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  • #1

    Not. Listening.

    Not a blessed person is actually listening to me today. First 3 calls:

    Situation: Machine is perfectly crapped out with an unfixable error code. Tech must be dispatched. Dispatching tech.
    C1: This is in the Enlightenment Building.
    Me: Yes, ma'am, I have it listed here.
    C1: No, you don't.
    Me: Oh? Let me verify the address with you. It's [blah]-
    C1: No, you people never have the address, it's never right. Your tech is an idiot and he never knows where he is going.
    Me: Is the address [blah]?
    C1: Yes.
    Me: All right, ma'am, I have the address on the ticket.
    C1: *sarcastically* I bet you do. *click*

    Situation: Client wishes for machine to duplex when printing to it from computer.
    Me: Ok, to set the machine to duplex we'll need to set the printer properties on the compu-
    C2: No we don't! This has to be set on the copier!
    Me: Well, ma'am, if we set this on the copier, anything the printer driver sends will override it.
    C2: No it won't!
    Me: Ma'am, I can ass-
    C2: Don't argue with me!
    Me: All right, ma'am. *lead through client setting duplex permanently on copier; print test page from computer*
    C2: *whining* It didn't duplex!
    Me: Yes, ma'am, that is because we didn't set it in the printer driver.
    C2: I told you, we don't need to set it there! *hang up*

    Situation: Sales rep for our company is trying to sell a copier to a client. Called up asking for support.
    C3: The client wants a button on the touchscreen that they can press to separate duplex to single-sided copies.
    Me: Ok, that can be done under the Duplex&Stuff tab, but it's not a button that can be set on the machine.
    C3: The client wants it, though! We can't make the sale without it. Help me make it happen.
    Me: Ma'am, it's just simply not possible with the machine. There's no way to make a new button on the touchscreen. That would require rewriting the whole firmware for the machine.
    C3: There must be a way!
    Me: *spends 10 minutes showing where, in the internal documentation we both have access to, it says NO, NOT POSSIBLE*
    C3: I don't care! Dispatch a REAL TECH to do a firmware upgrade! I'm sure that'll do it.
    Me: Ok. Dispatching a tech. *sets it to bill the Sales rep for the call when there is nothing found to be done, watches with glee as sales commission disappears in fees*

    -BIC-
    Tags: None
  • #2
    Do they ever listen?

    I have so many stories of customers not listening.
    - At the call center when I explain that I'm an after-hours rep for some company and that I can only take messages for call-backs, the customer still insists that I give them account information or accept their payment for something.
    - At the electronics store I work now when I repeat over and over again that I do not sell Dell computers
    - Also at the electronics store when I try to explain that I cannot provide support for computers or computer related products, whether I sold it or not, because I am not authorized or permitted to do so. It's company policy. I could lose my job.
    - When I tell someone that Windows is just an operating system and does not equal Office or Word or Excel or any application.
    - At the pizza place when getting a customer's address. I'd get the address, then they'd go through ten minutes of turn-by-turn directions based on landmarks like "the Johnson's house" and "the big blue rock" and "the barn that burned down five years ago" even after I told them that our drivers know the area and have delivered to that street (sometimes even their neighbors that same night) many times before.
    - At any job when I've tried to tell people we're closed. Or that we're sold out of something.

    I have had deaf customers who understand me better than my hearing customers.
    I suspect that... inside every adult (sometimes not very far inside) is a bratty kid who wants everything his own way.
    - Bill Watterson
    My co-workers: They're there when they need me.
    - IPF

    Comment

    • #3
      Quoth HawaiianShirts View Post
      I have had deaf customers who understand me better than my hearing customers.
      OMFG... soda+funny joke=pained nasal passages...
      I know I'm laughing but it's really not funny. - Me
      "I was in the hall. I know, because I was there." - Clue

      Comment

      • #4
        I don't get it. If they think they know so much more than you do, why are they calling you in the first place?
        Sometimes life is altered.
        Break from the ropes your hands are tied.
        Uneasy with confrontation.
        Won't turn out right. Can't turn out right

        Comment

        • #5
          MadMike: I wish I knew. I really do . I've had that problem as a TS agent with EVERY company I ever worked for. I think the worse was Kodak Dental Systems/PracticeWorks; I had dentists with NO computer knowledge whatsoever screaming because OF COURSE the newest software should work with NT 4.0/Windows 95/Novell. And it didn't. But no...don't listen to the tech....

