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Crotchety Lady vs Dirty Hick Lady

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  • Crotchety Lady vs Dirty Hick Lady

    This happened a few months back, but I just remembered it. It's a shorty, but I found it pretty hilarious.

    I was standing in line to buy clothes at a JTMaxx. There was only one checker up front and a large line started forming. To be fair, it seemed like everyone in the store was ready to check out, so it caught the cashier by surprise. A second cashier was called up after a minute or two. It wasn't too long.

    Next to the cashier booths is the jewelery and return desk. The sign above the desk clearly says "RETURNS". A lady is standing at the counter, giving nasty looks at the very busy cashier. She's sighing, *tsk*ing, tapping her long, ugly fake nails on the glass counter. A second line opens, and the people behind me move to the newly opened register. The lady FLIPS at this.

    Lady: EXCUSE ME!!!11!!

    *silence* No one looks at her. Cashiers are busy ringing people up.

    Lady: HELLO, I WAS HERE FIRST!1!!
    Cashier: *looks over to lady at return counter* Are you making a return?
    Lady: NO! I need to buy these clothes!!
    Cashier: You'll have to get in one of the lines to purchase clothes. That's the return counter.
    Lady:*splutters* THOSE LINES ARE LOOONG! (this lady could be heard in the back of the store, I swear)
    Cashier: I'm sorry, but that is the return counter.
    Lady: I've been standing here for 10 minutes! Nobody told me that! (except for the big red sign hanging in front of your face)

    Cashier says nothing. I wouldn't have either, because I'd be busy biting my tongue off.

    Lady: (even louder) I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO WAIT IN LINE!!
    Cue Hick Lady. I could see her getting in bar brawls. Lady is big and has an attitude.
    HL: *laughs* Deal, sweetie! We're all waiting!
    Lady: *huffspluttertsk* This is VERY unreasonable! I'm NOT happy about this!

    (keep in mind, she's STILL standing at the return counter. Several other people have joined the que.)

    HL: Think you're too good to get in line like the rest of us? Think you're better and more important than everyone else in this store?
    Lady: *more huffing and spluttering and "Well I never's"*

    By this time, I was at the register paying. The poor cashier looked pissed off. I looked her in the eye and said "I hope you have a better day" then left. As I was leaving, hick lady and crotchety lady's faces were getting closer and closer to each other, each of them yelling louder and louder. I was laughing hysterically out to my car. The lady looked like my elementary school English teacher.

  • #2
    I love when people form their own "line" and wonder why they don't get served.

    It's the same thing as people at restaurants walking past the "Wait to be seated" sign, sitting at a dirty table, and getting mad that no one comes to help them.
    You really need to see a neurologist. - Wagegoth

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    • #3
      I wish you'd stuck around to see the outcome!
      "Is it hot in here to you? It's very warm, isn't it?"--Nero, probably

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      • #4
        I wonder what makes her so special that she doesn't have to wait in line like all the common people. I know, she's the self-appointed ruler of the small but overpopulated country of Bitchland. She has diplomatic immunity, you know.
        It is a terrible thing to see and have no vision.
        -Helen Keller

        I got this av from Court Records, made by Croik!

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        • #5
          More like she's the president of PMSopolis.
          You really need to see a neurologist. - Wagegoth

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          • #6
            and i bet it never dawned on her...

            the more she argued about how "important impotent" she was with HL... the more time she's spending NOT checking out.

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            • #7
              Oh, the superiority was just oozing from every wrinkled pore of hers. It was infuriatingly obnoxious listening to a 50-something woman whine and splutter at the thought of joining a line. In hindsight, I wish I had stayed long enough to tell both women to grow the fuck up and stop making asses of themselves. It was such an odd situation, the only appropriate response at the time was to laugh in bewielderment and walk out.

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              • #8
                sounds like a customer at my store. She speaks "ghetto talk" when pissed but is very very sweet. She told one customer to "fuck off" and get "get off the poor guy's balls" when the other pissy customer was making a scene. She also told said customer to "back the fuck up" when said customer was getting in her face. I love that woman....she makes me laugh!!
                NEVER underestimate the stupidity of the customer

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