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The joys of abusive or percussive maintenance, or why don't people inform me?

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  • The joys of abusive or percussive maintenance, or why don't people inform me?

    <background>We have a server alarm system that plays a heartbeat noise when a server bombs, thanks to a cheeky Edgar Allen Poe loving coworker...(I love Poe too, but The Telltale Server is taking it a bit far. :-P)

    I wasn't informed when this noise was first changed from an electric shock noise that tended to put me on edge after 8 hours of hearing "ZZT!" every 3 seconds. I wandered into the data center, where the speakers are much more powerful and better sounding, plus have a sub sitting on the raised floor (that's important) to replace a dying hard drive. We use a cold/hot aisle setup in our data center, so most of the data center is hot, but the fronts of the servers are behind big doors, and that's where the AC is piped to.

    Under the raised floor: "LUBDUB"
    Me: "...what the..."
    Under the floor: "LUBDUB"
    *poke my head out of the cold aisle, see nothing and noone, go back to swapping drives*
    Under the floor: "LUBDUB"
    Me: O_O "I swear I didn't mean it Box276! You were so old! You had to be replaced!"
    Under the floor: "LUBDUB"
    *runs for the NOC*

    Apparently the sub sitting on the floor used the hollow space between raised floor and concrete slab as a resonance chamber, making me hear the sound from under the floor, instead of by the computer. :-D

    -----

    We also have a few servers that play mind games with me, will ring once, and quit by the time I glance over, or will ring for no real reason. I'm learning that being abusive works far better than a coworker's method of sweet talking the server into submission, for example:

    Box: "LUBDUB"
    Coworker: "sshhh...it's alright...be quiet..."
    box: "LUBDUB"
    Coworker: (Even more soothingly) "sshhhh...it'll be ok."
    Box: "LUBDUB"
    Me: "Oh f*cking shut the hell up!"
    Box: "..."

    Example 2:

    Box: "LUBDUB"
    Me: "No! Shut the hell up!"
    Box: "..."
    Coworker: Distro of choice?
    Me: Gentoo.
    Coworker: Ahh. A Masochist. I thought so.

  • #2
    Would you mind coming with me to work and computer whispering the tower that sounds like a jet taking off?!?!?! PLEASE!! I wanna kick that damn thing.

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    • #3
      Quoth Amina516 View Post
      Would you mind coming with me to work and computer whispering the tower that sounds like a jet taking off?!?!?! PLEASE!! I wanna kick that damn thing.
      When my tower was making annoying sounds, kicking it usually fixed it.
      The High Priest is an Illusion!

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      • #4
        Toaster Ovens! Programmable Toaster Ovens! Do you hear me!? --Bannana 5000 tech, Bloom County
        The Rich keep getting richer because they keep doing what it was that made them rich. Ditto the Poor.
        "Hy kan tell dey is schmot qvestions, dey is makink my head hurt."
        Hoc spatio locantur.

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        • #5
          Quoth Midorikawa View Post
          I'm learning that being abusive works far better than a coworker's method of sweet talking the server into submission, for example:

          Box: "LUBDUB"
          Coworker: "sshhh...it's alright...be quiet..."
          box: "LUBDUB"
          Coworker: (Even more soothingly) "sshhhh...it'll be ok."
          Box: "LUBDUB"
          Me: "Oh f*cking shut the hell up!"
          Box: "..."
          The computers and anything electronic in our assorted households (mom/dad/relatives) always seem to respond better to my snarling at them than anybody else sweet-talking the things. Dad's computer will mysteriously start behaving when he calls me up....of course, since this means an error will never duplicate itself when I'm able to see it that box still has a few issues we're both not sure what's going on.
          "I am quite confident that I do exist."
          "Excuse me, I'm making perfect sense. You're just not keeping up." The Doctor

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          • #6
            Quoth Dreamstalker View Post
            The computers and anything electronic in our assorted households (mom/dad/relatives) always seem to respond better to my snarling at them than anybody else sweet-talking the things.
            See...Coworker in that story is superstitious. He believes that if you yell at the server or are abusive, they realize "wait...there's 600 of us, and 1 or 2 of them. Let's take 'em!"

            I've seen both sides, but it seems they fear me a bit more than they do him for some reason.
            Coworker: Distro of choice?
            Me: Gentoo.
            Coworker: Ahh. A Masochist. I thought so.

