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The joys of parenthood-Teenage boy edition

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  • The joys of parenthood-Teenage boy edition

    The good news is that it seems I'm raising responsible young men.

    The bad news is that I found my condom supply completely depleted.

    I'm not ready for this yet!

    Last edited by mathnerd; 06-21-2014, 12:42 AM.
    At the conclusion of an Irish wedding, the priest said "Everybody please hug the person who has made your life worth living. The bartender was nearly crushed to death.

  • #2
    at least you havent found the porn stash like my parents did.... seriously if my parents don't know im gay im surprised

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    • #3
      It's internet porn these days, and we had that discussion a couple years ago, after I realized that my oldest had gotten through the password protections on my laptop and I went through the browser history.
      At the conclusion of an Irish wedding, the priest said "Everybody please hug the person who has made your life worth living. The bartender was nearly crushed to death.

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      • #4
        A simple triage evaluation: Which is worse if they get knocked up?
        A) Yer girlfriend
        B) Yo momma



        Kid I knew, his little brother found his stash, blew them up as balloons, and left them all over the house... about 1967 ... Daddy was a knacker ...
        I am not an a**hole. I am a hemorrhoid. I irritate a**holes!
        Procrastination: Forward planning to insure there is something to do tomorrow.
        Derails threads faster than a pocket nuke.

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        • #5
          My sympathies! At least he's using them...
          When you start at zero, everything's progress.

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          • #6
            The discussion I had with him pretty much boiled down to two things:

            1) Taking stuff without permission is stealing, and that's uncool.
            2) If you're not mature enough to buy the condoms yourself, or at least ask me to buy them for you, you're not mature enough to be having sex.

            ETA: Yes, the part about "at least you're using them", did get mentioned. If there's a sliver lining, this is it.
            At the conclusion of an Irish wedding, the priest said "Everybody please hug the person who has made your life worth living. The bartender was nearly crushed to death.

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            • #7
              Good points, all...
              When you start at zero, everything's progress.

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              • #8
                Quoth mathnerd View Post
                1) Taking stuff without permission is stealing, and that's uncool.
                2) If you're not mature enough to buy the condoms yourself, or at least ask me to buy them for you, you're not mature enough to be having sex.
                Yeah, I can see maybe nicking a couple because whoops, things are getting hot and heavy here and we need something now, but after that go freakin buy your own. And put a couple back to replace what you used.

                Sorry you had to find out the way you did. But at least you didn't walk in on anyone. That would have been no fun for anyone involved.
                I am no longer of capable of the emotion you humans call “compassion”. Though I can feign it in exchange for an hourly wage. (Gravekeeper)

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                • #9
                  At least that's not as bad as one I heard about regarding a teenage girl and her mother. Teenage girl was having sex, wanted to protect herself, but didn't want her mother to find out. This was in a less paranoid age, when BCP packaging was similar in concept to the Duracell hearing aid battery dispenser (i.e. could be reloaded), rather than the current tamper-evident blister packs.

                  Teenage girl took her mother's birth control pills, replacing them with baby aspirin (roughly same size and colour). Cue teenage girl acquiring an unexpected sibling.
                  Any fool can piss on the floor. It takes a talented SC to shit on the ceiling.

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                  • #10
                    Oh, man. There's no way I could handle another kid. I have my hands full with the three I have! I did have my tubes tied, but as I found out the hard way not to terribly long ago, the failure rate of tubal ligations skyrockets after 10 years.

                    But yeah, it could have been much worse.
                    At the conclusion of an Irish wedding, the priest said "Everybody please hug the person who has made your life worth living. The bartender was nearly crushed to death.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      If there's a family planning centre or a youth health clinic nearby, or even some youth services, see if they will provide free condoms to people. The health clinic near my house did (they also sell female condoms on request) prior to being revamped completely, while the university, some high schools and some youth centres will provide free condoms in bowls for students to take.
                      The best professors are mad scientists! -Zoom

                      Now queen of USSR-Land...

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                      • #12
                        Not sure if they still do it, but when I was in college it seemed like Durex and Trojan were competing to see who could give schools the most free rubbers. Weekly shipments coming in, cases upon cases.

                        Heck, one time we got a friggin pallet of cases of durex, something like 80 cases, 1000 rubbers to a case. Nevermind that the student body was only around 1500. And that was only one month!

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                        • #13
                          Quoth BearLeeBadenaugh View Post
                          Not sure if they still do it, but when I was in college it seemed like Durex and Trojan were competing to see who could give schools the most free rubbers. Weekly shipments coming in, cases upon cases.

                          Heck, one time we got a friggin pallet of cases of durex, something like 80 cases, 1000 rubbers to a case. Nevermind that the student body was only around 1500. And that was only one month!
                          Don't worry, I can go one better.

                          Apparently during one round of the Olympics (I believe it was the Vancouver games), they shipped 100,000 condoms to the village. It wasn't enough.
                          Last edited by fireheart; 06-21-2014, 11:53 AM.
                          The best professors are mad scientists! -Zoom

                          Now queen of USSR-Land...

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Congratulations on raising a responsible and sensible young'un.

                            Put condoms on the shopping list. Or yes, take kiddo with you to the nearest clinic that gives out free condoms, and make sure he knows how to get there.
                            Seshat's self-help guide:
                            1. Would you rather be right, or get the result you want?
                            2. If you're consistently getting results you don't want, change what you do.
                            3. Deal with the situation you have now, however it occurred.
                            4. Accept the consequences of your decisions.

                            "All I want is a pretty girl, a decent meal, and the right to shoot lightning at fools." - Anders, Dragon Age.

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                            • #15
                              Speaking of the free clinic, may I also suggest taking him there if they hold safe sex sessions if you haven't had the "talk" already? (or his school hasn't) Some sex ed programs don't progress beyond "this is a condom, this is how you use it, don't have sex without it."
                              The best professors are mad scientists! -Zoom

                              Now queen of USSR-Land...

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