          I'll have to dig up those stories.

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          • #6
            Kodak + Win95 and NT..

            I'll take "OS's that don't support USB for 10"


            [pedant]
            Yes the later version of '95 supported USB, but only if you sacrificed a chicken whilst dancing skyclad around Stonehenge on the spring equinox...[/pedant]
            Lady, people aren't chocolates. D'you know what they are mostly? Bastards. Bastard-coated bastards with bastard filling. Dr Cox - Scrubs

            Comment

            • #7
              Quoth Naaman View Post
              [pedant]
              Yes the later version of '95 supported USB, but only if you sacrificed a chicken whilst dancing skyclad around Stonehenge on the spring equinox...[/pedant]
              Which is surprisingly freeing after you've done it a few times.
              The Rich keep getting richer because they keep doing what it was that made them rich. Ditto the Poor.
              "Hy kan tell dey is schmot qvestions, dey is makink my head hurt."
              Hoc spatio locantur.

              Comment

              • #8
                [pedant]
                Yes the later version of '95 supported USB, but only if you sacrificed a chicken whilst dancing skyclad around Stonehenge on the spring equinox...[/pedant]

                Isn't that what needs to be done to make Windows ME (mistake edition) work at all?
                "Good evening, ignorant pigs. Put down your crack pipes and your beer bongs and pay attention." ~ Head of Richard Nixon

                Comment

                • #9
                  Quoth VoodooSquirrel View Post
                  Isn't that what needs to be done to make Windows ME (mistake edition) work at all?
                  Actually, to get that one to work, you have to make an additional sacrifice to Bill Gates...as well as cut down a tree with a herring!
                  Aerodynamics are for people who can't build engines. --Enzo Ferrari

                  Comment

                  • #10
                    NI!! Ni!
                    "I reject your reality and substitute my own"....Adam Savage-Mythbuster

                    Must remember to stop using "brain of death" on slower morons.... I meant customers.

                    Comment

                    • #11
                      Nothing like bringing all of my software on a thumbdrive, then seeing the glorious 256-color Windows 95 boot screen.
                      I've been here for two years, work harder than most others, and I'm getting paid $1.80 an hour
                      less than the 17 year old slacker you hired two months ago. Maybe that's why I'm not chipper at work.

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                      • #12
                        You're forgetting patting your head and rubbing your belly. And everyone always forgets to sing "I'm a little teapot!"
                        SC: “Yeah, Bob’s Company. I'm Bob. It's my company.” - GK
                        SuperHotelWorker made my Avi!!

                        Comment

                        • #13
                          And bring Mr. Rude a shrubbery.
                          I think, therefore I am. But I am micromanaged, therefore I am not.

                          Comment

                          • #14
                            Quoth VoodooSquirrel View Post
                            Isn't that what needs to be done to make Windows ME (mistake edition) work at all?
                            UGH don't remind me, when we got the old pc formatted for use for mom, despite us INSISTING they keep win98 in it, they installed ME instead. The reason?

                            "ME is newer".

                            Yeah so is Vista, you don't see me replacing my XP for that, do you?
                            Now would be a good time to visit So Very Unofficial!

                            "I've had so many nasty customers this week, my bottomless pit is now ankle-deep."-Me.

                            Comment

                            • #15
                              Quoth Shironu-Akaineko View Post
                              "ME is newer".
                              The crappiness of ME and Vista aside, at least she knows they're newer. My son told me the idiot techs at his school got a hold of a bunch of computers with Win98, wiped them all, and installed 3.11 on them. Because "311 (three hundred eleven) is newer than 98."

                              Not surprisingly, most of the teachers call my son for computer help, rather than their "wonderful" techs.
                              Sometimes life is altered.
                              Break from the ropes your hands are tied.
                              Uneasy with confrontation.
                              Won't turn out right. Can't turn out right

                              Comment

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