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How about you learn to READ?!

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  • How about you learn to READ?!

    You know, I thought I was immune to being on the receiving end of customer stupidity...I was wrong. It would appear that if I am in my company uniform, I’m gonna get irritated by someone. It’s normally just either someone who is upset with our company trying to make a point, in which case, when I am satnding in a line I hear “Urgh. [company name] they piss me off because...” at which point I usually respond with “I’m off duty, come back when I am at work and I’ll take care of it” (Read: “I don’t give a damn when I’m ON duty much less off”) or I’ll get mistaken for an employee of whichever store I’m in. Usually that’s either Ikea, Tesco, Comet, Maplin electronics or another store which is part of our company but is a different chain. It’s an easy mistake to make, I guess, since our uniforms are TOTALLY DIFFERENT

    So I’m in Tescos today, and I walk up to the self-service checkout with my bottle of pop. The guy behind me is struggleing with the checkout he is using, but I no longer care enough about the public to help him.

    TC: Tescos Customer
    Me

    TC: Excuse me? Coulp you help me with this?
    Me: *Looks over, sees the machine says “Please wait for assistance” * Nah, sorry mate. I don’t work here
    TC: Don’t lie, you can help me.
    Me: No, I can’t. I don’t work here
    TC: You don’t?

    Please bear in mind that my uniform has the company logo on the front pocket, the website above that, the website across my back and a smaller version of the logo between my shoulders, not to mention my shirt looks totally different to the uniform of tesco employees

    Me: Nope.
    TC: Oh, Yes, I see your uniform is that of the computer store.
    Me: Yep *Pulls his wallet out and scans my clubcard*
    TC: so you CAN help me then
    Me: ...No, I can’t *Discreetly checks to see if my name bade is on...no. Its not. Good*
    TC: Why Not?
    Me: because I am a tech for (company name) not a checkout person for Tesco. One will probably be here in a minute
    TC: Well, thats not good enough. You should be able to help me with this if you’re a tech
    Me: I’m not a tech for tescos
    TC: Well, you’re not a very good tech if you don’t know how to work something as simple as a till
    Me: Look, idiot. Don’t think for one second that trying to slate me is going to make me want to help you. *I notice him scanning my top for a name badge* and don’t think you’ll find my badge either, it’s in my car. I used to deal with fuckwitts like you all the time when I worked in my last job, and I’m gonna let you into a little secret; You think that kicking and screaming at the nearest person who looks like they might work somewhere is going to get you served faster. It doesn’t work like that. Now, get this through you thick skull, I can’t help you....and damn sure that even if I can, I ain’t going to. Leave me alone *Picks up my bottle of pop, Grabs my change and starts walking away*
    Checkout machine: Thank you for shopping at Tesco
    TC: I’ll be making a complaint about you with your manager
    Me: Go ahead. I work at the store 15 miles from here (I don’t, I just felt like sending him 15 miles out of his way to complain) but I’ll get there before you, and I’ll be able to forewarn my managers and branch call handling that it’s a false complaint *Turns around and walks away*

    The security guard gave me a smile and a nod as I walked out to which I smiled back

    Thing is, the guy then followed me out. Not to my car, but to his car, so; knowing what traffic was going to be like, I drove in the opposite direction to where I work and he followed me...so I got onto the flyover headed for the motorway and sure enough, he’s following me.

    I passed the speed camera just below the speed limit, then I floored it, watching in my rear-view mirror as I heard the engine start to spin-up. He’s still there but Perfect, there’s an off-ramp for the fly-over coming up and there’s a lorry in front. If I can get in front of that lorry, I should be just in time to shoot off the fly-over and down that off-ramp. He’ll not notice because the lorry was a wide one and will block his view. I pulled out, Keeping my foot down, then shot just in front of that lorry (P.S My apologies to that Asda lorry driver, if you are reading this) and down the off-ramp. I looked back just in time to see that arsehole glare daggers at me hehee. The next junction for him to get off and turn around was about another 3 miles away, so he would have to drive up there and back, burning up petrol which may well run short in this country in a few days. Heheheee.
    Last edited by AdvancedFlea; 07-07-2008, 09:16 PM.
    -The one, The Only, AdvancedFlea-

    Stick that in your blog and smoke it.

