Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Month from Hell (long; kinda NSFW is spots)

Collapse
This topic is closed.
X
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Month from Hell (long; kinda NSFW is spots)

    Hello all. I know I haven't been on for quite some time, and I think an explanation is in order.

    Some of you may remember a post I made about my Aunt and her grandson. My aunt had two daughters, my cousins. My aunt was a horrible mother who neglected and physically harmed both her children. She had many health problems and forced them to care for her. As a result, the older daughter grew up to become a hardcore drug addict who slept with both men and women. She got pregnant at a young age and died when her son was 4 of a drug overdose. The younger daughter became depressed and began cutting herself. She got lower and lower until she attempted suicide. The doctors brought her back several times before she succeeded. They died at ages 22 and 15.

    After that, my cousins son (who I will call Joe) lived with my aunt and was treated just as poorly as my cousins were. He became a very messed up little boy who burned things with lighters, hurt his dog, broke into houses to steal things, showed his private parts to other kids in school, lied and manipulated anyone and everyone, and even hurt himself and other kids.
    After the younger daughter started trying to kill herself, multiple family members began calling Child Protective Services. We continued calling after her death to try to get Joe into a proper home where he can get love and attention. (My aunt was also a severe hoarder and a slob who left needles tainted with Hep C littered around the house. No place for a child to be running around). CPS visited there multiple times and did nothing. Joe became quiet and withdrawn. He wrote, "I want to die," on the wall. We called more. Still nothing was done.

    Things remained the same up until the begining of this month, when I dropped off the face of the Internet. My aunt died. We still don't know how or why. She died in her sleep late at night and Joe discovered her when he woke up for school. He wasn't scared, nor did he cry. He called 9-1-1 to repore his grandma's death, then turned on the GameCube and played video games in front of her corpse until the cops arrived.
    Family came from out of state for the funeral because her body had already begun to decompose. It took 10 people and 3 full days to clean out the trailor. It was so bad, the whole thing will be junked. 2/3 of her food was expired. Like, expired in 2008 expired. There were needles everywhere. We discovered that Joe was urinating in his room and on his own bed. We also found human feces on the floor of the bathroom. The floor was rotting out, there was black mold on the walls, garbage was everywhere, and everything was coated with a thick layer of nicotine and dust. And that wasn't even the half of it. The cops came to collect her medications. They took over 100 bottles of pills, and we found 30 more after they left. All of them were different medications.
    The day of the funeral, we had a meeting with CPS to determine temporary custody of Joe. At the meeting, my mom asked why nothing was done all those times we called. The case worker said we should have tried harder. In the end, temporary custody was awarded to my grandma. We thought Joe had some issues, but that therapy and love would help.
    That week, we spent a lot of time around family and around Joe who is now 10. We haven't seen him very much, and when we did, he was silent. That week, we began seeing what went on in his mind. It scared the hell out of us.
    He asked odd questions like how different animals have sex. He showed a strange facination with death. For example, he said he touched my aunt's dead body and it felt awesome. He would whisper to himself, saying things like, "shhh don't let them hear you; shhhh shhhh I don't trust them either". He honestly thought he was a vampire. He bought fangs for Halloween which he wore 24/7, tried to bite the dog, said he wondered what dog blood tasted like, and wrote in a secret journal that his favorite food is B positive.
    At the funeral, he asked if the vents are to keep out the smell of the dead bodies. When he walked up to the casket, he began smelling her body, touching, and scratching it, saying he liked the smell of her rotting flesh.
    My grandma gave my sister and I Joe's laptop to wipe because she doesn't have Internet and, therefore, he has no use for it. Before we wiped it, my sister wanted to delete his YouTube and Facebook accounts. What we found was scary. He posted videos on YouTube with his full name and cell phone number, asking people to call him. On Facebook, he was messaging random people and giving out his phone number. While cleaning out his YouTube videos, we found gay child porn that he was looking at. On Facebook, he was messaging women asking them to roleplay with him and he told one woman that he wanted to touch her boobs. He was using unbelievably foul language and even agreed to meet one man offline in chat. We discovered that one of his friends was his vampire alter-ego. He had two Facebooks and he was talking to himself back and forth.
    After all this came to light, I told my sister to check his web history. What we found there made me feel sick to my stomach. There was some normal 10 year old boy stuff like games and cartoons, scattered between pages and pages of porn. Child porn, bestiality porn, gay porn, gay bestiality porn, XXX porn, porn videos, porn webcams, porn, porn, porn. He was also visiting gay dating websites and looking at profiles. Some Google searches were there too. "How to get your dog to have sex with you," "picture of dog penis," "how to get your dog to hump you," "how to make your Sim naked".
    After all this came to light, my grandma admitted that this was too much for her and CPS came to take Joe.

