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Crime wave in the bakery aisle

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  • Crime wave in the bakery aisle

    Reports from Germany show that large quantities of fruitcake were stollen.

    In Britain, the public was outraged when charges were dropped against a gang which had stolen truckloads of desserts made from custard and sponge cake. The judge's explanation for his action was that "The law is not concerned with trifles".

    A recent survey shows that in reaction to these and similar incidents, over half the people polled are putting lox on their bagels.
    Any fool can piss on the floor. It takes a talented SC to shit on the ceiling.

  • #2
    These jokes feel half-baked to me.
    "For a musician, the SNES sound engine is like using Crayola Crayons. Nobuo Uematsu used Crayola Crayons to paint the Sistine Chapel." - Jeremy Jahns (re: "Dancing Mad")
    "The difference between an amateur and a master is that the master has failed way more times." - JoCat
    "Thinking is difficult, therefore let the herd pronounce judgment!" ~ Carl Jung
    "There's burning bridges, and then there's the lake just to fill it with gasoline." - Wiccy, reddit
    "Retail is a cruel master, and could very well be the most educational time of many people's lives, in its own twisted way." - me
    "Love keeps her in the air when she oughta fall down...tell you she's hurtin' 'fore she keens...makes her a home." - Capt. Malcolm Reynolds, "Serenity" (2005)
    Acts of Gord – Read it, Learn it, Love it!
    "Our psychic powers only work if the customer has a mind to read." - me

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    • #3
      If you were trying to get a rise out of us, you would be on a roll. Just don't try to butter us up.
      This site proves Corey Taylor right. Man really is a "four letter word."

      I'm now using my Deviant Art page to post my humor.

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      • #4
        These puns sound like the sort a Berliner would write.
        "For a musician, the SNES sound engine is like using Crayola Crayons. Nobuo Uematsu used Crayola Crayons to paint the Sistine Chapel." - Jeremy Jahns (re: "Dancing Mad")
        "The difference between an amateur and a master is that the master has failed way more times." - JoCat
        "Thinking is difficult, therefore let the herd pronounce judgment!" ~ Carl Jung
        "There's burning bridges, and then there's the lake just to fill it with gasoline." - Wiccy, reddit
        "Retail is a cruel master, and could very well be the most educational time of many people's lives, in its own twisted way." - me
        "Love keeps her in the air when she oughta fall down...tell you she's hurtin' 'fore she keens...makes her a home." - Capt. Malcolm Reynolds, "Serenity" (2005)
        Acts of Gord – Read it, Learn it, Love it!
        "Our psychic powers only work if the customer has a mind to read." - me

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        • #5
          Only a Danish would say that. Just don't do donuts in the parking lot.
          This site proves Corey Taylor right. Man really is a "four letter word."

          I'm now using my Deviant Art page to post my humor.

          Comment


          • #6
            At least he's cooking up some puns, instead of just loafing around.
            PWNADE(TM) - Serve up a glass today! | PWNZER - An act of pwnage so awesome, it's like the victim got hit by a tank.

            There are only Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse because I choose to walk!

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            • #7
              Are you saying my puns are cruller than his?

              Did you hear the doughnut shop was visited by wildlife? The bear claws came to a grizzly end.
              Last edited by catcul; 08-18-2015, 01:16 PM.
              This site proves Corey Taylor right. Man really is a "four letter word."

              I'm now using my Deviant Art page to post my humor.

              Comment


              • #8
                Do nut continue in this pointless thread! Or I shall have to beat you with a loaf of day-old bread.
                Customers should always be served . . . to the nearest great white.

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