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Wherein I summon the Llama of Drama

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  • Wherein I summon the Llama of Drama

    I accidentally incurred the wrath of my estranged drama llama of a mother. Well, invoked it on my father, actually. How did I do this, you ask? And why is it in Roadkill? Because, dear friends, all of this came about because I was obeying all of the local traffic laws and complained to a local taxi company about one of their drivers who was doing the opposite.

    My commute to work includes what is technically a state route, but is functionally more of a country road. Curvy, no shoulder, blind drives, frequented by: Pedestrians/joggers, dog walkers, collared dogs minus their walkers (a pet peeve of mine), wild animals ranging from crows & squirrels to deer & bears, bicyclists, school buses, and now 'tis the season of the high school cross country team running single file on the side of the road. Oh, and I drive past the school during morning drop off, where you have a pile of buses, parents, and kids in a seething chaotic mass of people & vehicles.

    Needless to say, this can be a very dangerous and volatile mix of potential car accidents in just the space of a few miles.

    On my way to work a few weeks bag, I had a caravan tailgating me. Like, close enough I couldn't see his headlights or grill because he was so close to my back end. I was traveling at the speed limit, and actually slowed down to 5 under for the 2 passing zones. With no oncoming traffic, the jackass behind me still felt the need to keep tailgating rather than passing.

    A couple minutes later, we come drop into the school zone and I slow down for the school zone speed limit. At this point, I can see the driver's side headlight of the caravan. In my sideview mirror, because he is now straddling the double yellow line as we come up on the busy school driveway.

    He drops back behind me, to avoid colliding with a car turning into the school, and then immediately pops out and passes on the double yellow, while we're still in the school zone. I thoughtfully flip him off as he goes past.

    When he drops in front of me, I see that the vehicle belongs to a local taxi company, which well known here for their drivers being utter twatwaffles and driving dangerously. This was pretty egregious even by their lax standards. I got his license # and company vehicle ID # and call it in as soon as I get to work. The supervisor at the taxi company takes my name & contact info. He states he will pull the video from the taxi's dashcam and follow up with the driver 'if the situation exactly matches your description' and will follow up with me if they have questions. I figure that's all I am ever going to hear about it and move on.

    Cue this weekend's call with my dad. I want to note, my dad doesn't live close by - he's not even in the same country. Dad tells me about a strange situation. My estranged drama llama/biomom called him up earlier in the week to scream at him about how he's telling lies to her boyfriend's employer and now the boyfriend has been fired. Dad was suitably confused and spent nearly half an hour trying to talk her down. Eventually she hung up on him and told him to stay out of her business.

    Someone named 'Gerrinson' called in a complaint about him. This last complaint was the one that got him fired. Dad asked if I knew anything about it, since I'm a Gerrinson Jr. and he's Gerrinson Sr. I was like, I've met the dude once - by accident - and that was 7 years ago. I don't know where he works and living with biomom is punishment enough for his stupidity.

    As we talked, the light went off in my head, and I shared my story about the taxi complaint with dad, and we've figured it must have been biomom's boyfriend who was the driver. I apologized to my dad for him getting blasted for something which didn't involve him. Though we both agree, the jackass deserved to be fired. And driving like that when you know your vehicle has a dashcam? Just plain stupid. I guess I know why he's still living with my chiroptera fecal matter loony biomom.

  • #2
    Woooow. This sounds like an episode of a tv show. Most speeders (around here at least) slow down for schools zones, even the really terrible drivers. Cops love to sit in them, fines are crazy high in a school zone and my understanding is that it's harder to fight those tickets in court.
    Replace anger management with stupidity management.

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    • #3
      What are the odds? Still, sounds like it was past time for such a call to be placed against this tickturd, so yay.
      This was one of those times where my mouth says "have a nice day" but my brain says "go step on a Lego". - RegisterAce
      I can't make something magically appear to fulfill all your hopes and dreams. Believe me, if I could I'd be the first person I'd help. - Trixie

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      • #4
        Quoth Gerrinson View Post
        utter twatwaffles
        New band name!

        "Are you ready!? Here they are! The 'Utter Twatwaffles'!"
        Skilled programmers aren't cheap. Cheap programmers aren't skilled.

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        • #5
          Quoth notalwaysright View Post
          Woooow. This sounds like an episode of a tv show. Most speeders (around here at least) slow down for schools zones, even the really terrible drivers. Cops love to sit in them, fines are crazy high in a school zone and my understanding is that it's harder to fight those tickets in court.
          There's an elementary school 4 blocks from where I live, and every time I'm out and about during the morning hours, I see at least one police car there with their lights on.

          Good for the op getting that ass hat taken care of.
          "Life is tough. It's even tougher if you're stupid" Redd Foxx as Al Royal - The Royal Family - Pilot Episode - 1991.

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          • #6
            Steals "chiroptera fecal matter loony" and keeps it as my own!!! That's the best ever!!!

            Oh, and good on you for getting that menace off the road. It's really hard to speed in school zones here, all the other cars are slowed to 5 under the 15 posted limit out of fear. I, personally, will avoid driving past schools whenever possible. And school buses. I HATE getting stuck behind a school bus driving the same route I take to go home. If I see one, I take the longer way home.

            Kids don't understand that people might not see them in time to stop so are always doing unpredictable things.

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            • #7
              Quoth Slave to the Phone View Post
              Steals "chiroptera fecal matter loony" and keeps it as my own!!!
              That is quite awesome....

              Did you know that said chiroptera's wings are actually lengthened finger bones and the webbing between the fingers? Which means that THEY FLY BY THE POWER OF JAZZ HANDS!!!!
              “There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old’s life: The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged.
              One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world.
              The other, of course, involves orcs." -- John Rogers

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              • #8
                Quoth Nunavut Pants View Post
                THEY FLY BY THE POWER OF JAZZ HANDS!!!!
                *dies giggling*

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                • #9
                  No one else has done it yet?

                  It's a small world after all
                  My Guide to Oblivion

                  "I resent the implication that I've gone mad, Sprocket."

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