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Storytime!: Tell your shoplifting stories here

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  • #46
    I remember a pair of ballsy teen shoplifters from when I was working as a cashier at a mom-n-pop drug store in the 90s. They came in wearing baggy clothing but skinny as rails, and when they shuffled up to the check out lane to buy the one pack of 25 cent gum between them, these two were suddenly plump and lumpy around their middles.

    I called a manager for a "skewed SKU" check which was the drug store's "code" for theft and he made them turn out their pockets and lift their shirts. These kids had stuffed their waistbands with Mountain Dew, a gentleman's magazine (ahem), cheap knock-off cologne and gummy candy.

    The manager took them to the back room, sat them down, explained to them that being sugared up, horny and reeking of terrible cologne was no way to go through life. After a 45 minute lecture, he let them go, making them promise not to steal again. One of them even asked for a job, and when he turned 16 he was allowed to work as a stock boy.

    It really changed how I saw the position of 'manager'. I've never seen that kind of investment in people or heart from a corporate store, but then again, that drug store went out of business a few years later.

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    • #47
      My daughter, now in her late 30's, says she clearly remembers when she was 3 and she tried to shoplift a toy I wouldn't buy for her. I marched her back to the store, made her give it back, and apologize to the manager. So you catch them young enough it DOES stick!

      We also found out that when you have a baby in a backpack, that puts her at just the right height to grab a candy bar at the grocery store checkout. Do you know how badly a baby can mangle a 3 Musketeers bar?

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      • #48
        I worked at a pet store and people stole stuff all the time. Mostly to return them for store credit and then go run the gift card through the machines that buy gift cards from people. (Or, as one lady basically admitted, sell them to their dealers. That one was a little surreal.) That was actually a big reason that I quit. I got tired of having to act like I was an idiot and give these people all of this free money while getting yelled at for it at the same time.

        But the best story was when someone stole an anemone. It hadn't been adapting too well to the new tank so I checked on it before our regional animal manager came in for her 'walk'. She came in, did the walk, we sat in the office while she typed everything up, she left, and I went to check on the anemone. It was gone. I asked who sold it and got questioning looks back. Checked the computer, no sale. Checked the cameras. He was in his early 20's or so. He got approached by pretty much everyone to see if he needed help. He waited until both cashiers were busy and the aquatics guy was helping a customer in the aisle. The cameras weren't great, but you can see the tank open, close, and the guy leave with his hand in his pocket. I really hope he had a bag or something in there.

        The funny part was when he came back. One of the cashiers came up to me where I was stocking dog food all "He's back!" (She was rather livid.) Of course, we can't really do anything, but we all ended up watching him. Aquatics guy started asking him what kind of tank he has a home (salt), what kind of fish does he have (clown fish). "Yeah? Do you have an anemone for them to hide in?" I almost died. It was great. The guy kind of muttered that he did, so I guess the anemone lived, at least.
        He left shortly after that question so I went outside to "get carts" (which were another highly stolen item, btw) and the guy drove the long way around the parking lot, I guess thinking I was after his plate.
        He didn't come back.

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        • #49
          A mate of mine has a little girl who, when she was around three, went thru a klepto stage. She'd grab stuff, put it in her buggy then show her mum when she got out. The funniest time was once when I was with my mate and her daughter. We went into Boots cuz my mate needed some baby stuff and I wanted to buy some make up. We queued, paid, and went outside. That was when the little girl held up a bright purple packet of condoms and said, "Look, mummy!" Cue major embarrassment for my mate as she had to go inside and return the condoms. XD The staff were fine about it, but they did laugh their arses off.

          Quoth nutraxfornerves View Post
          At the museum where I volunteer, a docent overhead a couple of 10-year old schoolboys bragging about the stuff they'd stolen from the gift shop of the museum they'd visited earlier in the day.
          Ah, school trips. I remember the "fun" we had with them back when I worked at the shire horse farm. One incident stands out; it was when there was a French school trip at the farm. Basically, two teachers and about forty kids. I was sweeping up when a customer ran up to me and told me that he had been walking back to his car when he'd heard frantic quacking coming from a bus. He'd looked, and there was a duck in the bus; was it one of ours? A colleague of mine, let's call her Lara, and I went to investigate. Yes, it was one of ours; apparently, one of the French school kids had taken the duck off the pond and stuffed it in the bus for some reason. Lara and I went to get one of the teachers so that the bus could be unlocked and we could rescue the duck. We took it out and dropped it in a sack so as to not give it any more stress. The duck had caused one hell of a mess in the bus, shitting all over the seats and dropping feathers everywhere, so the teacher asked us to clean it up. We refused to and I said, "Since your kids stole the duck, they can damn well clean it up" and we left for the animal farm to put the duck back. We were expecting it to die, but surprisingly, it lived. And to this day, I hope that the kids had a lovely journey back to France in their duckshit and feather covered bus.
          Last edited by Lace Neil Singer; 04-18-2017, 12:15 PM.
          People who don't like cats were probably mice in an earlier life.
          My DeviantArt.

