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Now, Im a fk'in professional, right? It takes a lot me to lose my shit when Im at work, but I nearly just did that to a patient this morning and I literally had to walk out of the room before I ended up jobless.
Had a 40ish female come in to the ER after passing out at home. EMS didn't have the full story since the patient didnt speak english too well and the family didn't either. Thankfully, I speak spanish. So I got the story. She had drank "7, 8 or 9 Coronas", stood up got dizzy, hit the floor and went unconscious. Family called 911, and when EMS got there they sternal rubbed the heck out of her til she became conscious (she was breathing on her own, CPR wasnt necessary) and brought her in. All in all, standard night shift fare
About 10 minutes after she gets in, she wants to go home. I explain she cant sign herself out since shes been drinking. I tell her she can call a family member and sign out against medical advice, in the meantime the doctor comes in. She agrees to a blood draw and basic vital signs. 20 mins later, I walk her to the bathroom. She tells me she needs to go home, as she has young children at home. I help her dial her number, she talks to her husband and then hands me the phone. I tell the husband she needs an escort from the ER since shes been drinking. He says "Ok, Ill be there in 20 minutes".
Meanwhile, patient is in the room...pacing back and forth, back and forth. Shes steady on her feet, so I dont have a problem with this, she can go where she wants to in the room. About 30 minutes later, she starts screaming out of the door. I go in to see whats going on and she is just losing it. Shes screaming, crying, asking for a taxi home, rolling on the floor, rubbing her face on the wall. Shes screaming over me when Im trying to speak, so I just stare at her until she stops. When she calms down, I hand her the phone and she dials her husband..only this time the call goes straight to voicemail. She loses it again. It really looked something like this.
She tries to redial...and tries and tries and tries. Each time getting more frustrated and loud and screechy.
Meanwhile, Im the only one that can "help" her b/c no one else speaks spanish outside of the usual questions (pain, bathroom etc...at least my coworkers try. 
). I tell her to try and rest, well call them again in 10 minutes and see what happens.
So, about 7 mins later she stands at the door and SCREAMS. I mean screams. And theres no reasoning with her. "TAKE ME TO PRISON! I DONT WANT TO BE HERE ANYMORE! I WANT TO GO! WHY CANT I GO? AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" I really felt like this:
I try to calm her down, she starts trying to go chest to chest with me. I dont fudge around with that, so I call security, they show up and she calms down like 2 percent. I try to help her call her husband again. He picks up this time, she starts yelling at him and practically throws the phone at me. I talk to him and tell him, shes waiting for him and he says "Oh, yeah, what hospital is she at?"
Really?? I talked to you about 40 minutes ago, you said youd be here in 20 and now you're telling me you're still in bed AND you have no idea which hospital shes at?! He tells me he'll be here in 5 minutes and hangs up. She loses it on me and yells at me saying "He said that before. Why the fuck are you telling me 5 minutes now? Hes going back to sleep and ill be stuck here blahhhhhhhhhh" So, I very bluntly ask her what she expects me to do about her husband? If she has a problem with him she needs to speak to him, not me.
She continues to get more irate, not coming near me though as security is still there. Shes screaming at them, shes screaming at me and really Im just standing there watching it like a bad movie. Shes begging security to drive her home, begging me to let her walk, asking if someone can call the cops so she can just go to prison (yeah, b/c that will let you get home to your kids quicker...?)
And really it just goes on and on. Husband does not show up. As i am once again, trying to calm her down. Shes frantically dialing again. Im trying to suggest she call anyone else, family, friends, just some SOBER she can leave with. Her husband gets back on the phone after the 10th time shes dialed and tells me hes going to find someone with a car to come get her (yes, he was still in bed at this point. When she hears it, she goes even more insane, starts yelling at me again. I am fed up and actually yell at her for her to not yell at me. She calms down for maybe a minute and then goes crazy again. Running in a circle, rolling on the floor, blowing her nose in her hand and flinging the snot on the floor (
)all the while yelling for Jesus and how no one loves her. She starts using the phone again, and trying to hand it to me. I tell her I'm not talking to her family anymore, and she needs to calm down.
She yells at me "Youre full of shit. You didnt help me. You never even let me use the phone!!" At that point, I was done. Drunk or not, I dont want to deal with her anymore. I raise my voice and tell her shes the one who is full of shit. All I have done is help her and shes used my phone at least 25+ times (really, im not exaggerating). The funny thing was the louder I got, the calmer she became. By the time I was done with her she was sitting on the bed, as calm as can be. I tell her i will no longer be in to see her unless she needs medical attention,I direct her to the phone on the wall and leave when what i really wanted to do was beat her senseless (though she was senseless enough already). I sit to chart and blessedly get about 5 minutes to myself before she acts up again.
She then literally tries to push one of the security guards. I happen to see this and I grab the leather restraints..shake them in the doctors direction, he nods and she ends up tied to the bed
. When I walked in the restraints, she calmly laid on the bed and gave her arms to security to secure. Really? It almost seemed like she just wanted the attention and when she had it, even negatively, she was better. 
Her husband shows up a full hour later. Hes still clueless. He didnt understand why she couldnt just go home alone (she was drunk, you douche and its a liability).
I walk in, unlock her, have him sign her out, she says thank you and they walk out together.
This is a wonderful waste of resources btw. Next time you have a 4 hr wait in your ER waiting room, be sure to thank assholes like this.
