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  • #16
    Wow. Really? He left comments badmouthing you in the files he produced for you and seriously thinks that you'd be willing to go anywhere near him ever again as a contractor?

    I still maintain that he's got some addiction problem that's getting worse and it's only a matter of time before he completely self-destructs.

    ^-.-^
    Faith is about what you do. It's about aspiring to be better and nobler and kinder than you are. It's about making sacrifices for the good of others. - Dresden

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    • #17
      I'd want to sue his ass for...something. Arrest him for blackmail, I dunno. I'm not a lawyer and not into computers, so I can't even imagine the backlash he could cause as a result. It's just I'm angry from reading this and can't imagine the pain you're being put through. What a sucky thing to happen and I'm glad the community is helping you.
      A lion however, will only devour your corpse, whereas an SC is not sated until they have destroyed your soul. (Quote per infinitemonkies)

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      • #18
        Wait ... he's trying to talk you into ... doing MORE business with him?? On the heels of this?!?
        I could see him, in maybe six to eight months, thinking, "Oh well, she's probably forgotten about all that ..." but this is what, 24 hours after all this cr*p went down!

        I think Andara's right; he's probably got some kind of addiction and that's causing all this bizarre behaviour, and now that he's flip-flopped again, he's hoping to get you back to do all kindsa nice stuff for him again (which will now include not expecting him to do his work ...)

        I'm glad to hear you got your codes changed, got your files back, are on the lookout for malicious content and have a potential replacement signed up.

        Also glad to see your moderately eeeeebil laugh at the idea you would work with him again. Here's to better things in the future!

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        • #19
          I've been debating how to reply. I've helped Seraph out in dealing with the asshat, and am helping her figure out to how do things with other coders so that she won't ever have a situation reach this point again, no matter who she deals with.

          For everybody else, please, take some advice from this story. Seraph got taken in by a coder that... Sadly, his personality type is overly common in my industry. I see them frequently, and dealing with them is incredibly difficult.

          Too many IT types (developers, system administrators, help desk, network engineers, take your pick, any of the technology professionals) have an over inflated sense of self-worth. The individuals I'm speaking of believe that they are the most important cog in the machine, that without them, everything will crumble. They forget (or have yet to figure out) that they are just a cog. Systems will function, the company will run, regardless of their presence.

          A group that overlaps with that is the type that feels the person or company that hired them owes them money above and beyond what they're getting paid. They feel they're owed a living forever until they decide to move on to a new job. They will even leave behind surprises to punish companies that let them go without their permission.

          I'm ashamed of people like this, and what they do to the image of my profession. I'm far from perfect (as I'm sure has been noted, I do have an ego, and I'm sure that more than a few people would be happy were I to just vanish permanently), but I try to keep my faults from becoming what I've described above (at least the second one I can easily avoid. Hurting others is wrong, especially when you're not acting in self-defense, and I'd be hurting everybody at the company, not just the individual(s) who chose to let me go).

          The ego is harder to control. You get enough people saying you're awesome, they're glad to have you around, and it's difficult. It's doubly so when they can't do what you can do, and stuff that's easy for you is difficult to impossible for them. You have to struggle to remember that they can't do it because they don't have the same interest, and the stuff they do have the interest in? Yeah, you can't do it. They're just as good at different things.

          Anyway, back on track: Consider how much power you are giving these technology people before you allow them into your life. Be scared of it. Make them prove themselves worthy of your trust. Even once they have proven themselves worthy, put in place controls so that you maintain ultimate control, and can replace them. For instance, setting up separate accounts, and assigning passwords to them with privileges to do what you need them to do. Other things, as well (if you want a list, PM me with what you're hiring them to do, and I'll tell you what measures to take).

          Just, be careful. There's a lot of bad people in my profession. All too often, as a profession, we're not worthy of the trust that people place in us. I can only hope that, if you do get bitten like this, that someone will be able to help you recover as much as possible without getting hurt in the process. Well, at least getting hurt as little as possible.

          Now, I'll stop my rambling. Sorry for going on so long.

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          • #20
            Quoth Seraph
            I ended up sending him the document he wanted, because he got to the point last night that he told me if I didn't send it over, he was going to make my life miserable. So I spent an hour making a letter as airtight as possible, with the help of some great advice from Pedersen. Basically, I made sure to put some provisions into it that he wasn't relieved of liability until I confirmed everything was working up to the point he had claimed it was. He also at one point had "offered", before he got reaaallly hostile, to "help the new coder get settled in and to show them around". I included that in there too, that he has to do that.
            What he did is blackmail, and I'm pretty sure that makes the liability document worthless if you have any documentation that can back it up.

            You should consider talking to the local district attorney or the FBI and see what options you have. You may also have options in civil court, document or no document.
            They say that God only gives us what we can handle. Apparently, God thinks I'm a bad ass.

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            • #21
              I'll second what Pedersen said regarding techs and ego.

              I have encountered some very humble and honest people in this field, and I have encountered some very egotistical people who regarded laws and ethics as being only for other people. So far, unfortunately, the unethical egomaniacs are far more common.

