Prayers/Good wishes/Advice/Booze welcomed

[RootedPhoenix]

*returns to hug Kanalah* <3

[Kanalah]

Update

Okay several things here: We had a "free legal advice" day, so I called up a lawyer and spent some time talking to him. He agrees with me that it's not an ideal situation for anyone involved. Unfortunately I don't have the money to hire a lawyer and get things done.

I have been avoiding talking to my mom, for 2 reasons. First because I was in the middle of graduation t-shirt quilt season, and second because every time I would talk to her she would whine and complain about how bad her life sucks.

I did visit her for Mother's Day. She told me that she's enrolled gma in "day care". It's a respite care for people with Alzheimer's. Gma attends 6 days a week. The reason for mom's change of heart from "I'll never put my mother in a home!" (Ironically she said the opposite to me about my autistic daughter.) was that they went out to gma's favorite fast food place. They used to go at least once a day, if not twice a day. This time they were sitting near a Hispanic family and gma kept loudly saying "How dare they let those raicial-slur-for-a-different-race-entirely in here!" Of course mom was mortified. So gma now spends most of her days watching cartoons and doing arts and crafts. She seems to enjoy it.

Mom is talking about getting a job, now that she has some free time. I told her that maybe she'd like to clean out the cottage first.

Background - mom is a hoarder. She filled up the nice 4bed house we had in the suburbs (my sis lives there now, rent free) then moved in with gma when gpa passed away. They now live in a 3 bedroom retirement cottage that is the same size as my house. It is full of trash and crafting supplies. There is a "goat path" 1 shoe-width wide through the house. Since it is the only exposed carpet in the house, that's where the cats and dog use the bathroom. When gma has to go into full-time care mom will have the rest of that month to move out, which is why I think right now she should focus on cleaning now. It will be even more traumatic to her to clean everything out when we have no time to sort though it and will have to toss everything.