    A guide for customers about retail

  • #2
    Quoth AdvancedFlea View Post
    You know, I thought I was immune to being on the receiving end of customer stupidity...
    I think I found the root of your problem


    Seriously though. Some people are just insane. And whats with following you, thats just dangerous and asking fro something bad to happen. For all he knows you could be some loony psycho who would bodily harm him in someway (although for all I know you may have if he actually succeeded in following you, and you would be justified for it).

    Comment


    • #3
      I have no idea what that guys problem was...other than basic, flat-out stupidity.

      yeah, I have a nasty tendancy to just say whatever pops into my head somtimes, this has included saying to a customer "Yeah, basically you're computer's Knackered, Mate"
      -The one, The Only, AdvancedFlea-

      Stick that in your blog and smoke it.

      A guide for customers about retail

      Comment


      • #4
        I can't help you. I don't work here.

        "But can't you just-"

        No. I don't work here. I am sure someone who does will be along shortly, but I don't work here.

        "But all I want is for you to-"

        NO. I. Don't. Work. Here. Can't you get that through your head? You can sit there and whine and pout and say I don't know what I'm doing because I won't help you, but the fact of the matter is, mate, that I know exactly what I'm doing, and what that is is Not Working, which means I don't have to help you, I won't help you, I don't work here so I have no obligation to help you, if I did work here I am off the clock so I still would have no obligation to help you, and since I do not work here and you have no idea where I work, I am not even going to pretend to be nice to you, so feel free to shut the fuck up, wait for some help from people who DO work here, leave me the fuck alone, and shove your comments straight up your ass. At least there they'll be closer to the sorry excuse of a pinhead masquerading as your fucking brain.

        "The Customer Is Always Right...But The Bartender Decides Who Is
        Still A Customer."

        Comment


        • #5
          I used to do that all the time; tell people I don't work somewhere. Particularly Wally World. Gah... the madness....
          Ridiculous 2009 Predictions: Evil Queen will beat Martha Stewart to death with a muffin pan. All hail Evil Queen! (Some things don't need elaboration.....) -- Jester

          Ridiculous 2010 Predictions: Evil Queen, after escaping prison for last years prediction, goes out and waffle irons Rachel Ray to death. -- SG15Z

          Ridiculous 2011 Prediction: Evil Queen will beat Gordon Ramsay over the head with a cast-iron skillet. -- FireHeart

          Comment


          • #6
            Quoth Jester View Post
            I can't help you. I don't work here.


            ...
            dear lor YES, that is what I should have said!!

            Quoth Evil Queen View Post
            I used to do that all the time; tell people I don't work somewhere. Particularly Wally World. Gah... the madness....
            I shoudl try telling people I don;t work at the place I actualy work at
            -The one, The Only, AdvancedFlea-

            Stick that in your blog and smoke it.

            A guide for customers about retail

            Comment


            • #7
              Quoth AdvancedFlea View Post
              I shoudl try telling people I don;t work at the place I actually work at
              I usually wear my work shirt to wally world (it's dark blue, but has the hotel logo above the breast pocket) so I can understand the people who think I work there. It's the ones that try to convince me I do that really get to me.
              Ridiculous 2009 Predictions: Evil Queen will beat Martha Stewart to death with a muffin pan. All hail Evil Queen! (Some things don't need elaboration.....) -- Jester

              Ridiculous 2010 Predictions: Evil Queen, after escaping prison for last years prediction, goes out and waffle irons Rachel Ray to death. -- SG15Z

              Ridiculous 2011 Prediction: Evil Queen will beat Gordon Ramsay over the head with a cast-iron skillet. -- FireHeart

              Comment


              • #8
                When my BF worked at Best Buy I used to have people thinking I worked there all the time. Note, this is when I was wearing bondage pants or something else decidedly NOT THE UNIFORM and, in case anyone here is not familiar with BBY, all the regular CSRs there wear blue polo shirts and khakis of doom.

