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I can understand why customers go mad.I have the name,extension and title of the person I want to speak to.That would be sufficient to find them you'd think...
Me:Me.Come on,that's obvious
HSBC:Highly Stupid Bank Clot
HSBC:Hello,switchboard,can I help you?
Me:I'd like to be transferred through to Sue A. please
HSBC:Huh?What do you mean?
Me:I'd like to be transferred through to Sue A. please
HSBC:I don't know what you're asking-what do you want me to do?
Me:I'd like to be transferred through to Sue A. please
HSBC:Is that a person,a place,a department?
Me:It's a person.Sue A.
HSBC:I need the full name.
Me:That is the full name-Sue A.
HSBC:I need the full first name.
Me:I don't know that-she just said Sue in the message.
HSBC:Without that,I can't help you.I need the full first name.
Me:I don't know whether she's Suzanne,Susie,Suzette or Sue.She goes by the name of Sue at work. She's the Premier Co-ordinator and she's on extension 1234
HSBC:How do you spell A.?
Me:I'm assuming A-*-*-*-*.Or possibly A-*-*-*-*
HSBC:If you haven't got the correct spelling,I can't help you.
Me:Well,let's try A-*-*-*-*.Do you have anyone called Sue A. of whatever spelling then can you transfer me through-I'm certain there can't be more than one of them.
HSBC:Well,I can't transfer you if I have don't know who you want to talk to.
Me:Right-there is a Sue A.,who is a person.
HSBC:Yes
Me:Who is a Premier Co-ordinator on extension 1234
HSBC:Yes
Me:Excellent.That's who I want...
*silence*
Me:Hello?
HSBC:Yes.I don't understand what it is you're wanting me to do.What is it you want from me?
Me:I've given you the name of the person and the number they are on.I want you to transfer me through to them.It shouldn't be this difficult.
HSBC:With respect sir,it is difficult if I haven't got any information.
Me:The name is Sue A.The department is Premier Co-ordinator,the number is xxxx. Do you have any number at all in your company for that?
HSBC:There's nothing coming up here on my screen
Me:So,to confirm,you have no number for a Sue A. anywhere in your company-is that what you're telling me?
HSBC:Well I can't say,it hasn't brought it up because I haven't got any information to put in.I do have a number for an S.A. in the system.
Me:Super-can you transfer me through?
HSBC:I can't do that,it might not be the right S.A.
*sound of head banging against wall*.
If they can't be trusted to transfer a telephone call correctly,then why should I trust them with my money without them managing to transfer it off to someone in Gaborone....
Me:Me.Come on,that's obvious
HSBC:Highly Stupid Bank Clot
HSBC:Hello,switchboard,can I help you?
Me:I'd like to be transferred through to Sue A. please
HSBC:Huh?What do you mean?
Me:I'd like to be transferred through to Sue A. please
HSBC:I don't know what you're asking-what do you want me to do?
Me:I'd like to be transferred through to Sue A. please
HSBC:Is that a person,a place,a department?
Me:It's a person.Sue A.
HSBC:I need the full name.
Me:That is the full name-Sue A.
HSBC:I need the full first name.
Me:I don't know that-she just said Sue in the message.
HSBC:Without that,I can't help you.I need the full first name.
Me:I don't know whether she's Suzanne,Susie,Suzette or Sue.She goes by the name of Sue at work. She's the Premier Co-ordinator and she's on extension 1234
HSBC:How do you spell A.?
Me:I'm assuming A-*-*-*-*.Or possibly A-*-*-*-*
HSBC:If you haven't got the correct spelling,I can't help you.
Me:Well,let's try A-*-*-*-*.Do you have anyone called Sue A. of whatever spelling then can you transfer me through-I'm certain there can't be more than one of them.
HSBC:Well,I can't transfer you if I have don't know who you want to talk to.
Me:Right-there is a Sue A.,who is a person.
HSBC:Yes
Me:Who is a Premier Co-ordinator on extension 1234
HSBC:Yes
Me:Excellent.That's who I want...
*silence*
Me:Hello?
HSBC:Yes.I don't understand what it is you're wanting me to do.What is it you want from me?
Me:I've given you the name of the person and the number they are on.I want you to transfer me through to them.It shouldn't be this difficult.
HSBC:With respect sir,it is difficult if I haven't got any information.
Me:The name is Sue A.The department is Premier Co-ordinator,the number is xxxx. Do you have any number at all in your company for that?
HSBC:There's nothing coming up here on my screen
Me:So,to confirm,you have no number for a Sue A. anywhere in your company-is that what you're telling me?
HSBC:Well I can't say,it hasn't brought it up because I haven't got any information to put in.I do have a number for an S.A. in the system.
Me:Super-can you transfer me through?
HSBC:I can't do that,it might not be the right S.A.
*sound of head banging against wall*.
If they can't be trusted to transfer a telephone call correctly,then why should I trust them with my money without them managing to transfer it off to someone in Gaborone....
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