Wherein I make snarky comments about Christmas Music

[BrenDAnn]

All I'm gonna say is I am SO glad the C-Store doesn't have an overheard music system to play the same Christmas songs over and over again through. It's bad enough without that going on, really! Just walking around in the malls this time of year rather irritates me. I can't imagine having to be subjected to it all day long!

[MoonCat]

There are actually dozens of Christmas songs...well, hell, there are probably hundreds, if you count all the silly ones, the ancient ones and the newer ones. That's why it's so frustrating when the stores keep playing the same stuff over and over.

Last year when my sis worked at Kohl's she wanted to kill something because they kept playing Justin Bieber. But then they'd play "I want an alien for Christmas" which she loved.

The other day I bought an MP3 album of Polish Christmas carols. No, I don't understand most of it, but who cares? Reminds me of my grandparents.

[Despina83]

I am SO sick of listening to non-stop christmas music at my store that I could stab myself in the head. Goddamn, how many different versions of "Frosty The Snowman" do we have to hear?? And "It's The Most Wonderful Time of the Year" is another one that gets beaten to DEATH. I can't stand it anymore. "And though it's been said many, times many ways..." Yes, many, many MANY times!! The music we normally play is usually grating enough (I want to murder everyone in the vicinity when "I Can See Clearly Now" plays), but this christmas music was getting old back in November.

[LillFilly]

My coworker and I have re-written several holiday songs with horrible, violent, vulgar, non-politically correct lyrics in order to preserve our sanity I can't divulge them here or I would probably be banned!

[Dreamstalker]

A classmate in my Criminal Investigations class, on hearing from the professor that the increase in violent crime during the holidays is NOT an urban myth (maybe it's connected to the deluge of bad Christmas songs?), came up with this:

"And the .45s keep ringing,
Happy Homicide to you!"

I was going to help him write out the rest of the song and submit it with our group's final exam, but that kinda lost steam.

[BeenThereDoneThat]

At least this is one thing you don't have to worry much about at a call center, unless you happen to be on hold a lot...and even then not all the hold music is Christmas themed.

I heard "Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer" for the FIRST TIME this season just under a week ago, amazingly enough....of course I've heard it about 3 times since, but at least it's edgy...kinda. Also, Feliz Navidad does get very old but this year I've been enjoying it...no clue why.

I bought a Trans-Siberian Orchestra CD this year, "The Lost Christmas Eve"...it's pretty good, but I didn't expect all the vocals. I still personally prefer Mannheim Steamroller. And Weird Al.

[BroSCFischer]

MS: We wish you a Merry Christmas x3, and a happy New Year.

Okay okay! I promise my Christmas will be Merry, now please SHUT UP. It will, I swear.

MS: Now bring us some figgy pudding x3, and a cup of good cheer.

Buwuh??????

"Now bring us some figgy pudding...We won't leave until we get some."

Who the FUCK are you telling me what to do? I've got some figgy pudding. Just look down the barrel of this shotgun. You might find some.

I HATE that X-mas song.

I also have developed a new found hatred for "The War is Over". Y'know "And so this is Christmas/and what have you done... etc.) It came from hearing it in my car 7 times in 3 weeks. sometimes twice within 24 hours.

Merry (Happy) Christmas = Feliz Navidad
prospero año y felicidad = Prosperous year and happiness (felicity)

Quiero desearles una Feliz Navidad, desde el fondo de mi corazón= I want to wish you a Merry Christmas, from the bottom of my heart.

SC

[Lady_Pigeon]

You guys want edgy? Try The Chimney Song. Best Xmas song ever. *EG*

[CaptainThrifty]

MS: Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock

Okay song, quite the creative suggestion you have there. Certainly walking through mall holding a holiday-themed boulder would be an interesting weapon of choice. A+ for creativity.

DM: You are walking through the mall when suddenly there appears a jingle bell rock.

Me: I pull out my +4 Dwarven battle hammer, StoneShatter, and scream madly as I charge it!


Sorry, had to. That was the mental image I had reading that bit.

[cinema guy]

One of my favorite Bob Rivers Christmas songs is O Little Town Of Bethlehem sung to the tune of House Of The Rising Sun. A couple of others are The Restroom Door Said Gentlemen and Rummy Rocker Boy.

My girlfriend introduced me to Walkin Round in Women's Under Wear.

No, not like that. You pervs!

[fireheart]

My local game store near home (and its sister store at Big Shiny Mall) both have techno versions of Christmas songs. They sound great and really fit in with the store as a whole. Until I talked to one of the guys behind the counter and he said that they get about 5 version of "Last Christmas".

That song as a whole, is enough for me to want to throw something at the mall speakers.

[HappyFun Ball]

My favorite Christmas song: Dead, dead, dead


Seriously go to playlist.com and give it a listen

If you want edgy, or just downright offensive, listen to the uncensored version of "The most offensive Christmas song ever."


I concur with ya'lls figgy pudding sentiments, Im like "Fuck you, go get your own Goddamned figgy pudding.. What kind of happy assholes are you eating that crap anyways? Oh? You're not leaving till you get some? Well you can just march right into the kitchen and do the dishes.. If you're gonna stay, you're gonna work!"

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Figgy pudding is high in cholesterol anyway. >.>

Anyhow, now that I've finished my last shift of the holiday season and Christmas can suck on my sack full of not toys, please join me in regaling everybody with my two favorite Holiday carols.

Both of them named Fuck Christmas.

[Mytical]

A song, no matter what you might think about it the first few times you hear it, will eventually get to the point it incites murderous rage if you hear it often enough.

I will use the song Achy Breaky Heart. I will admit..when it first came out, I thought it was catchy...for the first thousand times I heard it. The next 6 billion, 319 million, 578 times I heard it just crushed any chance of me ever liking the song (ok that is an exaggeration on how many times I heard it, probably wasn't more then a billion times). Every day to and from school somebody had a stereo and played that blasted song over and over. Only lasted a few months, and only a few hours each time..so hearing it for months on end every year..yeah that would bring visions of me blowing up the speakers..at the very least.

[Ghel]

I know I mentioned it on the other Christmas music thread, but my boss had me load her personal music collection onto the lobby computer and it's been playing there ever since. It's the same 12 songs done by 6 different country music artists. Christmas with a southern drawl and a steel guitar. I want to shoot myself.