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We must be getting near a full moon because yesterday was a tsunami of stoopid!
First of all I got oodles of customer service calls coming in on the sales numbers and I know that at the end of every sales call the number for customer service is given out, its emailed to the customer and it's posted on our website in big bold print. Not supposed to ring on the sales lines.
On the sales floor the way it works is the higher your sales percentages the faster the sales calls are routed to you. Only the low sellers and the temps and part timers have to work both the CS line and the Sales line. I'm pretty high up in the sales rankings so if things work like they are supposed to I can go a few days with no customer service calls coming my way.
Since management decided a few months ago it was more cost effective to let everyone from the customer service go except for about five people. Those five people get email tickets from the people answering the customer service lines and they work on the problems. The official policy is that if you get a customer service call, no matter how highly ranked you are, then you are responsible for filing out a cs ticket and emailing it to a cs agent to handle.
I spent most of the day getting customer service calls. You cannot transfer them into the customer service queue because that is strictly for call backs, you have to take a ticket.
Sweetie/F*cker
First sc would start each and every whining demand sentence by calling me 'sweetie' and somehow manage to throw the f-bomb or some other obscenity in the end of the same sentence. I was amazed and astounded, eventually just hanging up on Sweet Potty Mouth SC.
Hooked On Fonicks!
Tons of people calling in that signed up for our discount program and neglected to read that it was a monthly charge even if it's in big bold print that blinks and they had to click the 'I accept the terms and conditions' button no less than three times. Several of them had the nerve to tell me 'Why should I be expected to read??'
Once, Twice, Three Times A Stoopid!
One man called ranting and screaming because he was being billed thrice a month for the discount program since February. Turns out he signed up for the program three times in February just for the discount and is now too stoopid to go back online and cancel his membership. To do that he would have had to use three totally different email addresses to override the coding that will not allow you to sign up more than once with the same customer by identifying them by the email addy.
Freaking Cheap Ass Human Myna Bird
What's the deal with asking the same question three different times three different ways back to back? I thought at first I was dealing with prankster or a bored teen trying to pull my leg but after a few minutes it was obvious this chicks elevator didn't go all the way to the top floors.
Me: Thank you for calling Flowers O Suck. This is Calulu. How may I help you?
SC: Uh yeah, it says in the phone book that your stuff starts at 30 bucks. What is that?
Me: The thirty dollar special is either a half dozen mylar balloons or a bud vase with three premium large flowers with greenery.
SC: How many balloons is that?
Me: A half dozen
Sc: Yeah, but I want to know how many there are.
Me: That would be a total of six of the large helium filled mylar balloons.
Sc: But how many is that again.
Me: Six, as in 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 and 6.
Sc: The bud vase, how many flowers did you say is in that?
Me: Three large flowers.
Sc: I meant I wanted to know the total number of flowers in that vase.
Me: Like I just said, there are three large premium flowers in the 30 dollar arrangement.
Sc: What does that cost again?
Me: Thirty dollars plus tax and delivery
Sc: And how many flowers do you get again?
Me: Three, as in 1, 2 and 3.
Sc: What's a bud vase?
Me: It's a small glass vase about eight inches tall only big enough to hold a few flowers.
Sc: Could you put more flowers in it if I asked?
Me: No, it only hold a few flowers.
Sc: Why is it called a bud vase?
Me: Because it's designed to only hold one or a few flowers.
Sc: Yeah, but what does that have to do with buds?
and so it goes... she did this for a good ten minutes before telling me she didn't have a credit or a debit card and didn't have a clue what she wanted to send. Another fine product of our American public school educational system obviously.
First of all I got oodles of customer service calls coming in on the sales numbers and I know that at the end of every sales call the number for customer service is given out, its emailed to the customer and it's posted on our website in big bold print. Not supposed to ring on the sales lines.
On the sales floor the way it works is the higher your sales percentages the faster the sales calls are routed to you. Only the low sellers and the temps and part timers have to work both the CS line and the Sales line. I'm pretty high up in the sales rankings so if things work like they are supposed to I can go a few days with no customer service calls coming my way.
Since management decided a few months ago it was more cost effective to let everyone from the customer service go except for about five people. Those five people get email tickets from the people answering the customer service lines and they work on the problems. The official policy is that if you get a customer service call, no matter how highly ranked you are, then you are responsible for filing out a cs ticket and emailing it to a cs agent to handle.
I spent most of the day getting customer service calls. You cannot transfer them into the customer service queue because that is strictly for call backs, you have to take a ticket.
Sweetie/F*cker
First sc would start each and every whining demand sentence by calling me 'sweetie' and somehow manage to throw the f-bomb or some other obscenity in the end of the same sentence. I was amazed and astounded, eventually just hanging up on Sweet Potty Mouth SC.
Hooked On Fonicks!
Tons of people calling in that signed up for our discount program and neglected to read that it was a monthly charge even if it's in big bold print that blinks and they had to click the 'I accept the terms and conditions' button no less than three times. Several of them had the nerve to tell me 'Why should I be expected to read??'
Once, Twice, Three Times A Stoopid!
One man called ranting and screaming because he was being billed thrice a month for the discount program since February. Turns out he signed up for the program three times in February just for the discount and is now too stoopid to go back online and cancel his membership. To do that he would have had to use three totally different email addresses to override the coding that will not allow you to sign up more than once with the same customer by identifying them by the email addy.
Freaking Cheap Ass Human Myna Bird
What's the deal with asking the same question three different times three different ways back to back? I thought at first I was dealing with prankster or a bored teen trying to pull my leg but after a few minutes it was obvious this chicks elevator didn't go all the way to the top floors.
Me: Thank you for calling Flowers O Suck. This is Calulu. How may I help you?
SC: Uh yeah, it says in the phone book that your stuff starts at 30 bucks. What is that?
Me: The thirty dollar special is either a half dozen mylar balloons or a bud vase with three premium large flowers with greenery.
SC: How many balloons is that?
Me: A half dozen
Sc: Yeah, but I want to know how many there are.
Me: That would be a total of six of the large helium filled mylar balloons.
Sc: But how many is that again.
Me: Six, as in 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 and 6.
Sc: The bud vase, how many flowers did you say is in that?
Me: Three large flowers.
Sc: I meant I wanted to know the total number of flowers in that vase.
Me: Like I just said, there are three large premium flowers in the 30 dollar arrangement.
Sc: What does that cost again?
Me: Thirty dollars plus tax and delivery
Sc: And how many flowers do you get again?
Me: Three, as in 1, 2 and 3.
Sc: What's a bud vase?
Me: It's a small glass vase about eight inches tall only big enough to hold a few flowers.
Sc: Could you put more flowers in it if I asked?
Me: No, it only hold a few flowers.
Sc: Why is it called a bud vase?
Me: Because it's designed to only hold one or a few flowers.
Sc: Yeah, but what does that have to do with buds?
and so it goes... she did this for a good ten minutes before telling me she didn't have a credit or a debit card and didn't have a clue what she wanted to send. Another fine product of our American public school educational system obviously.
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