                To the adverse of this, during my stint at CCity, people didn't know I worked there (though, to their credit, our uniforms were very, very different from that of the average CCity employee and far more relaxed).

                It was amusing having people trying to figure out how to distinguish us from customers, when all they had to do was look for a name tag or the frikken computers attached to our hands...
                6/16/2008: Best. Day. Ever.

                Things I've Learned: Birth is not a miracle, it's a science, and science is damned disgusting. It's also really, really, cool.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Quoth Evil Queen View Post
                  It's the ones that try to convince me I do that really get to me.
                  Those are the ones that get to me too. they REALLY piss me off. I'm like" *Urge to kill rising* NO, I DON'T Work at this store, I work across the road, idiot"

                  Quoth Pixagi View Post

                  It was amusing having people trying to figure out how to distinguish us from customers, when all they had to do was look for a name tag or the frikken computers attached to our hands...
                  our store once had an out-of-uniform day for sporting relief. you could come in whatever you liked as long as it was somthing to do with sports (guess who showed up in full hockey gear, rollerblades, mask and all hehee) all we had on was our name tags...customers had NO clue who we were XD
                  -The one, The Only, AdvancedFlea-

                  Stick that in your blog and smoke it.

                  A guide for customers about retail

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Haha, while it IS funny that you told that guy off and eluded him from a rage chase, is it possible for a guy like that to call up YOUR company and complain how you treated him while still in their(your company's) uniform?

                    I'm just curious, because it would suck to suffer from the repercussions of that, even if you WERE off the clock.

                    Still giggling , though

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Quoth Meegz View Post
                      Haha, while it IS funny that you told that guy off and eluded him from a rage chase, is it possible for a guy like that to call up YOUR company and complain how you treated him while still in their(your company's) uniform?

                      I'm just curious, because it would suck to suffer from the repercussions of that, even if you WERE off the clock.

                      Still giggling , though
                      Yes, It's generally knowen as bringing the company into disrepute and with most companies, it's grounds for dismissal for "gross misconduct" However, I knwo the assistant manager of said Tesco store who will back me if I say "I never argued with that guy"
                      -The one, The Only, AdvancedFlea-

                      Stick that in your blog and smoke it.

                      A guide for customers about retail

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        If I need to do some shopping at my store after work, I'll run home, clean up a bit, change clothes and then go.

                        Co-workers make fun of me for doing this, but I do it so people won't be asking me for help when I'm off the clock.

                        Still, it doesn't always work.
                        Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.

                        "I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost daily

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Quoth Irving Patrick Freleigh View Post
                          If I need to do some shopping at my store after work, I'll run home, clean up a bit, change clothes and then go.
                          if I need to shop in our store, I allways have a jacket in the car, I get searched-out, grab it from the car's boot, then come back in wearing it. works 99 times out of 100
                          -The one, The Only, AdvancedFlea-

                          Stick that in your blog and smoke it.

                          A guide for customers about retail

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Am I the only one thinking that since his till was telling him to wait for employee assistance, there would be some sort of employee/authorization code involved? In which case, even if you knew what the problem was, it wouldn't do him any good anyway...
                            I don't go in for ancient wisdom
                            I don't believe just 'cause ideas are tenacious
                            It means that they're worthy - Tim Minchin, "White Wine in the Sun"

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Quoth BookstoreEscapee View Post
                              Am I the only one thinking that since his till was telling him to wait for employee assistance, there would be some sort of employee/authorization code involved? In which case, even if you knew what the problem was, it wouldn't do him any good anyway...
                              you are right in thinking that. I dunno why it was telling him he needed assistance (probibly because he was too stupid to work it, I am guessing) but I've had it pop up on me when I want to buy age-restricted products. The machine says "Please wait for assistance" the light above your head flashes red and someone usually comes over pretty quickly. just not this time because the guy who was watching the self-serve tills was away for some reason.
                              -The one, The Only, AdvancedFlea-

                              Stick that in your blog and smoke it.

                              A guide for customers about retail

                              Comment

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