Going for the Kitchen Sink defense?

[South Texan]

Ms Defense Attorney:

I know that in a busy law practice it is an easy out just to copy a motion you found that another attorney filed, and then use it for whatever your needs might be (actually a very common and very accepted practice among attorneys) but at least read what you or your staff copied/pieced together before you sign and file it.

You just filed a discovery motion regarding an illegal left turn traffic ticket for which your client signed the promise to appear and drove on. The problem is that you asked for ballistics reports, arrest/criminal records of all witnesses, all documents any expert witness will use to testify, the inventory of your client's car following its impoundment, and all autopsy and toxicology reports associated with the charges. You referred to your client both in the feminine and masculine. Your client's name even changed in one of the paragraphs.

The prosecutor has been laughing all morning. So have the court officers.

Hope the judge does not lose it on the stand as well when this motion gets heard.

[Crossbow]

Oh, wow. What I wouldn't give to be a fly on the wall when that one is read in court.

[seigus]

Will you be in the court when this happens? Will you be able to post a follow up?

[An Haddock]

If they follow up with the Chewbacca Defense (tm) it'll be the greatest motion in history.

[Ghel]

Motion denied on account of the attorney and her staff being incompetent?

[sirwired]

I'm assuming that this attorney is the type that has made no friends in the clerk's office that might call her and give her a head's up she's going to have her a$$ handed to her unless she amends.

And what sort of motion is necessary for a routine minor traffic ticket? Your lawyer shows up on the appointed day, asks for a deal, usually gets it, and we all live Happily Ever After; nobody's gotta file 'nuthin.

[South Texan]

And what sort of motion is necessary for a routine minor traffic ticket?

Asking for a copy of the municipal ordinance that made the left turn illegal at that intersection, a copy of any dashcam video, the officer's notes, etc. are legitimate discovery requests for things the prosecutor probably would have turned over immediately.

I have a feeling the prosecutor will wait until the hearing date to respond to this one.

[Catwoman2965]

Wow. That's just pure incompetence. As a paralegal, I might have been asked to prepare something like this, and would have definitely used something previously done, BUT, would have made sure i did it to fit that case. Not to mention, the ATTORNEY is the one who's name its filed under, so THEY would have and SHOULD have looked it over with a fine tooth comb, before it was filed.

[morgana]

The couple of times I worked (as a temp) in a law office, EVERY document got read by AT LEAST three people before it ever hit the attorney's desk for signature. And most of the attorneys read it through before even picking up the pen.

That's some corn-fed stupid there, ST.

[Argabarga]

You have the right to an attorney, but, we never said they were a terribly good one, now did we?

[Jay 2K Winger]

You have the right to an attorney, but, we never said they were a terribly good one, now did we?

"You have the right to an attorney, if you can't afford an attorney, we will get you the dumbest fucking lawyer on Earth! If you get Johnny Cochran, I'll kill you!"

[wolfie]

That's some corn-fed stupid there, ST.

I'd guess that from the legal definition, it would be a minimum of 51% corn-fed. That lawyer needs to learn that they weren't called before THAT kind of bar.

You have the right to remain stupid. Anything you say can and will get you laughed and/or yelled at in a court of law.

[eltf177]

As my uncle the lawyer used to remind me - judges and prosecutors are human like everybody else. There were some who hated him, for reasons he never discovered.

But this level of dumbness, obnoxiousness and/or entitlement will NOT be overlooked by judges, prosecutors or their staffs. And it will VERY quickly get you on their bad side. Which isn't a good place for a lwayer to be, not to mention their clients...

[Seanette]

Oh, to be a fly on the wall at that hearing.

[wordgirl]

We have a local judge who told a story like this on himself - from the days when he was a horribly overworked public defender. He turned in a discovery motion in a retail larceny case that had been cribbed from a sexual battery case. So it included demands for lots of .... swabs. For various parts.

The prosecutor made sure everyone saw it, of course. 15 years later people were still randomly yanking this guy's chain by giving him swabs. My favorite quote from the story "I'm pretty sure most of them were unused."