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  • War is Heck.

    Client placed a rush order yesterday to work on a outdoor simulated combat sport website. I'm excited, as I've done stuff for this type of website before, and my work was such a huge hit, that I actually designed DVD covers and more for them.

    They make sure to specify that I need to remember to include "an updated logo, lots of splatters, laser sights, tactical stuff, and sexy girls".

    The result came out pretty darn good for a mock, very grungey, yet not overly busy design, and some pretty awesomely posed "combat girls" juxtaposed with actioney-posed guys.

    Showed it to a few friends, who were like "OMG THIS IS AWESOME". I'm thinking, yay, this will be a quickly over project!

    Goshdarnit WHY DO I THINK THIS WAY. I should know better by now!

    Client's reply?

    We think this is too gritty. Too busy. Get rid of the girls, we don't want people thinking they'll actually find them out there. Make it brighter, happier. Smiling people in the facemasks! Brighter colors, send us a cheery one, we want people to realize how much FUN they'll be having! Get rid of the splatters too, you can send us a darker mockup if you insist, but we really would prefer a more happy version.

    .....

    You run....a SIMULATED COMBAT sport company!!....

    How is ANYTHING about that supposed to evoke roses and happiness? D: Not to even mention the fact that the facemasks cover anything remotely resembling a smile.

    But they're not done yet.

    Please also get rid of that logo, we want you to use our current one. Just blow it up to about four times its current size on the site. Sorry, we do not have the original files for it any more, we don't even remember who designed it for us. Just use your photoshop or whatever to make it bigger. Thanks.

    Their current "logo" is a tiny image that makes thumbnails look like posters in comparison. Its super, SUPER tiny. I explain to the client that it's going to be a massive project to try and rebuild their logo, let alone the fact that I can't get it looking perfect from such a tiny source.

    Just do whatever, I know you can do stuff like that in Photoshop. Thanks in advance!

    ....

    War.

    War is heck.

    ....and so are my clients, on more than one occasion.
    By popular request....I am now officially the Enemy of Normalcy.

    "What is unobtainium? To Seraph, it's a normal client. :P" -- Observant Friend

  • #2
    War.

    War never changes.
    PWNADE(TM) - Serve up a glass today! | PWNZER - An act of pwnage so awesome, it's like the victim got hit by a tank.

    There are only Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse because I choose to walk!

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    • #3
      I wonder what they'll want tomorrow if they changed their mind so drastically already O_O.

      Comment


      • #4
        My best guess would be fuzzy, loveable characters for the younger audience.
        By popular request....I am now officially the Enemy of Normalcy.

        "What is unobtainium? To Seraph, it's a normal client. :P" -- Observant Friend

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        • #5
          Quoth Seraph View Post
          My best guess would be fuzzy, loveable characters for the younger audience.
          zOmg they'll turn out to be bronies, just watch.
          PWNADE(TM) - Serve up a glass today! | PWNZER - An act of pwnage so awesome, it's like the victim got hit by a tank.

          There are only Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse because I choose to walk!

          Comment


          • #6
            Quoth Jay 2K Winger View Post
            War.

            War never changes.
            Came for this quote.

            Now my day is complete.

            Comment


            • #7
              Quoth Seraph View Post
              Just do whatever, I know you can do stuff like that in Photoshop. Thanks in advance!
              .
              The magic of Photoshop. So many people think it can do anything and everything, and all with the push of a button or two: need that tiny thumbnail turned into a giant poster, no problem - need every colour in that 85 colour drawing changed to something different, no problem - person in the photo facing the other way, you want to see their face, no problem

              As for the rest, I know I would be quoting their original email, pointing out exactly how I have given them what they originally asked for, then give them the quote for the "revisions" they are now requesting.

              I had a client back when I was a programmer, we were doing a custom ledger system for their company (which was technically split into several companies, all having different requirements). They wanted a computerized system exactly as they'd been doing things by hand for decades. I would get the info from their bookkeeper on how a particular segment should look, react, process, etc. then go back and code it, test it and implement it. I don't know how many times I was done or near to it when she would call me up and say "btw, you realize it only works that way usually, but if this or that is true (or it rains on a Thursday) then it's something else entirely". My desk had a permanent expression of my head, I know. And they never could understand why we didn't always meet deadlines or original estimates.

              Madness takes it's toll....
              Please have exact change ready.

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              • #8
                What's that coming out of the guy lying on the ground? It's...strawberry jam!
                Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.

                "I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost daily

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                • #9
                  Might I suggest using Care Bears as the models

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Quoth Jay 2K Winger View Post
                    zOmg they'll turn out to be bronies, just watch.
                    My Little Paintball? Cool. Don't even need to change the initials.


                    Seraph, do you ever get any sane clients?
                    "If your day is filled with firefighting, you need to start taking the matches away from the toddlers…” - HM

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                    • #11
                      Quoth Crossbow View Post
                      Seraph, do you ever get any sane clients?
                      On occasions! And I cling to them like nothing else.
                      By popular request....I am now officially the Enemy of Normalcy.

                      "What is unobtainium? To Seraph, it's a normal client. :P" -- Observant Friend

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Quoth Crossbow View Post
                        Seraph, do you ever get any sane clients?
                        I asked her to do some work for me.

                        Never mind.
                        Life is too short to not eat popcorn.
                        Save the Ales!
                        Toys for Tots at Rooster's Cafe

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Quoth csquared View Post
                          I asked her to do some work for me.

                          Never mind.
                          Just differently but tolerably crazy, it seems.
                          I am not an a**hole. I am a hemorrhoid. I irritate a**holes!
                          Procrastination: Forward planning to insure there is something to do tomorrow.
                          Derails threads faster than a pocket nuke.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Quoth Seraph View Post
                            You run....a SIMULATED COMBAT sport company!!....

                            How is ANYTHING about that supposed to evoke roses and happiness?
                            Actually, paintball/airsoft/nerf combat is just stupidly fun with the right group. At its best, you're a little kid again. The playground's just bigger, and the toys work (mostly).

                            Still, pretty silly of them to ask for a bunch of stuff then decide that's exactly what they didn't want. It almost sounds like you were talking to two different people at the company.
                            The Rich keep getting richer because they keep doing what it was that made them rich. Ditto the Poor.
                            "Hy kan tell dey is schmot qvestions, dey is makink my head hurt."
                            Hoc spatio locantur.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Quoth Geek King View Post
                              Still, pretty silly of them to ask for a bunch of stuff then decide that's exactly what they didn't want. It almost sounds like you were talking to two different people at the company.
                              She might have been. It would've made more sense for the company to get everyone together, figure out exactly what they need, then contact Seraph! But of course, if it makes sense...
                              I don't have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem.
                              My LiveJournal
                              A page we can all agree with!

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