    My father has a drinking problem and a mental disorder(ODD, bipolar, depression, or something along those lines). When my sister was young, he got really drunk. Threw her on the bed and bit her neck. A few months later, he came up behind me and started kissing my neck with his arms around my waist. When I pulled away, he said he thought I was my mother. I was 11, 5 feet tall, and with brown hair down to my waist. My mom has short black hair and was taller than me. At the time, my mom told him he needed to quit drinking and get help or else. He agreed and quit drinking, supposedly. A few years later, her got a DUI for driving drunk on school property. He hit another car and wound up in jail for a few days, with a teather for a few months, and with alcohol testing for a year. The fines totaled to just under $10,000. He swore he would quit drinking and get help. He staretd going to councelling for his drinking and because he gets severe mood swings that made us all feel scared and like dirt. He went for a while and quit. After my aunt(my mom's sister) passed, his moods got worse because we weren't all paying attention to him. My sister had enough and wrote a long letter that ended with her saying "either he leaves, or I do; I just can't live with him anymore." She also brought up the incident from 8 years ago, saying he also touched her under her shirt and put his tongue in her mouth, but she was too scared to say it at the time becuse it made her feel dirty. I also wrote a letter about his drinking and his moods. Then, my mom wrote a letter about times he cheated on her and about how he told her she was fat and disgusting when she was pregnant with my brother. All 3 were read to him at councelling. My mom kicked him out that day.
    During the first week withought him, the house stayed spotless, everything was light, positive and happy, my brother began to talk more, sleep and eat better. When me, my mom, and my sister talked about our letters, we discovered that the two incidents happened while my mom was pregnant and he wasn't looking at her or giving her affection. We also discovered that he was working with my uncle at the time who was a drug addict. He admitted to taking drugs with him before he did those things to my sister and I. He is now refusing to continue to get help and is being very mean and hateful towards my mother, sister, and me. Just last week, she decided to divorce him.

    Today, we got news that Joe is now with a foster mom who is interested in adopting him. She is taking him to therapy and has him enrolled in Tai-Kwon-Do and basketball and he seems very happy there.

    At my house, we are boxing up my dad's stuff and living happy, relaxed lives. My brother is really coming out of his shell and his personality is showing. He has become very polite and helpful by mimicing us instead of being rude and mouthy by mimicing dad.

    This month started by turning our lives upsidedown and insideout, but it seems that everything is falling in to place. I went through the rabbit hole and came out the other end in a better place.
    Answers: $1
    Correct Answers: $2
    Answers that require thought: $5
    Dumb looks are still free.

  • #2
    I'm glad everything seems to be working out for the better, and I hope Joe makes a good recovery from the damage of his early childhood. I'm also really glad that your brother is improving as well!

    Though I have to say, "You should've tried harder"? When you were calling and calling and three visits didn't see anything wrong? Yeah, right

    But that's in the past. I hope that everything continues to get better!
    My Writing Blog -Updated 05/06/2013
    It's so I can get ideas out of my head, I decided to put it in a blog in case people are bored or are curious as to the (many) things in progress.

