Sometimes I'm not magic

[stitchwitch]

bhskittykatt, you really should fix the intermittent defects in your magic, and get on that.

She needs more friendship. (sorry I resisted for as long as I could.)

[bhskittykatt]

bhskittykatt,, when your done fixing the cell phone towers could you also make it stop raining!

We all tried to combine our magical powers on that one. Trust me, we tried to do the anti-rain dance. It was simply too much water. (And we don't have a portco right now, either, so the guests just loved it.) Seriously, the weather this weekend is a f**king joke.

[Kit-Ginevra]

In my mind,you're all in nice white tops in a giant natural wet t-shirt competition

This is why my mind has a little sign outside.Not suitable for those under 18 or of an easily-offended nature

[manybellsdown]

Hahaha, as a Night Auditor, my eye lasers would have roasted you guys on the spot

LOL I hate it when Day shift leaves me arts and crafts to complete. Of course, part of the issue is that day shift seems to think that I sit around doing nothing most of the time, so don't think its a problem to leave huge projects for me (and then get assy about it when I didn't have time to do their work because I was night auditing instead).

I was checking into a hotel late one evening when something behind the desk caught my eye.

"Is ... is that a Razer Naga mouse?"

*night guy's deer in the headlights look* "Uh... yes?"

"What're you playing?"

"..... SWTOR."

"Good game."

So I know of at least one night motel guy that's not TOO busy on his shift.

[Ashaela]

It's the "What are you going to do about it" that really gets to me.... Possible options include:

Wrap the phone in aluminum foil.

Shake a wooden rattle at it and mumble under your breath.

Sit the phone down for a long discussion about drop bears, snipes and other wild dangers it might encounter while roaming Canada.

Baptize it in Holy Water.

[ADeMartino]

It's the "What are you going to do about it" that really gets to me.... Possible options include:

Wrap the phone in aluminum foil.

Shake a wooden rattle at it and mumble under your breath.

Sit the phone down for a long discussion about drop bears, snipes and other wild dangers it might encounter while roaming Canada.

Baptize it in Holy Water.

From an old (humorous) electronics troubleshooting guide:

1. Approach the ailing device in a confident manner. This will give the device the mistaken idea that you know something. It will also impress anyone who happens to be looking, and if the instrument should suddenly start working you will be credited with its repair. Should this fail, proceed to step 2.

2. Wave the service manual at the device . This will make the device assume that you are at least familiar with the source of knowledge. Should this fail, proceed to step 3.

3. In a forceful manner, recite Ohm's Law to the device . (Caution: BEFORE TAKING THIS STEP, REFER TO A HANDBOOK TO BE SURE OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE OF OHM'S LAW.) This will prove to the device that you do know something. This is a drastic step and should only be taken if the first two steps fail. If this step fails, proceed to step 4.

4. Jar the device slightly. This may take anything from a six to eight foot drop, preferably on a concrete floor. However, you must be careful with this step because, while jarring in the approved method of repair, you must not mar the floor. Again, this is a very drastic step. If it should fail, proceed to step 5.

5. Brandish a large screwdriver in a menacing manner. This will frighten the device and demonstrates the deadly "SHORT CIRCUIT" technique. If this step fails, proceed to step 6.

6. Add a tube...even if the device is solid state. This will prove to the device that you are familiar with the design of the device . Also, this will increase your advantage and confuse the instrument. If this step fails, proceed to the most drastic and dangerous step of all, step 7. It is very seldom used and is the last resort if all else fails.

7. Think...!? Last resort if all else fails.

Think the customer would be happy with my repair technique? I'd love to see the look on his/her face....

[AccountingDrone]

You forgot the Prayer to St Vidicon of the Cathode ...

[Jay 2K Winger]

You forgot the Prayer to St Vidicon of the Cathode ...

Once again, I misread that as St Vicodin...

[bhskittykatt]

Once again, I misread that as St Vicodin...

If St. Vidicon can't fix it, then maybe St. Vicodin can give them a chill pill.

[DGoddessChardonnay]

Everybody knows "If you build it, they will come."

Right?

Yeah, 'cause like Kevin Costner said so in "Field of Dreams" so it must be true, right?

SC's are so cute when they think everything's like Hollywood . . . NOT.

[ADeMartino]

If St. Vidicon can't fix it, then maybe St. Vicodin can give them a chill pill.

St. Vicodin or Prince Valium.

[thatcrazyredhead]

St. Vicodin or Prince Valium.

Hooray!!!

We all tried to combine our magical powers on that one. Trust me, we tried to do the anti-rain dance. It was simply too much water. (And we don't have a portco right now, either, so the guests just loved it.) Seriously, the weather this weekend is a f**king joke.

When someone washes their car around here, we call it the "Arizona rain dance," because Murphy's Law very clearly states that if you wash your car, it will rain. I'm not sure what you'd do for an anti-rain dance. Mud-bogging?

[wolfie]

When someone washes their car around here, we call it the "Arizona rain dance," because Murphy's Law very clearly states that if you wash your car, it will rain. I'm not sure what you'd do for an anti-rain dance. Mud-bogging?

Put down sod for a new lawn when your automatic sprinkler system is out-of-service due to a part being on back order?