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Slang and catch phrases -- what are yours?

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  • #16
    Quoth dragon_wings View Post
    tropicsgoddess reminded me of another:
    Occasionally, when really pissed/frustration/tired I'll say 'fuck me sideways'
    Usually followed by roomie saying something to the effect: wouldn't that be painful?
    BFF likes to say "fuck me sideways with a spoon"
    Knowledge is knowing that a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

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    • #17
      I forgot the one I use most often: holy moly! I don't even know where I got it from, and people around me have begun to pick it up.
      "Is it hot in here to you? It's very warm, isn't it?"--Nero, probably

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      • #18
        My most common catch-phrase is offering to assist a person/object to go fornicate themselves in an inconvenient orifice with several large sharp objects in an improbable manner. It's the best way to let off steam because everyone around me is usually laughing so hard that I can't avoid joining in OR they have such interesting looks on their faces that I'm immediately cheered up.
        Don't tempt pixies, it never ends well.

        Avatar created by the lovely Eisa.

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        • #19
          I stole "Fuuuck me!" from Sebastian on Cruel Intentions, used like the "Fuck me sideways" you all have mentioned.

          "Holy hell"--used to show shock/as an exclamation, example "Holy hell, it's cold outside!"

          I also use Meh. A lot.

          "What the actual fuck?" has made its way into my vocabulary.

          "Really? I mean REALLY?" is one I've started saying a lot lately too.

          Tig Tig--Cute name for my cat, Tigger, who I usually say all kinds of lovey schmucky stuff to while he looks at me like "shut up and feed me, damn human!"

          "____ as shit" used as a descriptor, as in "We were busy as shit at work tonight!"

          "Fucking hell" used as you'd use "damn it!" or something in a sentence, to show frustration, etc. "Fucking hell, that hurt!" or "Fucking hell, my computer is being stubborn!"

          I'll think of more, I'm sure. This was a great idea for a thread!
          "And though she be but little, she is FIERCE!"--Shakespeare

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          • #20
            Quoth Food Lady View Post
            I forgot the one I use most often: holy moly! I don't even know where I got it from, and people around me have begun to pick it up.
            Holy Moly - Quicksilver Messenger Service (Shady Grove) 1969. There's a song for everything!
            I am not an a**hole. I am a hemorrhoid. I irritate a**holes!
            Procrastination: Forward planning to insure there is something to do tomorrow.
            Derails threads faster than a pocket nuke.

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            • #21
              Hm.
              Shitballs - frustrated cursing
              GDMF - acronym only
              GDMFSOB - acronym only
              fuckles - slightly cheerier fuck "well, fuckles"
              brain fart -a derp
              bonehead - idiot
              bug off
              bastage
              bugger
              shite
              sod
              git
              cnut
              twat (too many British friends here)
              schmuck
              Have a Nice Day
              Crapazoid
              My little boogerhead
              Fuzzybutt Plopcat (may she rest in peace)
              Misha Kittygrrl
              the shits (3 young girls who are rowdy and need some structure) so, how are the shits doing?
              In my heart, in my soul, I'm a woman for rock & roll.
              She's as fast as slugs on barbituates.

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              • #22
                Being from the West, I call just about everybody "dude" or "darlin'." This is an especially helpful habit since I am notoriously bad at remembering people's names.

                For some reason, I often call women "love," though that is clearly not something I picked up out West. And no, I didn't pick it up from my British ex-fiance either. Nor did I pick up my common usage of "bloody" the way the Brits use it from her, either. Though I do use it a lot. Including a disproportionate amount of "bloody hell!" exclamations.

                "Kick ass!" as an exclamation to denote awesomeness, or "kick ass" as an adjective to more directly indicate from whence the awesomeness came, such as "Tombstone was a kick ass movie!"

                Despite my grammar nazi tendencies, I am notorious for saying, and typing, "I figgered" instead of "I figured." Along with various other permutations of the same word.

                "Deeeeeeelicious!" Only ever used to describe a fantastic beer. No matter how yummy food is, beer is the only thing that ever gets the above description.

                "Dumb phone." Used to describe my phone, which is not a smart phone. Therefore, dumb phone.

                "I'm getting too old for this." Almost exclusively said at work.

                "Try not. Do. Or do not. There is no try." I quote Yoda incessantly. Basically whenever anyone says "I'll try."

                "Craptastic" and "craptastical." Self-explanatory.

                "I have a hangover the size of Utah." Self-explanatory. And a frequently used phrase in my lexicon. There have been variations on it, including the most recent one, where I boasted as having a bladder the size of Utah. Considering I sat and watched football in a bar and drank beer for FIVE AND A HALF HOURS before I got up to go pee, I don't think I was overly exaggerating.