    Comment


    • #3
      I missed you and I'm glad you're back and something is finally being done for Joe. I am gobsmacked that CPS wouldn't do anything. Wow.
      "Is it hot in here to you? It's very warm, isn't it?"--Nero, probably

      Comment


      • #4
        Quoth Food Lady View Post
        I missed you and I'm glad you're back and something is finally being done for Joe. I am gobsmacked that CPS wouldn't do anything. Wow.
        I'm not. They are so overloaded with cases, their main goal in life is to keep the kid with family and pretend everything is OK even when it isn't.

        Glad things are getting better for the OP; wow, what a story. I'm surprised Joe has turned around so quick; that kid has real damage, and foster mom should continue taking him to counseling indefinitely, no matter how well he seems to be doing.
        They say that God only gives us what we can handle. Apparently, God thinks I'm a bad ass.

        Comment


        • #5
          *snuggle hugs* you have my number if you ever need to talk or txt.

          Comment


          • #6
            Awwwee thank everyone! Just a quick update: we (mother sister and I) cleaned the whole house today and put all his stuff in the back room. It feels good to have a home.
            Answers: $1
            Correct Answers: $2
            Answers that require thought: $5
            Dumb looks are still free.

            Comment


            • #7
              Quoth Panacea View Post
              I'm not. They are so overloaded with cases, their main goal in life is to keep the kid with family and pretend everything is OK even when it isn't.
              And they don't end up hiring enough people to deal with the crapload...it's a similar story down here. In fact, there's been reports that the Mandatory Notification line is often clogged up and teachers have been known to wait up to 30 minutes, only for them to do nothing in some cases. (I will get a chance to practice my skills in 2-3 weeks)
              The best professors are mad scientists! -Zoom

              Now queen of USSR-Land...

              Comment


              • #8
                The Caring Services (including child protection, elderly protection and disabled protection) tend to be chronically short-budgetted and short-staffed.

                Staff burnout is likely, if not inevitable, in these fields anyway; being given too many cases and too few resources just makes it happen faster.

                Aaaaannnndddd.... I'm starting to fratch. Ahem.


                Anyway: I'm glad things are finally working out for Joe. Stay in touch with the foster family; it'll be healthy for Joe to find out/know that the healthier members of his natural family actually give a damn about him.
                If you can make a point of including him in Thanksgivings and Christmasses and Birthdays and other family celebrations (even if he comes with one of his foster parents who can act as a carer), that'll probably help him a lot.

                Your family and the foster family may need to conspire to have the carer take him home as soon as he starts to fret, or remove him from conversations that tend towards subjects that distress him (or conversations he leads towards unhealthy subjects), and so on. I don't know - let yourself be guided by the foster parents and the counsellor.

                But good luck to you ALL - and OMG what a month!
                Seshat's self-help guide:
                1. Would you rather be right, or get the result you want?
                2. If you're consistently getting results you don't want, change what you do.
                3. Deal with the situation you have now, however it occurred.
                4. Accept the consequences of your decisions.

                "All I want is a pretty girl, a decent meal, and the right to shoot lightning at fools." - Anders, Dragon Age.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Quoth Seshat View Post
                  Anyway: I'm glad things are finally working out for Joe. Stay in touch with the foster family; it'll be healthy for Joe to find out/know that the healthier members of his natural family actually give a damn about him.
                  If you can make a point of including him in Thanksgivings and Christmasses and Birthdays and other family celebrations (even if he comes with one of his foster parents who can act as a carer), that'll probably help him a lot.
                  This is a very good idea; it lets the foster parents know that you do still care about him and want to include both him and them in your lives, as well. This kid has been through all sorts of hell, but it looks like he's getting the help he needs and deserves.

                  Kisa, you and your family have really been through the wringer. Now that everything is tidied away, do take time to take care of yourselves, as well.
                  I don't have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem.
                  My LiveJournal
                  A page we can all agree with!

                  Comment


                  • #10

                    Wow that is some heavy stuff! Glad to see you're doing well and making the best of it. I was really glad to hear that there is a person interested in helping little Joe and helping him through the things he had to endure with your aunt.

                    Kudos to your mom! I'm glad you and your sister can finally have home actually feel like home.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      I'm sorry your life went boom, but I'm glad things are looking up.

                      Comment

                      Working...
                      X