Well, we know people too!!

[Hon'ya-chan]

So another day, another customer asks for the bathroom. Now, County Codes don't explicitly state that we should install one, and the nearest one is like a good 1-2 minute walk max in one of the anchor stores.

Unexpectedly, one lone person has to show her "pull" on such matters.

BL: Why don't you have bathrooms? You're required to have them!!
Me: County Building Codes says it's not required. Only if it's a certain square footage, which we don't meet by......
BL: No, your required to have them, I know people in the Health Department!!
Co-Worker: *Listening off to the side* Oh, who in the Health Department?
BL: *studders* Um....(Name), in Public Health Services.
Co-Worker: Funny, unless my Uncle didn't tell the family he was retiring, he still heads that section.
BL: Erm....I know people at the Building Department!!!
AM: *walking up* Which ones?
BL: *now becoming flustered and angry* I just know people!!
AM: Name the head of Approvals Board then.
BL: .....I don't have to know them!!
AM: Oh, you need to know them to get buildings approved in this place, now, who's the head of the Approvals Board? Or anyone of the Approvals Board?
BL: ....I only know the Building Inspector!!
AM: Theirs 5 of them. Name one.
*awkward silence*
Me: Like I told you, out the door, and walk down till you see (Anchor Store).

Co-Worker has a mom that works at the Health Department as Head of Food Inspectors as well as Uncle in PHS, while AM has several family members littered in the County Government, from Public Works to Deputy Mayor.

[Bright_Star]

Funny how when they say they know so & so & they're called on it then they can't name so & so.

[Amina516]

Nicely Pwned....

[corporateslave]

Nicely Pwned....

YES! That was total PWNAGE

[Grumpy]

very, very nice!

[fireheart]

Can I work for you?

[SG15Z]

Awesome pwnge!!!!

[Becks]

Priceless. *wipes a happy tear from her eye*

[taxguykarl]

Raise...Call...Win.

[Jester]

I deal with such stuff often, due the owner of my bar being a big name in [Northeastern U.S. City], and people from [Northeastern U.S. City] always trying to drop his name with us to get discounts or freebies. See, many of them have probably met him, and he is one of those people that when you meet him, it is not hard to imagine that he is now a good friend, because he is that energetic, enthusiastic, positive, and friendly. But one of the first things Owner told staff at The Bar when he opened it was that anyone who dropped his name was NOT one of his friends, as they would never do that.

Fast forward to last week, when several rowdy, heavy-drinking folks from [Northeastern U.S. City] were in The Bar. One of them kept insisting on dropping Owner's name.

DOUCHEBAG: "Jester, I think Owner wants us to have the next round free."
JESTER: "Sit down, Matt. Drink your drink."
DOUCHEBAG: "Dude, my dad is good friends with Owner. I'm sure he would want to buy us a drink."
JESTER: "That's great Matt."
DOUCHEBAG: "Call Owner, ask him yourself."
JESTER: "Matt, Owner is a busy man. He has better things to do. You know, like run all his businesses."
DOUCHEBAG: "I'm telling you, Owner loves us!"
JESTER: "Let me tell you something, Matt. The first thing Owner told us when he opened this place was that anyone who drops his name is not one of his good friends. So sit down and drink your drink, my friend."
DOUCHEBAG: "Do you know who I am, Jester?"
JESTER: "Nope. Do you know who I am?"
DOUCHEBAG: "Who are you?"
JESTER: "I'm the guy controlling your alcohol."
DOUCHEBAG: "Very funny. I'll tell Owner you were a smartass to me."
JESTER: "That's why he pays me!"
DOUCHEBAG: "So you're not going to call him?"
JESTER: "Dude, I'm kind of busy here getting people drinks. Of course I'm not going to call him. You know him so well, YOU call him!"
DOUCHEBAG: "I will."

Right. Sure you will pal. Uh huh. Whatever. At this point, my coworker walks up, as the group had ordered a round of tequila shots. I should point out that the group was mostly men, and that my coworker is one hell of a hot chick, and she continued the abuse of the group...

COWORKER: "So, you ladies want salt and lime with your shots?"

And so it went. It helps that our Owner gave us that directive, that our management backs us in most instances, and that we are able to be smartasses to people. I know that in retail you don't always have that option, but hey, that is merely one reason I have never worked in retail.