I needed majorly medicated by the time I got home this AM.
Had a 40ish female come in to the ER after passing out at home. EMS didn't have the full story since the patient didnt speak english too well and the family didn't either. Thankfully, I speak spanish. So I got the story. She had drank "7, 8 or 9 Coronas", stood up got dizzy, hit the floor and went unconscious. Family called 911, and when EMS got there they sternal rubbed the heck out of her til she became conscious (she was breathing on her own, CPR wasnt necessary) and brought her in. All in all, standard night shift fare
About 10 minutes after she gets in, she wants to go home. I explain she cant sign herself out since shes been drinking. I tell her she can call a family member and sign out against medical advice, in the meantime the doctor comes in. She agrees to a blood draw and basic vital signs. 20 mins later, I walk her to the bathroom. She tells me she needs to go home, as she has young children at home. I help her dial her number, she talks to her husband and then hands me the phone. I tell the husband she needs an escort from the ER since shes been drinking. He says "Ok, Ill be there in 20 minutes".
Meanwhile, patient is in the room...pacing back and forth, back and forth. Shes steady on her feet, so I dont have a problem with this, she can go where she wants to in the room. About 30 minutes later, she starts screaming out of the door. I go in to see whats going on and she is just losing it. Shes screaming, crying, asking for a taxi home, rolling on the floor, rubbing her face on the wall. Shes screaming over me when Im trying to speak, so I just stare at her until she stops. When she calms down, I hand her the phone and she dials her husband..only this time the call goes straight to voicemail. She loses it again. It really looked something like this.
She tries to redial...and tries and tries and tries. Each time getting more frustrated and loud and screechy.
Meanwhile, Im the only one that can "help" her b/c no one else speaks spanish outside of the usual questions (pain, bathroom etc...at least my coworkers try. ). I tell her to try and rest, well call them again in 10 minutes and see what happens. So, about 7 mins later she stands at the door and SCREAMS. I mean screams. And theres no reasoning with her. "TAKE ME TO PRISON! I DONT WANT TO BE HERE ANYMORE! I WANT TO GO! WHY CANT I GO? AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" I really felt like this:
I try to calm her down, she starts trying to go chest to chest with me. I dont fudge around with that, so I call security, they show up and she calms down like 2 percent. I try to help her call her husband again. He picks up this time, she starts yelling at him and practically throws the phone at me. I talk to him and tell him, shes waiting for him and he says "Oh, yeah, what hospital is she at?"
Really?? I talked to you about 40 minutes ago, you said youd be here in 20 and now you're telling me you're still in bed AND you have no idea which hospital shes at?! He tells me he'll be here in 5 minutes and hangs up. She loses it on me and yells at me saying "He said that before. Why the fuck are you telling me 5 minutes now? Hes going back to sleep and ill be stuck here blahhhhhhhhhh" So, I very bluntly ask her what she expects me to do about her husband? If she has a problem with him she needs to speak to him, not me.
She continues to get more irate, not coming near me though as security is still there. Shes screaming at them, shes screaming at me and really Im just standing there watching it like a bad movie. Shes begging security to drive her home, begging me to let her walk, asking if someone can call the cops so she can just go to prison (yeah, b/c that will let you get home to your kids quicker...?)
And really it just goes on and on. Husband does not show up. As i am once again, trying to calm her down. Shes frantically dialing again. Im trying to suggest she call anyone else, family, friends, just some SOBER she can leave with. Her husband gets back on the phone after the 10th time shes dialed and tells me hes going to find someone with a car to come get her (yes, he was still in bed at this point. When she hears it, she goes even more insane, starts yelling at me again. I am fed up and actually yell at her for her to not yell at me. She calms down for maybe a minute and then goes crazy again. Running in a circle, rolling on the floor, blowing her nose in her hand and flinging the snot on the floor (
)all the while yelling for Jesus and how no one loves her. She starts using the phone again, and trying to hand it to me. I tell her I'm not talking to her family anymore, and she needs to calm down. She yells at me "Youre full of shit. You didnt help me. You never even let me use the phone!!" At that point, I was done. Drunk or not, I dont want to deal with her anymore. I raise my voice and tell her shes the one who is full of shit. All I have done is help her and shes used my phone at least 25+ times (really, im not exaggerating). The funny thing was the louder I got, the calmer she became. By the time I was done with her she was sitting on the bed, as calm as can be. I tell her i will no longer be in to see her unless she needs medical attention,I direct her to the phone on the wall and leave when what i really wanted to do was beat her senseless (though she was senseless enough already). I sit to chart and blessedly get about 5 minutes to myself before she acts up again.
She then literally tries to push one of the security guards. I happen to see this and I grab the leather restraints..shake them in the doctors direction, he nods and she ends up tied to the bed
. When I walked in the restraints, she calmly laid on the bed and gave her arms to security to secure. Really? It almost seemed like she just wanted the attention and when she had it, even negatively, she was better. Her husband shows up a full hour later. Hes still clueless. He didnt understand why she couldnt just go home alone (she was drunk, you douche and its a liability).
I walk in, unlock her, have him sign her out, she says thank you and they walk out together.
This is a wonderful waste of resources btw. Next time you have a 4 hr wait in your ER waiting room, be sure to thank assholes like this. I needed majorly medicated by the time I got home this AM.
you.
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