- You Are Different and That's Bad
- The Boy Who Died From Eating All His Vegetables
- Fun Four-Letter Words to Know and Share
- Hammers, Screwdrivers, Scissors and Saws: An I-Can-Do-It Book
- The Children's Guide to Hitchiking
- Curious George and the High-Voltage Fence
- The Little Sissy Who Snitched
- Some Puppies Can Fly!
- That's It, I'm Putting You Up For Adoption!
- The Pop-Up Kama Sutra
- The Magical World Inside the Abandoned Refrigerator
- Garfield Gets Feline Leukemia
- Strangers Have the Best Candy
- Whining, Kicking and Crying to Get Your Way
- Controlling the Playground: How to Gain Respect Through Fear
- Things Rich Kids Have But You Never Will
- Pop! Goes the Hamster, and Other Fun Microwave Games
- Eggs, Toilet Paper, Shaving Cream and Your School
- Places Where Mommy and Daddy Hide Neat Things
- Daddy Drinks Because You Cry (Somebody actually made this into a book! http://members.aol.com/petesmind/Kid...addydrinks.htm. There are also baby t-shirts available: http://www.tshirthell.com/babyhell.shtml)
- The Attention Deficit Disorder Association's Book of Wild Animals of North Amer-
Hey! Let's Go Ride Our Bikes! - The Hardy Boys, the Barbie Twins, and the Vice Squad
- Babar Meets the Taxidermist
- Oh, the Places You'll Scratch and Sniff!
- The Berenstain Bears Maul Some Campers and are Shot Dead
- What is That Dog Doing to That Other Dog?
- Dick, Jane and Spot Visit The 'Hood
- Daddy Loses His Job and Finds the Bottle
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Bad, bad, really bad childrens books!
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Bad, bad, really bad childrens books!
Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.
"I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost dailyTags: None
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Don't forget the following classics:
-Let's Draw Betty and Veronica With Their Clothes Off
-Drinking From Unmarked Bottles: A Taster's Guide
-Where to Kick Daddy
-So You Hate Your Baby-sitter: A Begginer's Guide to Knot-Tying
-Candy is Better for You Than VegetablesI pray for the strength to change what I can, the inability to change what I can't, and the incapacity to tell the difference -Calvin, Calvin & Hobbes
Being a pessimist and cynical wouldn't be so bad if I wasn't right so often!
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Okay, I'm busting a gut here. I cut and paste parts of my orginal post into Gizoogle, to have it translated into...um...Jive, and here's some of the better results:
- Hamma, Screwdriva, Scissors n Saws n' shit: An I-Can-Do-It Book
- Hustla Have tha Best Candy
- Pop! Goes tha Killa n Cracka Fun Microwave Games
- Places Where Mommy n D-A-Double-Dizzy Hizzy Nizzle Things
- D-A-Double-Dizzy Drinks Coz You Cry
- The Berenstain Bears Mizzy Some Campa n is S-H-to-tha-izzot Dead
- Perpetratin' Rizzle Kids Hizzle But You Bitch Will
Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.
"I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost daily
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