And no, Douchebag Matt never called Owner. Why? Because they weren't close friends, his dad wasn't close friends with the Owner, Matt didn't have Owner's number, and all of that was pretty obvious from the beginning.

And that is not atypical of the kind of stuff you deal with when a guy who is very famous in at least one city is the guy who owns your bar. It can be entertaining and amusing....it can also be very, very annoying.

[protege]

Hehe now that was awesome

Reminds me of the time at the bank in my grandmother's town. At the time, I was going to school down there, and was thinking of setting up an account. Mainly, so if I needed cash, I didn't have to drive home. Anyway, as I'm trying to ask the bank teller, she wasn't being very nice or cooperative. It's not like it was rocket science, just whether not my ATM card would work there.

Rather than deal with her, we (my father was with me) remembered that one of Grandma's friends worked there. Keep in mind that we've known him for years, and he's pretty high up. As soon as he got off the phone, we went over there to chat. He asked how Grandma was doing (this was after her serious auto accident), set up the account no problem. Needless to say, he was a bit pissed when he heard about the teller's attitude.

As I was leaving, I couldn't help but face her, and she had a look (as in "oh shit, they know someone *many* levels above me!") Hehe it was great!

Sorry, but you don't do things like that in a small town. Many people, especially those who have lived there for decades, are 'connected' and will take care of their own. In other words, my late grandfather was a nice guy. He'd literally give you the shirt off his back. As such, everyone knew and respected him.

[Gabrielle Proctor]

Awesome story! Jester's was really funny too.

[Jester]

Protege, that reminds me of my MTV story, which I think I have told here before.

Basically, MTV was filming down here, and they had rented out an entire outdoor bar, paying the owners a sizable fee for using it.

While this all was going on, I was hanging out with a friend on the corner by said outdoor bar, having a conversations. One of MTV's "rent-a-monkey" security guards came up to us and told us we would have to leave.

JESTER: "What are you talking about?"
MONKEY: "MTV is filming. You have to move along."
JESTER: "Yes, they are filming IN the bar. We are ON a public street. So go away."
MONKEY: "Seriously, I'm just doing my job. You guys have to go."
JESTER: "I know you're trying to do your job, but while MTV paid a large amount to the owner of that bar, we are not IN that bar, we are out HERE on a PUBLIC street, and as far as I know, MTV has not paid squat for the rights to this PUBLIC area. So leave us alone and go away."
MONKEY: "Don't make me get the cops."
JESTER: "Dude, you do whatever you think you have to do."

So Monkey goes off and gets a cop. Poor Monkey....his day was not about to get better. Which he found out when he and the cop walked up......

COP: "Magic Man! How's it going?"
JESTER: "Great, Donnie! How's Tiffany? How's little DJ?"
MONKEY: (looking back and forth between me and the cop)
COP: "What seems to be the problem here?"
JESTER: "Don't ask me. Ask this guy. He's the one giving me grief."
COP: (very gravely to Monkey) "What IS the problem here, sir?"
MONKEY: "Er, um, er...."

See, I didn't know as many cops back then as I do now, but he chose the one cop that knew me by name, as he and his wife and infant child were regulars at the restaurant I worked at.

[HawaiianShirts]

So another day, another customer asks for the bathroom. Now, County Codes don't explicitly state that we should install one, and the nearest one is like a good 1-2 minute walk max in one of the anchor stores.

Unexpectedly, one lone person has to show her "pull" on such matters.

BL: Why don't you have bathrooms? You're required to have them!!

What I don't understand is why this woman thought she had to argue about it. If she's needing to find a bathroom so badly, why doesn't she just shut up and start walking to where one is!

I can sometimes understand customers arguing about a store or company policy as it might relate to their situation. If you make a good case, a manager just might be willing to bend a return policy for you or something like that. But why argue that the store should have a bathroom in an urgent situation like that? It's not like someone can just build a bathroom because the customer thinks the store should have one, no matter who the customer knows.

These people just don't think with real logic or sense. I have to learn to accept that.

[Argabarga]

People who namedrop are trying desperately to get perks, the people who already qualify for perks, don't need to namedrop.