Politicals.

[the_std]

I was working as a receptionist for a government justice department. I just answered the phones and dealt with mail/couriers, but, most days, that was enough.

And, of course, it was right before lunch when I got this guy.

Me: "Department of Justice, bonjour!"
SC: "I want to talk to someone!"
Me: "Well, sir, I'm someone. How can I help you?"
SC: "You don't sound important. I have a complaint!"
Me: "Alright, and can I ask your name?"
SC: "Buttpancake Doucheface."
Me: "What can I do for you, Mr. Doucheface?"
SC: "Your justice system is screwed up! Nothing works! I was treated like a common criminal when I was just an ordinary human being! Blah blah blah, going to the public, blah blah blah, end of society as we know it, blah blah blah, corrupt officials... And I will lead a revolution, and then I will OWN you!"
Me: "Okay."
SC: "I... What?"
Me: "I have registered your complaint, sir."
SC: "... What? But... You don't have anything to say?"
Me: "Not really, sir. I'll pass your message along to my supervisor and someone will get back to you."
SC: "... Oh. Okay... Well, thanks, I guess..."
Me: "Have a great day, sir."

I swear, nothing takes the wind out of their sales like not giving a good god-damn about their babbling. But it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside!

[karath]

Ha! Great success! Great job with deflating the guy like that, but i have to ask; what the hell was he trying to accomplish? Just calling up a random bureaucrat and ranting about the government....some people!

[the_std]

That's what I thought. I didn't talk to many members of the public in that job, mostly just lawyers and police officers, so when I did get some random person, they were usually whackos looking for a place to put down a soapbox.

We actually got a letter full of "you hated the Nazis, you bigoted jerks", "what did people who participate in genocide ever do to you?" and, my personal favourite, "for every Jewish skull you saved, I shall break ten of yours!" The freakiest part was they had my boss' direct mailing address, office number and all. The police were called about that one.

[AdminAssistant]

Buttpancake.
*snicker*

[Imogene]

"you hated the Nazis, you bigoted jerks"

Um, call me crazy, but I think most of the world hated the Nazis, once we realized what they were up to...

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

We actually got a letter full of "you hated the Nazis, you bigoted jerks", "what did people who participate in genocide ever do to you?" and, my personal favourite, "for every Jewish skull you saved, I shall break ten of yours!" The freakiest part was they had my boss' direct mailing address, office number and all. The police were called about that one.

And a "sieg heil!" to your letter writer to.

Or a heil (raspberry)

[edible_hat]

"you hated the Nazis, you bigoted jerks"

I bet that one began "Dear Kettle" and ended "Yours Sincerely, Pot. PS You are black"

[Andara Bledin]

And a "sieg heil!" to your letter writer to.

Or a heil (raspberry)

"right in the fuhrer's face"

^-.-^

[walking with scissors]

"what did people who participate in genocide ever do to you?"

I'm pretty sure this is the funniest thing I have ever heard.

And the way you shut Monsieur Doucheface so thoroughly up was Absolutely Perfect.