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  • Don't make this about YOUR illness.... :(

    So family have been up to things the last week or so. I basically got accused of not giving them a standing ovation for something they were experiencing.

    I explained that due to where I am at the moment (aka. even getting out of bed isn't a certainty) whilst I saw their message I didn't reply because of how I was feeling. That I am glad that they enjoyed it. Implication: That day I couldn't say nice things so said nothing.

    I then got a shitty response that I was making it about my illness. And demanding more "respect".

    I explain and then I get kicked in the teeth for doing so. Great.
    I am so SO glad I was not present for this. There would have been an unpleasant duct tape incident. - Joi

  • #2
    "Well bless your heart!"



    I'm sorry family is being sucky.

    Comment


    • #3
      Thanks Akasa.

      I've been told more: Said "good event" didn't go as well as family member would have liked. Consider it a job interview and on weighing all the issues family member decided they wouldn't take the job.

      However rather than telling me that they told someone that only a week ago they wanted to hurt and hated. And attacked me for other stuff that has no basis.
      I am so SO glad I was not present for this. There would have been an unpleasant duct tape incident. - Joi

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      • #4
        *hugs* that sucks that they went after you like that
        "Man, having a conversation with you is like walking through a salvador dali painting." - Mac Hall

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        • #5
          Quoth Gizmo View Post
          I then got a shitty response that I was making it about my illness. And demanding more "respect".
          People that demand my respect while showing little to me get a surprise. I tell them "Respect is a two way street and you need to show respect for it to be given. You are not showing me respect so you have no right to demand it now."

          I'm sorry to hear that you have to deal with this kind of childish behavior. Try not to let them get to you. They clearly don't understand what you are going through and only care about themselves.

          Comment


          • #6
            What Arcus said. Those who show no respect, deserve none.

            If their responses are typically along those lines, you may wish to consider simply not answering their texts.
            "For a musician, the SNES sound engine is like using Crayola Crayons. Nobuo Uematsu used Crayola Crayons to paint the Sistine Chapel." - Jeremy Jahns (re: "Dancing Mad")
            "The difference between an amateur and a master is that the master has failed way more times." - JoCat
            "Thinking is difficult, therefore let the herd pronounce judgment!" ~ Carl Jung
            "There's burning bridges, and then there's the lake just to fill it with gasoline." - Wiccy, reddit
            "Retail is a cruel master, and could very well be the most educational time of many people's lives, in its own twisted way." - me
            "Love keeps her in the air when she oughta fall down...tell you she's hurtin' 'fore she keens...makes her a home." - Capt. Malcolm Reynolds, "Serenity" (2005)
            Acts of Gord – Read it, Learn it, Love it!
            "Our psychic powers only work if the customer has a mind to read." - me

            Comment


            • #7
              Normally this person is sane and .... ok.

              And yeah, everyone whose demanded 'respect' from me lately has done so during a hissy fit saying basically "ME ME ME". Which is tantamount to *asking* me to slam a door into their face.

              I have blocked them right now. And they haven't tried other kinds of contact. It does help a mutual contact has kinda said "ENOUGH". Once it simmers down then we will sort this out but right now? I'm protecting ME.

              Yeah, maybe not being wonderfully congratulatory was a small lack of respect but my explanation *was* respectful. And their response and the fact they are still hiding the real issues from me? Isn't.

              Thanks all. Its hard sometimes being unbiased about stuff like this. All too easy to feel at fault entirely. Luckily I do have a few people around me who aren't scared to tell me the truth even if I won't like it - and they know I'll respect that and take it on board. *hugs*
              I am so SO glad I was not present for this. There would have been an unpleasant duct tape incident. - Joi

              Comment


              • #8
                Never feel bad about explaining yourself -- you simply told the truth, and they CHOSE to twist the words into something they could complain about, which suggests that it really didn't matter what you said; they just wanted an excuse to complain. As someone who is laid up right now, you're an easy target.
                "For a musician, the SNES sound engine is like using Crayola Crayons. Nobuo Uematsu used Crayola Crayons to paint the Sistine Chapel." - Jeremy Jahns (re: "Dancing Mad")
                "The difference between an amateur and a master is that the master has failed way more times." - JoCat
                "Thinking is difficult, therefore let the herd pronounce judgment!" ~ Carl Jung
                "There's burning bridges, and then there's the lake just to fill it with gasoline." - Wiccy, reddit
                "Retail is a cruel master, and could very well be the most educational time of many people's lives, in its own twisted way." - me
                "Love keeps her in the air when she oughta fall down...tell you she's hurtin' 'fore she keens...makes her a home." - Capt. Malcolm Reynolds, "Serenity" (2005)
                Acts of Gord – Read it, Learn it, Love it!
                "Our psychic powers only work if the customer has a mind to read." - me

                Comment


                • #9
                  I'm sorry people are being mean *hugs you*
                  1129. I will refrain from casting Dimension Jump and Magnificent Mansion on every police box we pass.
                  -----
                  http://orchidcolors.livejournal.com (A blog about everything and nothing)

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    I've had to come to the realisation that many people don't want explanations. So for many people, I just say "I'm sorry, I wasn't able to do X" or "I won't be able to do X" as appropriate. No explanation. Just a 'No'.
                    Seshat's self-help guide:
                    1. Would you rather be right, or get the result you want?
                    2. If you're consistently getting results you don't want, change what you do.
                    3. Deal with the situation you have now, however it occurred.
                    4. Accept the consequences of your decisions.

                    "All I want is a pretty girl, a decent meal, and the right to shoot lightning at fools." - Anders, Dragon Age.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Bumping this: said family member has told the person they hate (and set it to show on FB too so not likely a hoax) that they have had a major life event in the last week.

                      Didn't contact me at all and didn't even bother with even a happy birthday text.

                      They want to write me off? fine. I'm not going to be scurrying to apologise or contact them.
                      I am so SO glad I was not present for this. There would have been an unpleasant duct tape incident. - Joi

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