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Irv's gettin' nuttin' for Christmas....

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  • Irv's gettin' nuttin' for Christmas....

    ♪ 'cuz he ain't been nothing but baaaaaaaad.... ♫

    Went out this afternoon to finish off my Christmas shopping. Among my stops was World Market, where I bought some items to assemble a gift basket for my sister and her fiance.

    Another one of my stops was Old Navy. As I was perusing their dog toys near the checkout, I noticed Santa Claus making an entrance. Actually, it was a female Old Navy employee in a Santa suit, complete with beard and black boot tops.

    I turned back to the dog toys when Santa approached me and asked "Have you been good this year, young man?"

    A number of good responses filled my mind, but I ultimately went with "I'm going to have to plead the fifth on that one."

    I got a York Peppermint Pattie from Santa anyway.
    Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.

    "I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost daily

  • #2
    Hey, those mint patties are delicious!
    "Employees can make or break any business, so treat them with respect. Job satisfaction has little to do with money. Discover what it has to do with and make sure they get it."

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    • #3
      I really wanted to sit on Santa's lap at the mall today, but damn if that line wasn't all the way out to the other wings of the mall.
      You really need to see a neurologist. - Wagegoth

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      • #4
        I have a ready made Santa. This is my Dad.



        (And me, when I was 60 pounds heavier)

        He was playing Santa last Christmas for a tiny little church doing a Santa thing for foster kids and I couldn't resist sitting on Santa's lap.
        At the conclusion of an Irish wedding, the priest said "Everybody please hug the person who has made your life worth living. The bartender was nearly crushed to death.

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        • #5
          Wicked, bad, naughty Irv! He's been a bad person and he must pay the penalty!
          To right the countless wrongs of our days... We shine this light of true redemption, that this place may become as paradise...Oh, what a wonderful world such would be...

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          • #6
            Irv...you be careful with those peppermint patties. I heard that every bite puts you back on top of that mountain.

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            • #7
              Get the sensation
              I'm trying to see things from your point of view, but I can't get my head that far up my keister!

              Who is John Galt?
              -Ayn Rand, Atlas Shrugged

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              • #8
                mathnerd, I'm going to petition the other mods for a LIKE button.

                Irv, I can actually see you being that bad as a kid.

                Hell, I can see you being that bad now.
                Human Resources - the adult version of "I'm telling Mom." - Agent Anthony "Tony" DiNozzo (NCIS)

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                • #9
                  Peppermint Pattie? As in Charlie Brown?
                  The Copyright Monster has made me tell you that my avatar is courtesy of the wonderful Alice XZ.And you don't want to annoy the Copyright Monster.

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                  • #10
                    More like these, Kit ^_^
                    "For a musician, the SNES sound engine is like using Crayola Crayons. Nobuo Uematsu used Crayola Crayons to paint the Sistine Chapel." - Jeremy Jahns (re: "Dancing Mad")
                    "The difference between an amateur and a master is that the master has failed way more times." - JoCat
                    "Thinking is difficult, therefore let the herd pronounce judgment!" ~ Carl Jung
                    "There's burning bridges, and then there's the lake just to fill it with gasoline." - Wiccy, reddit
                    "Retail is a cruel master, and could very well be the most educational time of many people's lives, in its own twisted way." - me
                    "Love keeps her in the air when she oughta fall down...tell you she's hurtin' 'fore she keens...makes her a home." - Capt. Malcolm Reynolds, "Serenity" (2005)
                    Acts of Gord – Read it, Learn it, Love it!
                    "Our psychic powers only work if the customer has a mind to read." - me

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                    • #11
                      Mathnerd my daddy looks like santa too!!

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                      • #12
                        Quoth Sunshine View Post
                        Mathnerd my daddy looks like santa too!!
                        Did you have as much fun as I did with younger siblings and the Daddy-looks-like-Santa thing? I have a sister that's 13 years younger than I am and when she was little my other sisters and I had her convinced one year that the reason why daddy was out of town so close to Christmas was because Daddy was really Santa and was at the North Pole working on getting everything done. She was 3 at the time, and we had her convinced for at least a couple years.
                        At the conclusion of an Irish wedding, the priest said "Everybody please hug the person who has made your life worth living. The bartender was nearly crushed to death.

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                        • #13
                          Lol no...but he had a beard when my sister was small and had to shave it off. She saw him cleanshaven, slammed the door and locked it. "He's driving daddy's truck but thats not him!!!" He went gray and the santa stories started then. He loves it.

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                          • #14
                            My dad has a skin condition that turns it and all his hair white. He also has no natural protection against sun, so he keeps the full facial hair. He has a little fun with the look. This year he programmed an app where he can type it a kid's name, and it makes some noise and then says if the kid is on the naughty or nice list. If course all the kids are on the nice list. He pulls his phone out to use the app every time a kid approaches him in public.
                            At the conclusion of an Irish wedding, the priest said "Everybody please hug the person who has made your life worth living. The bartender was nearly crushed to death.

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                            • #15
                              This reminds me of this sweet story from "Not always related!"
                              http://notalwaysrelated.com/santa-ha...his-year/28729
                              No trees were killed in the posting of this message.

                              However, a large number of electrons were terribly inconvenienced.

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