your mantra. Say it over and over until it sinks in.
The tears mean it's working.
------------------------
Just plain stupid
------------------------
Q: The late night hentai was way overcrowded, and I nearly fell asleep. Why can't you have it in the main room at a time when everyone's awake?
Because we're a family convention. I believe what you are looking for is a porn con. Anime and hentai ARE NOT INTERCHANGEABLE. You are lucky we have anything at all. Also, I hate you.
Q: I really want to go to your con. Can you fly me in from Ohio?
Ohio has more anime conventions than museums. In fact, our sister con is up there. So no. You have even less of a chance of us personally providing you with transport than everyone else. Everyone else's chances are about as good as Frosty's chance of surviving a vacation in hell.
Which makes your score -30958902480938%
Q: I can't afford to pay $15-45 for a three day convention with a completely full program. Are there any discounts?
No. Try selling your dollfie. Hell, that should be enough money to pay for ten years of college.
... Please don't ask me to explain what college is.
Q: It's awfully inconvenient to travel half an hour to your location. Can't you hold the con in my backyard?
Sure, I'll just do the whole magical-girl transformation thing again, and warp the convention to defy space, time, and finances. That way, everyone ever can go to it whenever they want, where-ever they want, FOR FREE.
(I never get these from people 3+ hours away or out of state. It's always people who have to drive further just to get to a mall.)
Q: When is the convention?
How in the hell did you manage to find the e-mail for the proper person to send this question, and yet entirely miss the whole first page of the website?
-------------
Creepy
-------------
Q: Can I have your IM?
Do you need additional information on what we were discussing?
Q: No, but I really like talking to you.
My IMs are connected to personal e-mail accounts. Please PM me on the forums or e-mail me at information @ con.dur. I check both at least 3-5 times a day.
And then I never hear from her again. It's always females, too.
Q: Marry me?
Buy me hand-made Jfashion clothes and pay my tuition?
Q: Hey baby-
No.
---------------------------------------------------------------
What part of "That's not my job" can you not understand?
---------------------------------------------------------------
Yesterday afternoon I get an e-mail from our Director of Dealers asking me for the list of dealers who have paid for tables, how many tables they paid for, and their contact info. I politely reply that she accidentally sent the e-mail to me, and "They don't really tell me that stuff." This was like 2pm. I hear nothing from DoD and assume the matter has been taken care of.
Now, it should be noted that all staff members are required to use a standard signature in all con-related e-mail and even on the forum. This means that she not only addressed a message to information @ con.dur and got a reply from information @ con.dur, but said reply had, two lines bellow my text,: "Napoleana Rabotte; Director of Visitor Information; information @ con.dur; Convention Name; http://con.dur"
So, seeing as how I'm the Director of Visitor Information, I really don't have to help directors, do I? But I will, because I am nice like that.
This morning (and this was the morning when I have to wake up super early, too), I get e-mail from DoD full of bitching that she "was told" it was my job to "keep track of the money." Riiight. The Director for Visitor Information keeps track of the money. Always a good idea to title me something entirely different than what my job is.
She then goes on to whine about how (Director of DoD) gave her a list that she is suspicious of, and she really wants to know what I have, and this is kind of important, wah wah wah... You get the idea.
I reply back with a FULL description of exactly what my job entails, then tell her that she is looking for the Senior Director of Revenue, Napoleona Smith, at revenue @ con.dur
You're a director now, sweetheart. Buy a clue.
---
Oy, that's all. No more. It's long enough as it is.
I said my previous post would be my last for a while, but things have gotten insanely stupid. For those who don't know, I'm the Director of Visitor Information (ie. Info Girl) for a small convention here in the south. It's my second year as Director, and approaching my third con as Info Girl. People are starting to figure out that I'm available to ask questions to. Thing is, I still get the same 1-2 e-mails a month related to my job. The other 2-3 (and increasing) a week are, well...
(Admittedly, some of these usually come from the forums and not my work e-mail.)
Code:
Q: question (or statement or words sent in my direction)
----------------------------------
Information =/= Programming
----------------------------------
Q: Can you get (guest)? I absolutely love him! I'm his biggest fan!
I'm sure you are. Let me just remove him from the storage space in which we keep every VA, webcomic artist, and wig/prop/costume maker ever. Have fun raping him in the corner or whatever the hell it is you people do.
Here's an idea: Why didn't you accost him at the 3-5 other events where we had him? Everyone else is sick of him now, so we're trying something new.
Q: Can you get me voice actors from (short anime series so unknown that even Google can barely tell me anything)?
While I'm sure their souls are on the dollar menu at McVoiceActors, we really have no interest in accommodating guests no one else gives a (worthless item) about. Even if they paid us for the exposure.
And "get you"? Way to be selfish, Muffy. This is a 4k con; we can't afford to feed your obscure desires at the cost of more popular items.
Q: Oh, is it possible for you guys to have (guest from blockbuster movie or popular TV series)?
