I have a cousin who used to work in a pizza place, and here are a couple of his stories:
Cuz=Cousin
SC=The Usual
Pizza Is Important
SC is in the store waiting for his pizza on a very busy Saturday night. Cuz has told him it will be 15 minutes. After about 10 minutes, the following ensues:
SC: How much longer is this going to take?
Cuz: I'd say maybe five more minutes.
SC: Why?
Cuz: Well, you ordered about 10 minutes ago, and we're running about 15 minutes for all orders right now, so that leaves about five minutes.
SC: I can't wait that long!
Cuz: I'm sorry, but your pizza is in the oven right now, so all we can really do is allow it to finish cooking.
SC: This is outrageous! (Proceeds to have a bit whiny fit in the lobby full of other customers.)
Cuz: SIR!!! If this pizza means THIS MUCH to you in your life right now, then I am TRULY sorry!!!
All the other customers got the joke and started applauding because they were pretty sick of the guy too.
The Size Of A Pizza
This one happened over the phone.
SC: Yes, I'd like to know what size pizzas you have.
(This place didn't go by S, M, L - instead it was by inches.)
Cuz: We have a 14-inch, a 16-inch, and an 18-inch.
SC: Oh, OK. How big is your 16-inch?
Cuz: (stifles laughter) I can find out for you, please hold.
(Puts phone on hold and has a nice big laugh with all his co-workers.)
Cuz: (back on phone) Sir? My manager and I have successfully determined that a 16-inch pizza is approximately 16 inches.
Cuz=Cousin
SC=The Usual
Pizza Is Important
SC is in the store waiting for his pizza on a very busy Saturday night. Cuz has told him it will be 15 minutes. After about 10 minutes, the following ensues:
SC: How much longer is this going to take?
Cuz: I'd say maybe five more minutes.
SC: Why?
Cuz: Well, you ordered about 10 minutes ago, and we're running about 15 minutes for all orders right now, so that leaves about five minutes.
SC: I can't wait that long!
Cuz: I'm sorry, but your pizza is in the oven right now, so all we can really do is allow it to finish cooking.
SC: This is outrageous! (Proceeds to have a bit whiny fit in the lobby full of other customers.)
Cuz: SIR!!! If this pizza means THIS MUCH to you in your life right now, then I am TRULY sorry!!!
All the other customers got the joke and started applauding because they were pretty sick of the guy too.
The Size Of A Pizza
This one happened over the phone.
SC: Yes, I'd like to know what size pizzas you have.
(This place didn't go by S, M, L - instead it was by inches.)
Cuz: We have a 14-inch, a 16-inch, and an 18-inch.
SC: Oh, OK. How big is your 16-inch?
Cuz: (stifles laughter) I can find out for you, please hold.
(Puts phone on hold and has a nice big laugh with all his co-workers.)
Cuz: (back on phone) Sir? My manager and I have successfully determined that a 16-inch pizza is approximately 16 inches.
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