Things I am not allowed to do at work.

[Kit-Ginevra]

I am not allowed to write on the new girl's nametag 'The longer you stand reading this,the more it looks you're staring at my tits'...

[catcul]

When complaining about having to fly from Austin, TX, to Greensboro, NC, through Detroit, MI, I am not allowed to play the "Take him to Detroit" video.

[BrenDAnn]

Not allowed to look at the new hires like they're stupid. Must remember they're new on the job, not stupid....most of them...I hope...

[rapana1]

Not allowed to hit Little Miss Weekend with *either* end of the receipt spike.

Not allowed to simply throw away rolls of fabric I don't like.

Not allowed to take home really cool stuff made thru our in home consult service that's waiting at our store for customer to collect.

Yes, even if the fabric is really awesome.

[drjonah]

Not allowed to walk up to the cashier who is 'not too bright', look her right in the eyes and say 'Are you in there?'

[Teysa]

Not allowed to hide the microphone of rail guides who talk too much. Not allowed to turn the volume way down or steal the batteries either.

[catcul]

When I go to Texas, I must remember the locals don't want to see shorts with cowboy boots.

[Gilhelmi]

1)I am not allowed to shoot Qtips out of the compressed air hose.
2)I am not allowed to shoot Wet Paper Wads out of the compressed air hose.
3)I am not allowed to design, new and better, projectiles to shoot out of the compressed air hose.
4)I am not allowed to discuss my theory on producing a superconducting metal, the advanced safety systems needed, or the legality of obtaining the necessary materials. (yes, pure Mercury is legal to buy in the US. I might succeed, I might blow up a couple of garages, who knows? that is the joy and excitement of science.)
5)I am not allowed to laugh in a villainous manner. People have a hard time telling when I am joking, apparently.

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Load-retraining bars left inside incoming trailers are not "implements of extremely negative reinforcement."

If my co-worker working in the garden center before it opens in the morning happens to see some people pull up and have sex in their car, not allowed to tell him next time he has to tell all of us so we can watch.

But if I ever find myself working in the garden center before it opens in the morning and some people pull up and have sex in their car, you best believe I'm going to tell co-workers to come outside and watch.

[OneMoreTime]

How do you post in the future? There are posts dated 6/19, 6/22, 6/23 and 6/29 for this year!!! Today is the 18th!

[Seanette]

Yes, today is 7/18. It's July.

[Kit-Ginevra]

Yes, today is 7/18 18/7. It's July.

applied-there that looks so much better

[OneMoreTime]

OK, I guess I'm an idiot.

[Seanette]

OK, I guess I'm an idiot.

No worries, everyone has the occasional brain burp.

[OneMoreTime]

Thanks Seanette. That was a brain BELCH!