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At least, I hope to god this customer had brain damage or alzheimers. If not, he was just a dick of collosal proportions.
Now, a bit of background. My department is inward facing, meaning we cater to dealers and techs. Unfortunately dealers must give our number to customers in case they need to make a change to their dealer orders. However, dealers will also give our number to any Tom, Dick and Harry who wanders into the store and wants to know their bill total. Drives us nuts and leads to a lot of transfers, but we are supposed to help the customers if we have the skills. As a former moving agent, I have a lot of skills. I don't mind too much since customers are okay in small doses, but sometimes...
Me: She Who Must be Obeyed
SC: Who else?
Me: This is [Big Company], Aria speaking. How can I help you today?
SC: I need to change my address!
Me: *processes* ...Are you a tech?
SC: No, I have an account with you! I'm [name redatected] my phone number is ***-****
Me: *internal sigh* Okay sir. *pulls up the account* So what can I do for you today?
SC: I need to change my billing address! They always send it to 30F! It should be F30!
Me: Hmm. *quickly checks our tools and sees that for our purposes, the address is 30F. But our purposes are unrelated to billing* OK. So you want it to be suite F30 instead of -
SC: Not suite! It's an apartment!
Me: *internal sigh again... that was just how I phrased things. But it's way too much trouble to explain* Apartment then... you want it to be apartment F30 instead -
SC: Not suite!
Me: of 30F.
SC: The billing address is F30, [Street], [City], [Phoenetic postal code]
Me: *eyetwitch* Yes sir I've already -
SC: F30 [Street] [City] [Phoenetic postal code]. F30 [Street] -
Me:
Sir, we've done this already -
SC: [City] [Phoenetic Postal Code]. F30 [Street] [City]
Me:
*interrupts sharply* Sir, if you keep repeating that I'm going to have to -
SC: [Phoenetic postal code] And it's APARTMENT!
Me: Yes, sir. Is there anything else I can do for you today?
SC: Repeat it back to me!
Me:
F30 [Street] [City] [Phoenetic postal code] and I am letting you go now sir. *click*
Oh. My. God. I wanted to kill him. He repeated it about five times. I swear I felt like my brains were melting. I had to take a breather to cool down. I thought that was the end of it though... until 3 minutes before my shift ends. And we are open LATE!
Me: Hi this is [Big Company] Aria speaking how can I help you?
SC: They keep changing my number... *mumble mumble*
Me: ?? Um, how can I help you?
SC: They keep changing it from F30 to 30F!
Me: *OMGWTFBBQAUGH* Sir, we have done this already. Everything is fine.
SC: But is it F30? The bills won't reach me!
Me: Sir, we did this earlier and I will not do it again. Everything is fine. I changed it for you. Is there anything else I can do for you?
SC: *mumbles* No?
Me: *click*
GAH!
Now, a bit of background. My department is inward facing, meaning we cater to dealers and techs. Unfortunately dealers must give our number to customers in case they need to make a change to their dealer orders. However, dealers will also give our number to any Tom, Dick and Harry who wanders into the store and wants to know their bill total. Drives us nuts and leads to a lot of transfers, but we are supposed to help the customers if we have the skills. As a former moving agent, I have a lot of skills. I don't mind too much since customers are okay in small doses, but sometimes...
Me: She Who Must be Obeyed
SC: Who else?
Me: This is [Big Company], Aria speaking. How can I help you today?
SC: I need to change my address!
Me: *processes* ...Are you a tech?
SC: No, I have an account with you! I'm [name redatected] my phone number is ***-****
Me: *internal sigh* Okay sir. *pulls up the account* So what can I do for you today?
SC: I need to change my billing address! They always send it to 30F! It should be F30!
Me: Hmm. *quickly checks our tools and sees that for our purposes, the address is 30F. But our purposes are unrelated to billing* OK. So you want it to be suite F30 instead of -
SC: Not suite! It's an apartment!
Me: *internal sigh again... that was just how I phrased things. But it's way too much trouble to explain* Apartment then... you want it to be apartment F30 instead -
SC: Not suite!
Me: of 30F.
SC: The billing address is F30, [Street], [City], [Phoenetic postal code]
Me: *eyetwitch* Yes sir I've already -
SC: F30 [Street] [City] [Phoenetic postal code]. F30 [Street] -
Me:
Sir, we've done this already -SC: [City] [Phoenetic Postal Code]. F30 [Street] [City]
Me:
*interrupts sharply* Sir, if you keep repeating that I'm going to have to -SC: [Phoenetic postal code] And it's APARTMENT!
Me: Yes, sir. Is there anything else I can do for you today?
SC: Repeat it back to me!
Me:
F30 [Street] [City] [Phoenetic postal code] and I am letting you go now sir. *click*Oh. My. God. I wanted to kill him. He repeated it about five times. I swear I felt like my brains were melting. I had to take a breather to cool down. I thought that was the end of it though... until 3 minutes before my shift ends. And we are open LATE!
Me: Hi this is [Big Company] Aria speaking how can I help you?
SC: They keep changing my number... *mumble mumble*
Me: ?? Um, how can I help you?
SC: They keep changing it from F30 to 30F!
Me: *OMGWTFBBQAUGH* Sir, we have done this already. Everything is fine.
SC: But is it F30? The bills won't reach me!
Me:
Sir, we did this earlier and I will not do it again. Everything is fine. I changed it for you. Is there anything else I can do for you?SC: *mumbles* No?
Me: *click*
GAH!
Although it actually went much better this time... he was acting dicky at first but I got him calmed down, and it helped that he was actually calling about a real problem. And during the call he actually told me it IS brain damage. 
He has no short term memory. That explains a lot...
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