"Are you married" crazy on the bus

[Cookie]

My husband won't post his sightings, but I'm taking this on myself because it's just too insane.

My husband (known as evilprogrammer on this site, I'll call him EP) was riding the bus today when a crazy lady gets on and proceeds to scream at the bus driver unintelligibly for the next several stops. Then, she parks herself behind EP and starts singing. Sorta. The "song" ended with her saying something to the effect of "I want to sing, but I don't know how". Then, she proceeded to bellow "HAPPY NEW YEAR" to everyone who boarded the bus, hurting poor EP's ears every time in the process since she was right behind. She also tried to offer her used gum to everyone. Then this happened:

CL (crazy lady): *tug tug tug on EP's collar*
EP: *in shock* *glare*
CL: ARE YOU MARRIED???
EP: Yes. *turns back around*
CL: TELL YOUR WIFE I SAID I'M SORRY!

He was attempting to give off enough of a "don't touch me" vibe, to prevent this again. It was not to be.

CL: *tug tug tug*
EP: *glare*
CL: DO YOU HAVE CHILDREN???
EP: No. Don't touch me again.

EP has a big, deep, boomy, sometimes scary, radio voice. CL shrank back in her seat. But she did announce to the bus: HE DOESN'T HAVE CHILDREN!!!

He got off the bus shortly thereafter. She seemed to contemplate following him, but decided against it.

He is a total sightings magnet. I keep telling him he needs to post them here.

[lupo pazzesco]

Heh, I've had the "are you married?" crazies while on the bus WAAAAY more times than I can count.

Of course, when I say no, I then get propositioned, and - on a couple occasions - proposed to on the spot.

EP is a sightings magnet, too? Geez, imagine if the two of us ever teamed up. We'd bring about a sightings apocalypse of some kind, I'm sure. That'd be both awesome and fucking SCARY.

[wagegoth]

Heh, I've had the "are you married?" crazies while on the bus WAAAAY more times than I can count.

Of course, when I say no, I then get propositioned, and - on a couple occasions - proposed to on the spot.

EP is a sightings magnet, too? Geez, imagine if the two of us ever teamed up. We'd bring about a sightings apocalypse of some kind, I'm sure. That'd be both awesome and fucking SCARY.

No, no, don't dooooooooooooo iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit!


But, if you do, please film it for us.

[slipknotpsycho]

does anyone else picture the crazy lady from the OP as the cat lady from the simpsons?

[XCashier]

does anyone else picture the crazy lady from the OP as the cat lady from the simpsons?

I was picturing Crazy Hat Lady from Retail!

[mharbourgirl]

EP is a sightings magnet, too? Geez, imagine if the two of us ever teamed up. We'd bring about a sightings apocalypse of some kind, I'm sure. That'd be both awesome and fucking SCARY.

Why is it that the first thing that popped into my head is 'Don't cross the streams!!!'.

I agree, this would be an XK-Level event that really should not happen. Lemme step into the next universe and grab some popcorn, though, if you do decide to do it. That'd make a hell of a movie!

[Cookie]

I have often thought how EP and Lupo should not meet up in any way that could result in sightings.

He recently had a random stranger insist that he sounded Romanian. EP is from Alabama, but the southern accent has been mostly neutralized. Nowhere near Romania. The guy was so sure that's what he sounded like, though.

[MoonCat]

See, this is why I say yes when some nutbag asks if I'm married. Usually shuts them down, more or less.

Sadly, it's never the nice normal ones who ask....just the jerks.

[Spork4pedro]

Haha XCashier! I was picturing the same thing!

[Engmfj]

Oh dear, if I posted all the weird, annoying and psycho sightings on the busses around here, I'd need a whole forum for that thread alone ..

One of my friends, who is a bus driver, once told me that she'd been proposed to by a regular passenger. And he didn't just sort of blurt it out in the spur of the moment or anything (and she already told him she wasn't interested) - the guy went on his knees with flowers in front of her bus!

[wagegoth]

Oh dear, if I posted all the weird, annoying and psycho sightings on the busses around here, I'd need a whole forum for that thread alone ..

One of my friends, who is a bus driver, once told me that she'd been proposed to by a regular passenger. And he didn't just sort of blurt it out in the spur of the moment or anything (and she already told him she wasn't interested) - the guy went on his knees with flowers in front of her bus!

While I was riding public transit, I started a blog, just to recount the insanity I saw multiple times a week. It was pretty cathartic.

[Kitten in the box]

roflfmao! for some reason i envisioned a snaggly toothed crackhead lady this little show for everyone.

[RecoveringKinkoid]

See, this is why I say yes when some nutbag asks if I'm married. Usually shuts them down, more or less.

Sadly, it's never the nice normal ones who ask....just the jerks.

I'm surprised you don't get a follow up of "so, do you fool around?", which straight up offends me and is an excellent way to get a ranting bitch in the face.

I don't care if someone flirts as long as they are respectful about it. Trivializing my family, my husband, my morals, and my marriage while calling me unfaithful in a public place will provoke a very awkward social situation that matches the insult.