No, not really. That's what DragonCon is for. I mean, we could probably get them if you paid what we're worth instead of the $15-45 we actually charge you, but somehow I doubt you're willing to agree to that comprise.
Q: (Guest)(Guest)(Guest)(Guest)(Guest)(Guest)(Guest)( Guest)(Guest)(Guest)(Guest)(Guest)(Guest)(Guest)(G uest)(Guest)(Guest)(Guest)(Guest)(Guest)(Guest)(Gu est)(Guest)(Guest)(Guest)(Guest)(Guest)!
There is a whole thread on the forum for this. It's stickied and everything...
---------------------------
More fun with guests
---------------------------
Q: I can't find the guest list! Who's going to be there? Your site is not very informative.
For the love of all that is holy and just... THE CONVENTION IS IN APRIL! You're lucky we don't still have last year's info up.
Q: Will you guys have (character) as a guest?
Sure! Just let me just get out my wand and transform into a skimpy outfit via sparkles and magic, and then I'll be ready to cast the necessary spells.
Okay, I know this is a hard concept for you to wrap your tiny brain around, so I'll help you out. Let's do it together! I'll even hold your hand. Wait, no, wash your hand first. Okay, are you ready? Alright, now listen. Anime? Well, there's something that it's not. That thing is reality. Say it with me now: "Anime is not real." Make it your mantra. Say it over and over until it sinks in.
The tears mean it's working.
------------------------
Just plain stupid
------------------------
Q: The late night hentai was way overcrowded, and I nearly fell asleep. Why can't you have it in the main room at a time when everyone's awake?
Because we're a family convention. I believe what you are looking for is a porn con. Anime and hentai ARE NOT INTERCHANGEABLE. You are lucky we have anything at all. Also, I hate you.
Q: I really want to go to your con. Can you fly me in from Ohio?
Ohio has more anime conventions than museums. In fact, our sister con is up there. So no. You have even less of a chance of us personally providing you with transport than everyone else. Everyone else's chances are about as good as Frosty's chance of surviving a vacation in hell.
Which makes your score -30958902480938%
Q: I can't afford to pay $15-45 for a three day convention with a completely full program. Are there any discounts?
No. Try selling your dollfie. Hell, that should be enough money to pay for ten years of college.
... Please don't ask me to explain what college is.
Q: It's awfully inconvenient to travel half an hour to your location. Can't you hold the con in my backyard?
Sure, I'll just do the whole magical-girl transformation thing again, and warp the convention to defy space, time, and finances. That way, everyone ever can go to it whenever they want, where-ever they want, FOR FREE.
(I never get these from people 3+ hours away or out of state. It's always people who have to drive further just to get to a mall.)
Q: When is the convention?
How in the hell did you manage to find the e-mail for the proper person to send this question, and yet entirely miss the whole first page of the website?
-------------
Creepy
-------------
Q: Can I have your IM?
Do you need additional information on what we were discussing?
Q: No, but I really like talking to you.
My IMs are connected to personal e-mail accounts. Please PM me on the forums or e-mail me at information @ con.dur. I check both at least 3-5 times a day.
And then I never hear from her again. It's always females, too.
Q: Marry me?
Buy me hand-made Jfashion clothes and pay my tuition?
Q: Hey baby-
No.
---------------------------------------------------------------
What part of "That's not my job" can you not understand?
---------------------------------------------------------------
Yesterday afternoon I get an e-mail from our Director of Dealers asking me for the list of dealers who have paid for tables, how many tables they paid for, and their contact info. I politely reply that she accidentally sent the e-mail to me, and "They don't really tell me that stuff." This was like 2pm. I hear nothing from DoD and assume the matter has been taken care of.
Now, it should be noted that all staff members are required to use a standard signature in all con-related e-mail and even on the forum. This means that she not only addressed a message to information @ con.dur and got a reply from information @ con.dur, but said reply had, two lines bellow my text,: "Napoleana Rabotte; Director of Visitor Information; information @ con.dur; Convention Name; http://con.dur"
So, seeing as how I'm the Director of Visitor Information, I really don't have to help directors, do I? But I will, because I am nice like that.
This morning (and this was the morning when I have to wake up super early, too), I get e-mail from DoD full of bitching that she "was told" it was my job to "keep track of the money." Riiight. The Director for Visitor Information keeps track of the money. Always a good idea to title me something entirely different than what my job is.
She then goes on to whine about how (Director of DoD) gave her a list that she is suspicious of, and she really wants to know what I have, and this is kind of important, wah wah wah... You get the idea.
I reply back with a FULL description of exactly what my job entails, then tell her that she is looking for the Senior Director of Revenue, Napoleona Smith, at revenue @ con.dur
You're a director now, sweetheart. Buy a clue.
---
Oy, that's all. No more. It's long enough as it is.
I'm slowly watching my way through it now. 
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