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  • A Few IT Jokes

    Many corporations put the people they respect the most on the highest floors. They often put the IT department in the basement. What does that tell you?

    IT professionals are like offensive linemen. When they do their job, nobody notices. When they screw up, everybody knows who they are.

    Sniffing your coworkers' packets isn't as fun as it sounds.
    This site proves Corey Taylor right. Man really is a "four letter word."

    I'm now using my Deviant Art page to post my humor.

  • #2
    I'd tell you a joke about UDP but you probably wouldn't get it.
    Arp happens!

    Just when I was getting used to yesterday, along came today.

    Comment


    • #3
      Run it by us. ^_^ Some of us would. I'm probably not one of them but we do have a number of tech-heads 'round these parts who would.
      "For a musician, the SNES sound engine is like using Crayola Crayons. Nobuo Uematsu used Crayola Crayons to paint the Sistine Chapel." - Jeremy Jahns (re: "Dancing Mad")
      "The difference between an amateur and a master is that the master has failed way more times." - JoCat
      "Thinking is difficult, therefore let the herd pronounce judgment!" ~ Carl Jung
      "There's burning bridges, and then there's the lake just to fill it with gasoline." - Wiccy, reddit
      "Retail is a cruel master, and could very well be the most educational time of many people's lives, in its own twisted way." - me
      "Love keeps her in the air when she oughta fall down...tell you she's hurtin' 'fore she keens...makes her a home." - Capt. Malcolm Reynolds, "Serenity" (2005)
      Acts of Gord – Read it, Learn it, Love it!
      "Our psychic powers only work if the customer has a mind to read." - me

      Comment


      • #4
        Quoth Cazzi View Post
        I'd tell you a joke about UDP but you probably wouldn't get it.
        About this yellow stain on the back of the server...
        I am not an a**hole. I am a hemorrhoid. I irritate a**holes!
        Procrastination: Forward planning to insure there is something to do tomorrow.
        Derails threads faster than a pocket nuke.

        Comment


        • #5
          Quoth Cazzi View Post
          I'd tell you a joke about UDP but you probably wouldn't get it.
          Heh. Recursion at its best!
          There's no such thing as a stupid question... just stupid people.

          Comment


          • #6
            Quoth dalesys View Post
            About this yellow stain on the back of the server...
            At least there's not a brown out.
            This site proves Corey Taylor right. Man really is a "four letter word."

            I'm now using my Deviant Art page to post my humor.

            Comment


            • #7
              To understand recursion, you must first understand recursion.

              Comment


              • #8
                Q: How many software engineers does it take to change a light bulb?
                A: None. It's a hardware problem.
                Skilled programmers aren't cheap. Cheap programmers aren't skilled.

                Comment


                • #9
                  See? I told you I probably wouldn't get it
                  "For a musician, the SNES sound engine is like using Crayola Crayons. Nobuo Uematsu used Crayola Crayons to paint the Sistine Chapel." - Jeremy Jahns (re: "Dancing Mad")
                  "The difference between an amateur and a master is that the master has failed way more times." - JoCat
                  "Thinking is difficult, therefore let the herd pronounce judgment!" ~ Carl Jung
                  "There's burning bridges, and then there's the lake just to fill it with gasoline." - Wiccy, reddit
                  "Retail is a cruel master, and could very well be the most educational time of many people's lives, in its own twisted way." - me
                  "Love keeps her in the air when she oughta fall down...tell you she's hurtin' 'fore she keens...makes her a home." - Capt. Malcolm Reynolds, "Serenity" (2005)
                  Acts of Gord – Read it, Learn it, Love it!
                  "Our psychic powers only work if the customer has a mind to read." - me

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Quoth catcul View Post
                    Many corporations put the people they respect the most on the highest floors. They often put the IT department in the basement. What does that tell you?
                    That CEOs have their heads in the clouds, while the IT people are grounded in reality?
                    cindybubbles (👧 ❤️ 🎂 )

                    Enter Cindyland here!

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Every computer problem can be solved with a 10 minute fix, but some problems involve a MUCH different number base than others.
                      Any fool can piss on the floor. It takes a talented SC to shit on the ceiling.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Just remember, there are 10 types of people in the world: those who understand binary, and those who don't.
                        Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, you speak with the Fraud department. -- CrazedClerkthe2nd
                        OW! Rolled my eyes too hard, saw my brain. -- Seanette
                        she seems to top me in crazy, and I'm enough crazy for my family. -- Cooper
                        Yes, I am evil. What's your point? -- Jester

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          http://www.poppyfields.net/filks/00259.html

                          Write in C (to the tune of "Let it Be")

                          When I find my code in tons of trouble,
                          Friends and colleagues come to me,
                          Speaking words of wisdom:
                          "Write in C."

                          As the deadline fast approaches,
                          And bugs are all that I can see,
                          Somewhere, someone whispers:
                          "Write in C."

                          Write in C, Write in C,
                          Write in C, oh, Write in C.
                          LOGO's dead and buried,
                          Write in C.

                          I used to write a lot of FORTRAN,
                          For science it worked flawlessly.
                          Try using it for graphics!
                          Write in C.

                          If you've just spent nearly 30 hours
                          Debugging some assembly,
                          Soon you will be glad to
                          Write in C.

                          Write in C, Write in C,
                          Write in C, yeah, Write in C.
                          Only wimps use BASIC.
                          Write in C.

                          Write in C, Write in C
                          Write in C, oh, Write in C.
                          Pascal won't quite cut it.
                          Write in C.

                          Write in C, Write in C,
                          Write in C, yeah, Write in C.
                          Don't even mention COBOL.
                          Write in C.
                          Skilled programmers aren't cheap. Cheap programmers aren't skilled.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Quoth mjr View Post
                            Write in C, Write in C,
                            Write in C, yeah, Write in C.
                            Only wimps use BASIC.
                            Write in C.
                            I'm in this exact situation now. Porting one of my apps, written in BASIC, to the Mac... it's easier to rewrite it in something C-ish than it is to try to get the BASIC working under OSX.
                            Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, you speak with the Fraud department. -- CrazedClerkthe2nd
                            OW! Rolled my eyes too hard, saw my brain. -- Seanette
                            she seems to top me in crazy, and I'm enough crazy for my family. -- Cooper
                            Yes, I am evil. What's your point? -- Jester

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              I've worked on Dells, Gateways, Lenovos, and HPs.

                              Nobody has asked me to look at his Wang.

                              Of course, if you do have an old Wang, you might need a replacement.
                              This site proves Corey Taylor right. Man really is a "four letter word."

                              I'm now using my Deviant Art page to post my humor.

                              Comment

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