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          • #50
            Quoth Lace Neil Singer View Post
            We refused to and I said, "Since your kids stole the duck, they can damn well clean it up" and we left for the animal farm to put the duck back. We were expecting it to die, but surprisingly, it lived. And to this day, I hope that the kids had a lovely journey back to France in their duckshit and feather covered bus.
            Ah, I love the smell of karma in the morning.
            "It is traditional when asking for help or advice to listen to the answers you receive" - RealUnimportant

            Rev that Engine Louder, I Can't Hear How Small Your Dick Is - Jay 2K Winger

            The Darwin Awards The best site to visit to restore your faith in instant karma.

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            • #51
              I work in a charity shop and we get things stolen nearly every day. We go around and count the empty hangers, hangers stuffed inside other items and items without hangers (Yes they steal the coat hangers too)
              The shoplifter that stands out though happened when I was still a volunteer rather than a paid staff member. We get quite a few people with mental disabilities and their carers shopping in our store. Most of them are regular customers and cause no problems at all. One of these ladies wanted a dress, so her carer helped her chose some to try on and they went into the changing room together. Then the carer comes out and gets another dress, one that was about £20. I thought at the time that it would be small for the lady, but if she wanted to try it I wasn't going to argue.
              They brought a dress and went on their way. I went into the changing room to collect the dresses they didn't buy and surprise, surprise the £20 dress isn't there. The dress that would have fitted the carer. So she used the lady with a mental disability as a way to shop lift from a shop raising money to support elderly people in the local community.

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              • #52
                My old job would get SCs using kids and others with disabilities as a smokescreen to shoplift all the time...and we couldn't do anything about it unless a manager actually saw them. Even then nothing would happen as corporate was too scared of getting sued.

                Not too many instances where I am now except the cheese incident (someone 'bought' a half-wheel of very expensive cheese for $9; we suspect it was an inside job and the cheese manager had to be involved somehow) and apparently some guy walked into the in-store wine shop last week and walked out with a company laptop.
                "I am quite confident that I do exist."
                "Excuse me, I'm making perfect sense. You're just not keeping up." The Doctor

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                • #53
                  Quoth FreddyB View Post
                  I used to work for a large potato chip company, route sales, and one day I was in a small variety store. I heard some commotion <SNIP> The store manager and I just stared at each other in shock. This kid learned there was no real consequence from stealing.
                  Can you say Bizarro world copy of the dad in TheHobbit's story?
                  Last edited by Dave1982; 08-13-2017, 04:46 AM. Reason: Excessive quoting
                  Note to self: Hot glass looks like Cold glass.

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                  • #54
                    I've never seen it happen, but I am certain that someone, somewhere, has gone through a store with the infant carrier/car seat that are completely covered and stuffed it full of merchandise. Those covers are supposed to protect the child from the sun, so why use them after sunset? Employees would be unlikely to go up to a stranger ans ask to see the baby concealed in such a cover (don't want to wake the baby), so I sometimes wonder if there is actually a child in there at all.

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                    • #55
                      I see strollers covered with blankets when it's 90 degrees outside...the airconditioning in the store isn't that high. Only Security is allowed to question/detain anyone though.
                      "I am quite confident that I do exist."
                      "Excuse me, I'm making perfect sense. You're just not keeping up." The Doctor

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                      • #56
                        Stuff would "disappear" from Hechinger's all the time. Most of it was stupid stuff--half-dead plants that were stored outside, nuts and bolts from the hardware section, packets of seeds, etc. Every now and then though, you'd get a real winner...

                        ...such as the guy who stole one of the display drills. For all intents and purposes, they looked and felt like the real deal. But, while they weighed about the same, the motors were usually removed, and the bodies filled with lead fishing weights or scrap metal. The dummies were then chained and bolted to the counter. Totally useless, in other words. That didn't stop someone from going to the next aisle over, grabbing a pair of bolt cutters, and then "liberating" one of Black & Decker's finest power drills. Considering the amount of staff in the area plus the cameras, it took some balls to steal it.

                        The other time, was when one of the staff was caught stealing. Seems she had a serious drug problem, and things were constantly turning up missing. Expensive things like power tools were disappearing. At the time, she was working in the front end as one of the cashier supervisors, and had the keys to various "secured areas." One of those areas being the "cage" in the warehouse where the power tools were kept. The warehouse, which had no cameras in or near the cage. Because she knew everyone's schedules, she'd simply wait until she knew nobody would be back there, and then pass whatever she could find through one of the dock doors. She and her buddies eventually got caught.
                        Aerodynamics are for people who can't build engines. --Enzo Ferrari

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                        • #57
                          The supervisor of the cleaning crew slipped merchandise into his wheeled cart, and stowed it above a ceiling tile in the men's room until he could sneak it out.

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                          • #58
                            Quoth Foxbite View Post

                            The manager took them to the back room, sat them down, explained to them that being sugared up, horny and reeking of terrible cologne was no way to go through life.
                            Fantastic advice: I just wish some of my old co-workers and friends had picked up on this.
                            Be a winner today: Pick a fight with a 4 year old.

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