            Comment


            • #7
              Quoth Dreamstalker View Post
              The computers and anything electronic in our assorted households (mom/dad/relatives) always seem to respond better to my snarling at them than anybody else sweet-talking the things.
              My computers seem to respond to verbal threats. A recent encounter between Me and one of my computers, called MDD.

              Me: Presses power button on MDD
              MDD: ...
              Me: Come on MDD, please, boot! presses power button
              MDD: ...
              Me: Really? Come on... ****ing boot already! Don't make me reset you! power button
              MDD: ...
              Me: If you do not boot THIS INSTANT, I SWEAR TO HECK I WILL PUT YOUR PARTS ON eBay! power button
              MDD: ... "BOOOONG!" "Boot Menu. Press X for Mac OS X or L for Linux" press x Welcome to Mac OS X
              Me:

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              • #8
                I usually threaten to take my computers outside & introduce them to Mr Sledgehammer when they misbehave... can be scarily effective
                Arp happens!

                Just when I was getting used to yesterday, along came today.

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                • #9
                  I always did figure my PCs were scared of me because I wasn't afraid to take them apart.
                  1129. I will refrain from casting Dimension Jump and Magnificent Mansion on every police box we pass.
                  -----
                  http://orchidcolors.livejournal.com (A blog about everything and nothing)

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    back when I was in IT I took it a step further. I threatened (over the phone) the computers (PC's, IBM S/36's and register POS systems) with, at the very least strapping several M-80's or better to said misbehaving computer OR dropping them off a 100 foot cliff. they ususally started to work after said threat.

                    I guess I must have the magic threat touch
                    I'm lost without a paddle and headed up SH*T creek.
                    -- Life Sucks Then You Die.


                    "I'll believe corp. are people when Texas executes one."

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                    • #11
                      Quoth Cazzi View Post
                      I usually threaten to take my computers outside & introduce them to Mr Sledgehammer when they misbehave... can be scarily effective
                      It's also a good way to work off some energy. But, to really beat the shit out of something...you need a 40-pound fence maul. There's nothing greater, than turning the object of frustration into a pile of scrap In fact, after having to constantly fix my father's Crapaq, I did beat the shit out of it. What can I say, other than I got tired of getting yelled at because it "wasn't working right." Well, duh...that's what happens when you don't update your virus defs, and have 50% of your browser filled with useless toolbars. I salvaged what I could, and then beat the shit out of it. Why not?
                      Attached Files
                      Aerodynamics are for people who can't build engines. --Enzo Ferrari

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                      • #12
                        Quoth Dreamstalker View Post
                        Dad's computer will mysteriously start behaving when he calls me up....of course, since this means an error will never duplicate itself when I'm able to see it that box still has a few issues we're both not sure what's going on.
                        I get this at work all the time. One of my co-irkers makes a point of asking me to help with devices that aren't working specifically because more often than not, just my walking up will cause them to suddenly start working again.

                        I had a CD that would only play if I was the one that pushed the button on the CD player. It wouldn't work for anyone else that I knew.

                        ^-.-^
                        Faith is about what you do. It's about aspiring to be better and nobler and kinder than you are. It's about making sacrifices for the good of others. - Dresden

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                        • #13
                          "Howdy doodly do. How's it going? I'm Talkie, Talkie Toaster, your chirpy breakfast companion. Talkie's the name, toasting's the game. Anyone like any toast?"
                          Bark like a chicken!

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                          • #14
                            Quoth Skeksin View Post
                            "Howdy doodly do. How's it going? I'm Talkie, Talkie Toaster, your chirpy breakfast companion. Talkie's the name, toasting's the game. Anyone like any toast?"
                            I love Red Dwarf, I am going to name my Rorqual Red Dwarf =)
                            EVE Online: 99% of the time you sit around waiting for something to happen, but that 1% of action is what hooks people like crack, you don't get interviewed by the BBC for a WoW raid.

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                            • #15
                              Quoth Geek King View Post
                              Toaster Ovens! Programmable Toaster Ovens! Do you hear me!? --Bannana 5000 tech, Bloom County
                              I love Bloom County. Berkeley Breathed is the reason that I call all penguins "Opus".

                              And I want this - http://www.berkeleybreathed.com/page...oomlibrary.asp
                              It's floating wicker propelled by fire!

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