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  • Cops live while at In-Law's

    The players:
    Myself
    DG- Drunk Guy
    Woman #1 – DG’s GF
    Woman #2 – Woman #1’s sister
    MIL – My Mother in Law

    I may be in trouble with my MIL. While over at her house on Christmas the people in the house across the street started fighting. I don’t know what the cause was. It came to my attention when I heard a loud bang. When I looked out the window I could see the man that lives over there cursing at someone in a truck and trying to get at them. There was a woman between the truck and him trying to keep him at bay. I later learned that she was his GF and the owner of the house. He started throwing stuff at the truck and banging on it. Out climbed four kids and the GF grabbed a stroller that was near and pulled the baby out. The 4 older kids and the mom with the stroller headed away from the house and down the road. In the meantime another woman that was in the truck climbed out and the DG reached into the truck and snatched a car seat out and threw it. It turns out the other woman was the sister of the first woman. Initially she started to head down the road but then turned around and came back. All the while the DG was screaming and cursing at the top of his lungs. Second woman was on her cell phone the whole time and reversed direction and returned to the house. Initially she tried to get back into the truck when DG started banging on the hood of the truck again. She then went into the house. DG followed her in. I was watching intently and my MIL was going on about how this happens all the time and everyone just ignores it. That they fight like that and then the next day the DG and his GF will be outside hanging all over each other kissing, etc. I informed my MIL that if I saw him put a hand on her I was going to call the police. My MIL told me no and to mind my own business. She has to live across the street from them and she didn’t want any retribution from them if the police were called. Despite that I continued to watch. I did see him grab her arm at one point to attempt to get her out of the house but he quickly let go. It mostly was them screaming at each other and cursing. It was nearing the time for all of us to leave because we were due at another family members house so we went outside to load the presents in the car. My husband and I were standing there when three police cars pulled up. Apparently that was who the woman was on the phone with. One of the officers saw my husband and I standing there and came over and asked what if anything we had seen. I went ahead and told them everything. Upon request I gave them my name and phone number in case they needed to contact me. The officer told me that both of them were drunk and if he could they both would be going to jail that day. I thanked him and wished him a merry Christmas and then we left. My MIL when she saw me talking to the deputy had this look like she didn’t approve.

    What would you have done? Lie and say you saw nothing or tell the truth and risk family wrath.

  • #2
    Just because it happens all the time doesn't mean it's right. And just because someone else doesn't want you to involve the police doesn't mean you're not allowed to if you think it's justified. Certainly there was nothing wrong with you acting as a witness once they did show up.

    By the sound of it, it wasn't just the couple involved any more, but their (extended?) family was being affected too. That had definitely gone beyond the normal limits of marital squabbling. There is something wrong in that family, and hopefully the police being aware of it will give them a nudge in the right direction.

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    • #3
      I wouldn't care if it happened all the time.

      Honestly, I think I'd have done a lot like what you did; paid attention in case he got violent on more than just the truck (I wonder if the sister was drunk, too, since the cop mentioned that both the guy and the girlfriend were - that might explain his banging on the truck) and helped the cops out if they asked.

      ^-.-^
      Faith is about what you do. It's about aspiring to be better and nobler and kinder than you are. It's about making sacrifices for the good of others. - Dresden

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      • #4
        Your MIL is crazy to want to live with that shit all day and all night. It's not going to stop until someone makes it stop.

        You did the right thing.
        They say that God only gives us what we can handle. Apparently, God thinks I'm a bad ass.

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        • #5
          It's not that she "wants" to live with it ... as Sockpuppet said, MIL is afraid of retribution. I can understand that. I once lived on the upper floor of a quadriplex (duplex that was chopped up into two apartments each); tenant on the ground floor was divorced mother of two kids. Idiots on the ground floor next door were the party-hard-and-fight-hard types. Mom hated the racket but was afraid to do anything out of fear for herself and her kids. I was moving anyway so when I came home one night and the usual mayhem was going on, I told her I would call the cops and if the tenants griped at her she was free to tell them it was me. Three cars of cops showed up, but there were no repercussions AFAIK.

          I'd have done the same thing Sockpuppet did. If nothing untoward occurs when they're released, maybe the neighbours -- including MIL -- will stop feeling that they "have" to put up with this. If enough people do that, hopefully the idiots will either straighten up or move.

          Comment


          • #6
            And what if those children had gotten hurt? Could your MIL live with that?

            You did the right thing.
            Life is too short to not eat popcorn.
            Save the Ales!
            Toys for Tots at Rooster's Cafe

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            • #7
              I've called the cops when my neighbors were fighting. I don't want to live near that crap. I moved across the city to get away from stupidity like that and I won't put up with it. Your MIL shouldn't either.

              My idiot neighbors almost had a fight with some friends on Christmas but it was just a lot of drunken yelling. Picture three guys in their 20's staggering around in the street and calling each other "bitch." The neighbor told his friends to leave his house and one guy kept saying "You'll regret this." I almost expected to see him twirling the ends of a handlebar mustache like some cartoon villain. It was ridiculous, but if it had come to punching each other out and smashing things I would have called the cops.
              When you start at zero, everything's progress.

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              • #8
                No doubt you did the right thing.

                Your MIL is full of shit . . . if it's happening in FRONT OF YOU, that makes it YOUR business.
                Human Resources - the adult version of "I'm telling Mom." - Agent Anthony "Tony" DiNozzo (NCIS)

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                • #9
                  Kudos. You did the right thing. Too many people 'don't want to get involved' and that's when the really bad stuff happens.
                  "If anyone wants this old box containing the broken bits of my former faith in humanity, I'll take your best offer now. You may be able to salvage a few of em' for parts..... " - Quote by Argabarga

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Your story reminded me of this recent thread. Read the OP, then flip to page 2 and read the OP's update a few posts down.

                    I never replied to that thread, but Rainman's story and actions really touched me. I hope that if I ever find myself in a similar situation, I can be as courageous as him and you.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Quoth MaggieTheCat View Post
                      Your story reminded me of this recent thread. Read the OP, then flip to page 2 and read the OP's update a few posts down.

                      I never replied to that thread, but Rainman's story and actions really touched me. I hope that if I ever find myself in a similar situation, I can be as courageous as him and you.
                      Ditto this.

                      Reminds me of a second incident ... I was living in (another) apartment building and one night all hell broke loose next door. I heard the guy screaming, "I'M GONNA KILL YOU!!!" and sounds like furniture (or possibly a person ...) being bounced off the walls. I called the police but was so rattled I couldn't remember the security code to let them in, LOL, so I think they called the super.

                      A day or so later the wife, whom I'd not even had a nodding acquaintance with, met me in the hall and said, "Thank you."



                      I hope she drew a line in concrete with him regarding his behaviour -- IF she took him back at all.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Quoth Pixilated View Post
                        It's not that she "wants" to live with it ... as Sockpuppet said, MIL is afraid of retribution.
                        That's why the "Chuck and Diane" situation next-door to my parents went on as long as it did. We all knew they were beating each other (and the kids too ) up every night. Problem was, that the cops were called...but as long as Diane didn't press charges, nothing changed. Chuck would get put in the back of a squad car, dumped in the drunk tank, and would be home the next day. Lather, rinse, repeat.

                        Other than that, everyone was reluctant to call family services. They were afraid of Chuck...and what he might do. Chuck usually got violent when he was drunk. After seeing the damage inside that house--holes in walls, smashed furniture, doors kicked-in, etc. I can understand that.
                        Aerodynamics are for people who can't build engines. --Enzo Ferrari

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