Stuffing things into other things

[bhskittykatt]

In nine years of delivering papers, I've seen a lot of trash stuffed into newspaper boxes. Mostly it's beer cans and food wrappers; some drunk student was wandering home and decided to stash their empties in the box (after all, putting it on the ground would be littering). I've seen a few sets of broken headphones; okay I can see a jogger with headphones that finally just die, and so they rip them off in frustration and chuck them as they pass a box. And once there was a used diaper; okay so maybe there was some emergency roadside diaper change.

Point is, all of these items, I can imagine the scenario where the trash ended up in the newspaper box.

Today I discovered something new: I found dildo packaging.

I'm trying to imagine the scenario where someone is walking down the street with a shiny new dildo, and they decide they can't wait until they get home, they have to open it right then and there and chuck the packaging in the box. I feel there's some sort of story here that I'm missing. I am curious, but at the same time frightened, of what that story details.

Dildo packaging. In a newspaper box.

What will they think of next?

[dalesys]

...What will they think of next?

Don't ask!

(Mrs. Cake!)

[KuariKaydrith]

Be happy that it was just the packaging and not a dildo without the packaging. You never know if that thing was used or not....

[wolfie]

Today I discovered something new: I found dildo packaging.

they have to open it right then and there and chuck the packaging in the box.

Of course, those of us with our minds in the gutter know that it's the dildo, not the packaging, that's supposed to go into the "box".

[Jay 2K Winger]

On a similar note to this thread topic--

Our mailbox has a little slot underneath it, part of the wooden post, presumably for smaller newspapers (most of the periodicals we get wouldn't fit there), but never gets used.

Last summer, I spotted a hornet buzzing around the mailbox and glanced inside that slot-- and lo and behold, there was a nest in there.

I quickly posted up a message on the mailbox (stuck inside a sealed sandwich bag to keep out the rain), warning the mailman about it, with a note that we'd take care of the nest that weekend.

Which we did. Sprayed it down with Raid, waited an hour or so, then I went out with a trowel and a garbage bag to scrape the nest and the other assorted crap that had accumulated in there (including an old abandoned bird's nest) into the garbage bag.

[notalwaysright]

Dildo packaging. In a newspaper box.

What will they think of next?

This town, I do wonder about it. One year around Halloween I asked what this guy was making and he said he was making a penis costume, and he described it. Part was him drawing on his shaved head. He was buying black fur, you know what that was for. My expression was basically:

[CorneliaMarieRocks]

skin flute

[Racket_Man]

Be happy that it was just the packaging and not a dildo without the packaging. You never know if that thing was used or not....

had that happen at the gas station years ago BUT both the packaging and said dildo were just laying out on top of the trash receptical.

[KuariKaydrith]

had that happen at the gas station years ago BUT both the packaging and said dildo were just laying out on top of the trash receptical.

Maybe they tried it on (in?) for size and it wasn't a good fit?

[LesserSouthernFroglet]

A couple of months ago a friend found one - on the side of a country road. Mind you, this thing was massive - black, nearly 2 feet long and about as thick as an adult wrist, with a big bulge at the business end. It also had a suction cap on the not-so-business end.

So what did he do? Attach it to the front of his car and drive around town with it...

[Racket_Man]

So what did he do? Attach it to the front of his car and drive around town with it...

Inspired by the movie Idiocracy?????

[bhskittykatt]

Be happy that it was just the packaging and not a dildo without the packaging. You never know if that thing was used or not....

At the motel job, I found a lot of dildos. We had a special box in Lost & Found for them. It was a large rubbermaid bin, and it was full when I left. One of the best days was when one of the housekeepers found what I ended up dubbing "a nest of dildos" in a room; it was a purse full of them and when she went to pick up the whole lot one of them started vibrating and she freaked out, so she called me in and I had to glove up and fish through them to find the culprit and deactivate it. We were dying of laughter the whole time.

[taxguykarl]

Inspired by the movie Idiocracy?????

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