                "Tasty" and "tastycakes." Used to describe attractive women I see. I.e., "Megan Fox is tasty, dude."

                "Duh...WINNING!" Though that seems to be dying down somewhat lately.

                "Boy, you just ain't right" or "there's something wrong with you boy!" said to just about any and all of my male friends. Because, well, it's true. Except Golf Boy. Something is wrong with him, because nothing seems to be wrong with him.

                "What.....the.....FUCK?!?" Self-explanatory.

                "Chowdah" instead of chowder, in the manner of a Boston accent, despite the fact that I do not and have never lived in Boston. Used for any and all chowders, no matter what their geographical origins.

                "Douche" and "douchebag." Sadly, used a lot. Not that it's sad that I use it a lot. Rather, sad that there are so many people out there that fit the label so damn well that I have to use it so often.

                "Liquid silk." Used to describe Johnnie Walker Blue Label scotch whenever it is discussed.

                "Liquid candy." Used to describe a couple rums, specifically Brinley Gold Vanilla and Zaya Private Reserve.

                "Descended from the heavens," "a gift from the gods," and "proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." Used to describe truly awesome beers, rums, and wines.

                "Crack on a plate." Used to describe one of the best and most addictive appetizers at my bar. This is a recent one. Seems to work, because pretty much every time I use this phrase to describe the app in question to customers, they purchase it. And agree with it.

                "Video crack." Video games. Especially the MegaTouch machines. Pretty much self-explanatory. Been using this one for years, as a video crackhead myself.

                "Missed it by THAT much." Used often, this Get Smart reference goes over people's heads more often than I care to believe. Used whether I am really close or miss something by a country mile.

                "Missed it by a country mile." Self-explanatory.

                "I will smack the silly right off your face." Self-explanatory, used mostly with coworkers.

                "The Customer Is Always Right...But The Bartender Decides Who Is
                Still A Customer."

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                • #23
                  Add another "W00t"-er to the list.
                  Doglicker.
                  Monkeyf**ker.
                  Woodbillies (Hillbillies, but they live in the woods here, not up in the hills...)
                  Jamoke
                  Jagoff (The 'G' is essential here. May be Philly or Pennsylvanian in general in origin, as I inherited it from my step-father.)
                  Recently added a couple of 'throwback' items to the insult lexicon: doodoo head and boogerhead.

                  Seriously? (Monumental incredulity.)
                  One of my fav's borrowed from our friends across the sea: gobsmacked

                  fab
                  epic
                  peerless

                  referencing pairs of things, people, animals, whatever: frick, frack or heckle, jeckle.

                  trios: winkin, blinkin, nod. larry, moe, curly.

                  we (wife and I) only have one common quartet in our lives (the horses) but for some reason they only get referenced in pairs: the 'Bigs', the 'Brownies' the 'B*tches' and the 'Girls' (which are a different pair from the 'B*tches )

                  Thanks for the thread Gazebo, I'm gonna use plenty of these!
                  Last edited by sms001; 01-28-2012, 03:13 PM. Reason: "Quartet" rather than "foursome" invites less gutter thoughts. :)

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                  • #24
                    Quoth sms001 View Post
                    Jagoff (The 'G' is essential here. May be Philly or Pennsylvanian in general in origin, as I inherited it from my step-father.)
                    I don't think I've ever heard "Jagoff" in the Philadelphia region. But, it does show up regularly in the Pittsburgh area...quite frequently in fact. No doubt helped by the local media--WDVE loves that word

                    As for mine...

                    "Are you on crack?"
                    "Crack does NOT smoke itself"
                    "Are you fucking kidding me?"
                    "I'm not allowed to use a sledgehammer at work..."
                    "That's what she said"
                    "Do not want"
                    Aerodynamics are for people who can't build engines. --Enzo Ferrari

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                    • #25
                      'Metric Shit Load'
                      'Awww.. Crap!'
                      'ummm..oops'
                      'Monkey Fucking a Football'
                      'Wait, what?!'
                      'Doh!'
                      'Searously?'
                      'awesomemating'
                      'well..that's not good'
                      'Dude, put the crack pipe down, and slowly back away'
                      'One stiff drink away from becoming a national news headline'
                      'they are a strong argument for birth control'
                      'nothing but the cheapest money can buy'
                      Just sliding down the razor blade of life.

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                      • #26
                        Umm. Hmm. I say a lot of weird things. Let's see...

                        I also say "fuck me sideways." Other variations: "fuck me raw, fuck me running."

                        I say awesomesauce! But I append -sauce to everything. Epicsauce, for instance.

                        "I will platonically grope/hump you so hard."

