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She Called Me a "Helpful Smart-A**"

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  • She Called Me a "Helpful Smart-A**"

    I work in the computer department. I sell computers and related stuff. We have a tech department, but that's not me. (Trust me. You want a computer that does a certain thing? Come talk to me. If it's not doing what it's supposed to be doing, find somebody else.) Often, customers are simply not aware of the difference or are not patient enough with the phone menu to wait for the "tech support" option and ask me about their computer problems. If I can help I will, but I usually have to transfer the call. This also happens when customers want to check on the status of their computer when it is in for repair. This is the story of one such phone call.

    Phone rings. I answer. A female caller asked about her computer. I said I'd have to transfer her to the guys who'd know if it was fixed and ready for her. No problem. Transfer complete.

    About 20 minutes later, the phone rings again. I answer. It was the same female caller, but now she has mutated into the Grand High B**ch Goddess. Here are a few snippets of the conversation.

    Me: (Store) Computers, this is HawaiianShirts.
    GHBG: (already brusque, but not yet mean) Yes, how do I get in touch with your store's general manager?
    Me: Well, you'd have to call back when he's here.
    GHBG: (Explosively angry) You don't need to be a smart-a** with me! I was already frustrated, and now you've made me really mad!
    Me: I see that, but the general manager is not here right now.
    GHBG: See? That's all you'd have to say! I'm so sick of smart-a**es like you trying to be funny!

    Isn't that what I did say? That the GM wasn't there?

    So she goes on and on about how she needs to "file a formal complaint with the GM" because she's so "pissed off." She claimed that when I had transferred her to the techs, the phone rang 50 times without being answered. So she called back three more times, trying three other extensions, and letting it ring 50 times all without anybody answering (which I find hard to believe, but I wasn't going to argue). So she tried my extension again and got me.

    GHBG: I just need to know what's going on with my computer. Heaven knows you've had it for long enough!

    She went on about how long it was in for repairs (something big, I guess) and how she called earlier to check on its status.

    GHBG: Somebody said it was ready. I asked if they'd done the last diagnostic I'd asked for, and he was like, "Oh... Uh... No... I'll go do that..." He said he'd call me when it was done. It's been two hours, and nobody called me. But I'm not surprised because you don't answer your phones, so why should you ever use them to call anybody?

    And complain and complain and complain about how incompetent we must be. Meanwhile, I went to the tech bench to check on her computer. I got one of the techs to find it. He pulled up the diagnostic report, saw that everything was fine, and started shutting down and boxing up her computer.

    GHBG: I'm gonna complain about all of you to your manager. Your incompetence is appaling, and YOU are just plain rude! Now what about my computer?!
    Me: Actually, while you've been talking to me, I went up to the tech bench and checked on it. Diagnostic shows it's good. Mike is boxing it up now. It'll be ready when you get here.
    GHBG: Oh. It's ready?
    Me: Yeah.
    GHBG: And it's fixed?
    Me: Looks fine to me.
    GHBG: And the tests are all done?
    Me: I've got the report right in front of me.
    GHBG: Oh. Well I'm not coming up tonight. I live 20 miles away, and I don't want to drive all that way now. I'll get it in the morning.
    Me: Sounds good to me. We'll have it ready for you.
    GHBG: But you can be sure I'm going to be reporting you! You may have checked on my computer for me, but you were still rude! You may have been helpful, but you're still a... You're a helpful smart-a**.

    There is just no pleasing some people. And, of course, I'm not responsible for what happened, but I have to bear the brunt of Her Highness's fury.



    (Now I'm going to go off-topic in my own thread.) And I'm confused about something. At one point during the call, I apologized for offending her and for her inconvenience (partially sincere). She said, "You can apologize all you want, but it doesn't do any good! You still made that rude comment! You can't change it now!" I had a girlfriend once who said the same thing. While it's true I can't take back what I said, what else am I to do but apologize? Why is that not worth anything now?
    I suspect that... inside every adult (sometimes not very far inside) is a bratty kid who wants everything his own way.
    - Bill Watterson

    My co-workers: They're there when they need me.
    - IPF

  • #2
    You took all her Bitch Ammo away by actually solving the problem so she's left to sputter at your GM over how damned helpful you were, YOU BASTARD!
    "You know, there are times when it's a source of personal pride not to be human." - Hobbes

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    • #3
      Quoth HawaiianShirts View Post
      (Now I'm going to go off-topic in my own thread.) And I'm confused about something. At one point during the call, I apologized for offending her and for her inconvenience (partially sincere). She said, "You can apologize all you want, but it doesn't do any good! You still made that rude comment! You can't change it now!" I had a girlfriend once who said the same thing. While it's true I can't take back what I said, what else am I to do but apologize? Why is that not worth anything now?
      Some people tend to get offended to a point that no matter what you do they just can't get over it. Even over the most insignificant, smallest, irrelevant, and pointless things.
      The Grand Galactic Inquisitor hears all and sees all.

