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Just for the hell of it, I will consider this a little bit from Jem's side. See, I am not into babies and stuff, and I've been to baby showers where I felt hideously uncomfortable. The first couple of times I had to go buy a baby gift I felt like I had entered a foreign country without a guidebook.
But I went to the shower. I did not piss and moan, I took part in the silly games, gave the mother-to-be a nice gift and tried to be gracious, because if someone invites me to a party, it means they want me there, so I tried to enjoy it. But I felt out of place. So I'm guessing Jem feels this way at "traditional" female events. BTW, at work we once had a baby shower for a guy (his wife was invited of course) and it was HILARIOUS. He'd open gifts and go, "Hey, that's great! What is it?" It was loads of fun.
What I had to figure out was that these events were not about me....They were about the mother-to-be, or the bride, or whoever. Once I stopped thinking about myself I learned to relax. I'm still rather shy among strangers, but not as much as I used to be.
If Jem would stop focusing on herself and open up a bit...which might be what she does around Bride....she might discover that it's fun to be around other people who are celebrating something. She sounds like she's using offense as a defensive move, expecting other people not to like her, which ironically makes her unlikeable.
But I went to the shower. I did not piss and moan, I took part in the silly games, gave the mother-to-be a nice gift and tried to be gracious, because if someone invites me to a party, it means they want me there, so I tried to enjoy it. But I felt out of place. So I'm guessing Jem feels this way at "traditional" female events. BTW, at work we once had a baby shower for a guy (his wife was invited of course) and it was HILARIOUS. He'd open gifts and go, "Hey, that's great! What is it?" It was loads of fun.
What I had to figure out was that these events were not about me....They were about the mother-to-be, or the bride, or whoever. Once I stopped thinking about myself I learned to relax. I'm still rather shy among strangers, but not as much as I used to be.
If Jem would stop focusing on herself and open up a bit...which might be what she does around Bride....she might discover that it's fun to be around other people who are celebrating something. She sounds like she's using offense as a defensive move, expecting other people not to like her, which ironically makes her unlikeable.
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