                        Whorebagel/slutpancake/tartwaffle/ho(r)crumpet.

                        "The power of Christ compels you!"

                        I occasionally call people love, darling, or lovely. As in, "Hallo, lovely!"

                        "I am disturbed."

                        "I will set a puma on you."

                        "ALL YOUR CATS ARE BELONG TO ME."

                        "I will high-five you...in the face...with a tractor."

                        "ARE TOO!.....D2." (That one is my nerdy friend's fault.)

                        "Dude, what the fuck?!"

                        "Douchewaffle, douchecannoe, twatwaffle, cuntbag..." yeah, I come up with a lot of very inventive swear words, to the point one of my friends cheers when I say a new one.

                        "Sweet as!"

                        "Wicked pissa!" Totally NOT from the right area, but I absolutely adore it.

                        "Don't be so bloody naff." David Tennant's fault.

                        I call stupid people bints... XD

                        I dunno, just random things...I'm very weird.
                        "And so all the night-tide, I lie down by the side of my darling, my darling, my life and my bride!"
                        "Hallo elskan min/Trui ekki hvad timinn lidur"
                        Amayis is my wifey

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                        • #27
                          Quoth blas View Post

                          Hot dish = casserole. Apparently, Wisconsin is the only place where people say HOT DISH.
                          Actually, I understand that to be more of a Minnesota thing, and you are closer to Minnesota than I am.

                          I am on the opposite side of the state, and I have never heard anybody use that term to describe casserole.

                          A couple more:

                          "We needed (insert some item we already have too much of at the swamp) like I need a second asshole."

                          "May a squadron of beautiful vaginas find its way to your crotch by day's end." Permanently borrowed from The Oatmeal, and used to thank various male co-workers and friends for doing me favors.
                          Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.

                          "I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost daily

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                          • #28
                            My Dad's family is from London, specifically the East End - therefors I use an amount of Cockney rhyming slang:

                            Be right there just got to brush my barnet (Barnet = Barnet fair = hair)
                            Anyone seen my kettle? (Kettle & hob = fob or fob watch)
                            I use the word bollocks quite a lot.
                            My default expression of frustration is usually a short sharp "GAH!"
                            Win - something awesome.
                            An annoying person is a wankbiscuit.
                            I use lolcat speech far too much as well.
                            And depsite my best efforts, several years of living and working in Essex have resulted in me using "innit" far more than I would like.
                            "I fell out of favour with heaven somewhere and I'm here for the hell of it now"

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                            • #29
                              "Dumb as a bag of hammers" - self explanitory

                              "Hello, my name is auntiem I don't belive we've met..." - usually said to my SO when he suggests I do/think something out of character.

                              "Monkey balls!" I don't even know where I picked that up, but that is what popped out of my mouth the other day when I jammed my knee into the desk.

                              "Sucks to be you" - usually said to close friends when they are whinging on about something they don't need to like winning only $100 at the casino.

                              "maliciously unhelpful" - usually in reference to a particular company's "help" desk

                              This one has sound effects so I'll try: "I'm not screech screech crazy (doing a stabbing motion), I'm whoo whoo crazy (twirling by finger by my ear).

                              Other than that, I mostly quote movies often to people that have no idea the context or proper response. For example:

                              "There are flames on my car!" to which the proper response is "Serpantine!" (this one only really works with my Dad, but it shortcuts about 20 min of conversation and we both know exactly what it means).

                              "Before I drank I could not do this" (followed by some goofball dance move or preceeded by a spectaularly clumsy move) the proper response is "why would you want to do that?"

                              "...but this one goes to 11!"

                              "Waffles just pancakes with little square on 'em" - sorry, it must be said everytime anyone at the table orders waffles, which may explain why my SO never takes me to IHOP. Actually, if not stopped, I will sing the whole song truth be told.

                              "Let's get into trouble baby" (said in a smooth deep voice) but currently I've been substituting "Time to nut up or shut up".

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                              • #30
                                Most of these are specific to my boyfriend and I, although our circle of friends are privy to them as well.

                                Applesauce! (when super happy)
                                Apples! (same use as applesauce)
                                Taco salad (when unhappy)
                                Sadface ("I'm sorry to hear that")
                                Nom nom nom? (actually not to indicate dinner, usually say it to catch someone's attention...)
                                Derp derp! (can be "you're a derp", "it was super derpy", or out of context to grab someone's attention)

                                We also routinely talk like lolcats. Instead of having to go to the bathroom, we has to go potty.

                                My boyfriend and I joke that when he proposes, "applesauce!" will be a yes and "taco salad" would be a no

                                "When your deepest thoughts are broken, keep on dreaming, boy; when you stop dreaming it's time to die" -- Blind Melon

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