Our pizza place stops delivery an hour before we close. Tonight, as always, I got numerous calls for delivery after the cut off time. It used to astound me how many people heard the option of "take out" as "delivery." Tonight's slew of attention deprived insomniacs got me thinking of some of the other fun phone conversations over the years.
[B]Not paying attention[B]
Me: Would you like the thin crust or the thick crust for your pizza?
Response: thin thick crust please
Me: Would you like thin crust or the thick crust for your pizza?
Response: Yes, crust.
Just not Listening
Me: Can i get your phone number please?
Response: Yeah, i'd like a large combo blahbittyblahblahblah and i'll be there in twenty minutes, thanks bye (click)
CW (coworker): Ok sir, are you on the east or the west side of the highway so we know which of our two stores delivers to your area.
CC (clueless customer): I dunno.
CW:Ok, are you on the side of the highway with *landmark on east side* or with *landmark on west side*?
CC: I dunno.
CW: Ok sir, does the sun come up or go down on your side of the highway?
Not taking no for an answer
Me: Thank you for calling *Pizza place*, I'm sorry, we're closed.
Response: awww, c'mon, I'll give all you guys a BJ if you make me a pizza.
Me: I'm sorry miss, but you've just devalued that particular currency into complete worthlessness (not really, but was thinking it)