              One business I did work for several years ago, when I just started doing this as more then a hobby. The techs there had a habit of copying any music, movies, pictures, etc that struck their fancy from client computers onto a central server in the store for later viewing/copying. The techs, boss/owner saw absolutely nothing wrong with this practice and couldn't understand why I said anything about it. I left employment there shortly afterwards figuring that being self employed and struggling would be better then being there. (The business environment was also very toxic, and unfortunately I am still de-toxing from that place despite being gone for so long.)
              Heard through the grapevine several months later that something happened and the police raided the shop and left with several computers. Final tally was a lot of fines, some jail time, etc. (Naughty pics of several customers underage daughters being amongst what was found by the police. From what was reported/grapevine, all the pics were self taken by the teens for boyfriends. But even having them is a major problem as far as the police are concerned.)

              Despite this, the business is still open, but I never see anyone in there when I go past and am now wondering if it's now a front for something else.


              At the current shop I am at, it amazes me the number of people who want to give me their email account information when the machine is in for a virus problem. They tend to look very surprised when I point out that unless they want me to look at any email problem, I don't need any account information. Just the password to get into the computer, if there is one (And I have tools to break that if needed).

              From this, we get a LOT of repeat business when there are problems. And have service contracts with a lot of the local businesses and more then a few of the local municipalities.

              Recently had a customer for a major client say that while <competing shop> is a lot cheaper then we are, we also know our stuff, and the client feels that their data is safe with us. At the end of the day, I've found that all I really have in this field is my reputation.

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              • #22
                Wow, this guy is really shady. I feel bad you had to go through this but it's certainly a lesson learned for future people you work with. It's just a damn shame that this is a lesson to begin with. People can be such revolting creatures.
                Getting offended is a great way to avoid answering questions that make you sound dumb. - exmocaptainmoroni

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                • #23
                  Quoth Panacea View Post
                  What he did is blackmail, and I'm pretty sure that makes the liability document worthless if you have any documentation that can back it up.

                  You should consider talking to the local district attorney or the FBI and see what options you have. You may also have options in civil court, document or no document.
                  I probably do, and I'm lucky that he told me all of this so helpfully on Skypechat. So I have lovely, lovely concrete records of who it is, and what he's saying.

                  Quoth Pedersen View Post
                  Just, be careful. There's a lot of bad people in my profession. All too often, as a profession, we're not worthy of the trust that people place in us. I can only hope that, if you do get bitten like this, that someone will be able to help you recover as much as possible without getting hurt in the process. Well, at least getting hurt as little as possible.
                  I don't like to think of where I'd be at the moment if you hadn't been there. I'm extremely lucky you came in with your sage advice when you did. <hugs>

                  Quoth bainsidhe View Post
                  I'd want to sue his ass for...something. Arrest him for blackmail, I dunno. I'm not a lawyer and not into computers, so I can't even imagine the backlash he could cause as a result. It's just I'm angry from reading this and can't imagine the pain you're being put through. What a sucky thing to happen and I'm glad the community is helping you.
                  I would, but
                  a) I still feel bad that he's become this, even though I ended our friendship, I'm still concerned about why he's acting like this.

                  b) In the industry I currently have most of my clients in, he can ruin my business. I've spent years working on a reputation, and I'm sad to say that the people in it are known to jump on any piece of gossip and destroy a person, no matter if its true or false. So I'd rather not poke the bear just yet.

                  c) To do that right now would be more stress than I need, what with life deciding I need another collective kick in the pants lol

                  If not for those, I'd be all over it. I'm extremely hurt by what he's done to me, especially after all the support I've given him over the years.
                  By popular request....I am now officially the Enemy of Normalcy.

                  "What is unobtainium? To Seraph, it's a normal client. :P" -- Observant Friend

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                  • #24
                    Quoth Pedersen View Post
                    For everybody else, please, take some advice from this story. Seraph got taken in by a coder that...

                    Anyway, back on track: Consider how much power you are giving these technology people before you allow them into your life. Be scared of it. Make them prove themselves worthy of your trust. Even once they have proven themselves worthy, put in place controls so that you maintain ultimate control, and can replace them. For instance, setting up separate accounts, and assigning passwords to them with privileges to do what you need them to do. Other things, as well (if you want a list, PM me with what you're hiring them to do, and I'll tell you what measures to take).
                    Ditto me, though Pedersen is more current in the computing industry than I am. Always remember that we have several techs in this group.

                    Second:
                    ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS keep backups of EVERYTHING you will need to get your computer back to working order, with all your current information.

                    If nothing else, keep backups of EVERYTHING you create: even if you don't think yourself a creative person, 'everything you create' includes your personal financial records, your family photos ... irreplaceable stuff.

                    Keep this records YOURSELF. Learn how to do that - it's not difficult, even for a non-tech - and learn how to put them back on a computer for yourself.

                    If you can do that, then the worst-case scenario is getting a new computer and starting from scratch. Okay?
                    Seshat's self-help guide:
                    1. Would you rather be right, or get the result you want?
                    2. If you're consistently getting results you don't want, change what you do.
                    3. Deal with the situation you have now, however it occurred.
                    4. Accept the consequences of your decisions.

                    "All I want is a pretty girl, a decent meal, and the right to shoot lightning at fools." - Anders, Dragon Age.

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