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      • #4
        I'm sure this is said on the forum all the time, but let me repeat it.

        Some people are at their happiest and most content when they are complaining. You probably made her day.

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        • #5
          Quoth HawaiianShirts View Post
          ......what else am I to do but apologize?
          Rip out your guts with a spork while rolling around on broken glass and razor blades, while at the same time singing Whitney Houston's I will always love you. That should please even the most tempermental GF.




          *ducks and hides*
          I know nothing and I can prove it!

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          • #6
            "Helpful smart-ass!" I think I'll steal that from you for a little while. Hope you don't mind.
            "Wouldn't that be unethical?"
            "That's only an issue for those who aren't already in Hell."
            --Dilbert

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            • #7
              Quoth HawaiianShirts View Post
              So she called back three more times, trying three other extensions, and letting it ring 50 times all without anybody answering (which I find hard to believe, but I wasn't going to argue).
              When I was a kid I once let the phone ring just to see how many times it would ring. I think it disconnected at around 30. So I, too, am skeptical of her claims...

              Frankly, I think the snarkiness of your answer is all in the tone of voice, not the words themselves.

              While it's true I can't take back what I said, what else am I to do but apologize? Why is that not worth anything now?
              Well, did she ASK for an apology? NO! You do what the customer asks and nothing more or less! Stop being so damn....damn....HELPFUL!!!!
              I don't go in for ancient wisdom
              I don't believe just 'cause ideas are tenacious
              It means that they're worthy - Tim Minchin, "White Wine in the Sun"

              Comment


              • #8
                Quoth freaktard View Post
                "Helpful smart-ass!" I think I'll steal that from you for a little while. Hope you don't mind.
                Have at it. I found it amusing in an annoying sort of way, but I have no desire to claim it.
                I suspect that... inside every adult (sometimes not very far inside) is a bratty kid who wants everything his own way.
                - Bill Watterson

                My co-workers: They're there when they need me.
                - IPF

                Comment


                • #9
                  Quoth freaktard View Post
                  "Helpful smart-ass!"
                  I tend to get that when I do something PAINFULLY easy that someone just doesn't get. It's funny.

                  Boyfriend: I can't get lined up to hit it on the game!
                  Me: Two arrow keys and a click later BOOM.

                  The looks are CLASSIC.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Quoth HawaiianShirts View Post

                    GHBG: But you can be sure I'm going to be reporting you! You may have checked on my computer for me, but you were still rude! You may have been helpful, but you're still a... You're a helpful smart-a**.
                    Yeah? and you are a raging ungrateful bitch. What is your point?
                    "It's times like these that make me wanna go straight."
                    James from Pokémon.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Quoth HawaiianShirts View Post
                      (Now I'm going to go off-topic in my own thread.) And I'm confused about something. At one point during the call, I apologized for offending her and for her inconvenience (partially sincere). She said, "You can apologize all you want, but it doesn't do any good! You still made that rude comment! You can't change it now!" I had a girlfriend once who said the same thing. While it's true I can't take back what I said, what else am I to do but apologize? Why is that not worth anything now?
                      I'd said that on a handful of occasions to my ex-long-term. In my case, I didn't want him to say anything, I just wanted him to shut up and leave me alone until I got over it myself. (He is an eternal sufferer of foot-in-mouth disease.)

                      Of course, in the case of the SC, I doubt that was the case. She just wanted to gripe, and admitting that apology was what she wanted would mean stepping off her high horse and shutting up, when clearly her real goal was to yell until she was mute.

                      In all honesty, the way you originally told her the manager was not there did sound snarky, but given my aforementioned experience with foot-in-mouth-disease, I don't find it hard to believe that that wasn't how you meant it. (And even if it was, who am I to assume you hadn't just had a REALLY bad day?)
                      The icon is a bunny with a spiked collar from some carpet ad.

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                      • #12
                        I had a couple of people complain about me for something similar. What did I do? I was (apparently) overly helpful. Not sarcastic, not rude, just overly helpful. The only reason the manager brought it to my attention was because he felt I needed the laugh.

                        It went on my record as a compliment.
                        I AM the evil bastard!
                        A+ Certified IT Technician

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                        • #13
                          Quoth napoleana View Post
                          In all honesty, the way you originally told her the manager was not there did sound snarky
                          Well, the way I took it was to mean that the manager cannot be reached unless he's at the store, as I know sometimes some places will contact a manager who is off-site to ask questions of policy and such, and sometimes, the best way of saying something is to just say it. The only other way of phrasing it at that point would be to say "The manager will next be in at X" but that only works if you actually know when, and I rarely knew my managers' schedules.
                          Ba'al: I'm a god. Gods are all-knowing.

                          http://unrelatedcaptions.com/45147

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