This board is an interesting thing. It allows us to see into other people's lives in ways we might never be able to. It provides us with the opportunity for friendship and camaraderie beyond those offered by our various geographies. It gives us a chance to seek advice when needed, and offer counsel when asked for. It provides us with a place to seek wisdom from those who have experienced more than we have, or to offer the lessons learned from that we ourselves have experienced. It gives some people a chance to be freer than how they feel they can be in their normal lives. It offers the chance to vent about work, family, friends, and just life in general. It gives us a chance to share things about ourselves with people we've never met and in most cases never will meet.
I have been accused, not undeservedly, of sharing too much of myself on these boards. I make no apologies for that--it is who I am. I am open to people, not just here, but at work with my customers and coworkers, as well as with my friends and loved ones.
Today is March 5, 2011, which is a significant date in my life, its coming has sparked some inner reflection on my part.
There are some things in life I have never experienced, and much that I will never see or know. But I have seen, done, and been through much that was not always that pleasant.
I've dealt with a revolving door of roommates in the past year, and last night found out that that door will continue to turn yet again, as my newest roommate is apparently moving to another place.
I've had my heart broken on multiple occasions, by my ex-fiance, by my first love, by others I've dated.
I've been betrayed by some women, some by cheating, some by stealing, some by lying--at least one did all three and then some.
I've been betrayed by some friends who violated the most basic principles of friendship I hold dear.
I've seen friends die. Some due to others, some by their own hand.
I've watched as my nieces grew, and sometimes made choices that saddened me. One is pregnant. One just got busted in school for pot. One won't talk to me.
I've been treated poorly by various family members, not due to anything I did to them, but because of their own personal makeup or selfishness.
I've watched helplessly the last few months as my stepsister fell into a catatonic coma, and while I believe she is in there fighting to get out, her caregivers have seen no concrete proof that she is making any progress.
I've lived with the knowledge always in the back of my brain that I may inherit a potentially fatal disease that has affected two members of my family, killing one, and causing years of suffering in another. I've also lived with the knowledge that, as the son of someone who was probably bipolar, I live on the border, often exhibiting signs of this two-headed monster.
I've been fired by one employer, mistreated by others, and accused (albeit indirectly) of stealing by yet another.
I've gotten out of shape physically, and my uncanny knack for procrastination has not helped me get back into the shape I want to, and can, be in.
I've watched my friends suffer through various tragedies, some of their own making, some due to the evil and wrongdoings of others.
And 30 years ago, on March 5, 1981, I returned home from school to find out that my father had died.
I have often described my father as the funniest man I've ever met, and without question, he is where I get a large portion of my sense of humor from, though my mother is not without credit in this department.
I only knew him for the first 10 years of my life, much of which I don't remember, and much of which I may have blocked out of my mind--I don't, for example, have any recollection of his nervous breakdown, although I was at an age where I could have remembered such a significant thing. But I do remember a lot about him, some good, some not so good. But the things that stand out above all else in my memory are his sense of humor, is love of life, and is devotion to his family, even when we drove him completely nuts.
Today is March 5, 2011. For many people, the anniversary of the passing of a loved one will bring on sadness and grief. But I learned from my father the greatness of laughter. And I have learned to appreciate over my years the wisdom of the Irish, who do not mourn the passing of the departed, but rather, gather to celebrate the life of their loved one.
Today I could bow my head and feel sorry for myself, for growing up much of my life without my father, for other tragedies I've been through, and for stuff that continues to come at me in life.
I could. But I won't.
Because despite all I have been through, which is not as bad as some but worse than others, I have refused to be bowed, beaten, or broken. I have learned that that which does not kill me not only makes me stronger, but makes me much stronger, and a better person, and wiser. I have never forgotten that I learn something new every day, and even if that lesson is bitter or hard to swallow, it prepares me better for the next experience, good, bad, or neutral. I have had many opportunities in my life to wallow in self-pity, and there have been times where I have done just that. But those times are fewer and further between, as I have made a conscious choice to enjoy my life as much as I can for as long as I can--because I know that I have no idea when it will end.
I don't know what my father would think of me if he were alive today. He would probably agree with some of my choices and disagree with others, just as my mother and stepfather have done. But one thing I am certain of is that he would be proud of the fact that I have made a profession out of making people happy, of making people smile, of making people laugh. Both as a magician and a bartender, I bring joy into people's lives. And for that I say simply: lesson learned, Dad.
But life is not just about learning about one's self, but about helping others. I have spent much time and energy on these boards offering my counsel and advice, and I'd like to think that I have helped some people here in some way, no matter how small.
Continuing in that vein, I would like to offer some more advice today, to all of you. And that is simply to enjoy life. Do not let the bad things in life bog you down. Bad things happen. They happen to you, they happen to your neighbor, they happen to everyone. It's how we react to these things that determine how our lives will be. You can ask why this thing happened to you, and it's a normal thing to wonder. But you can also make a conscious choice to stop wallowing, stop pitying, stop crying, stop whining, and get up off your butt, pull your head out of your ass, and DO something about it. You can be passive and wonder why good things don't happen to you, or you can actively seek out those good things and make them happen. You will still experience failure, loss, and pain. But you will also find that you experience so much more. More joy. More happiness. More laughter. More LIFE.
Today is March 5, 2011. 30 years ago, the funniest man I've ever met, accompanied by his pet giraffe, exited stage left. But I will not let this day be one of grief, but one of celebration. Of laughter. Of love. And of life.
Today is March 5, 2011. Today can be the greatest day of your life. So can tomorrow, and the days that follow. But only one person can make that happen.
Get to it.
I have been accused, not undeservedly, of sharing too much of myself on these boards. I make no apologies for that--it is who I am. I am open to people, not just here, but at work with my customers and coworkers, as well as with my friends and loved ones.
Today is March 5, 2011, which is a significant date in my life, its coming has sparked some inner reflection on my part.
There are some things in life I have never experienced, and much that I will never see or know. But I have seen, done, and been through much that was not always that pleasant.
I've dealt with a revolving door of roommates in the past year, and last night found out that that door will continue to turn yet again, as my newest roommate is apparently moving to another place.
I've had my heart broken on multiple occasions, by my ex-fiance, by my first love, by others I've dated.
I've been betrayed by some women, some by cheating, some by stealing, some by lying--at least one did all three and then some.
I've been betrayed by some friends who violated the most basic principles of friendship I hold dear.
I've seen friends die. Some due to others, some by their own hand.
I've watched as my nieces grew, and sometimes made choices that saddened me. One is pregnant. One just got busted in school for pot. One won't talk to me.
I've been treated poorly by various family members, not due to anything I did to them, but because of their own personal makeup or selfishness.
I've watched helplessly the last few months as my stepsister fell into a catatonic coma, and while I believe she is in there fighting to get out, her caregivers have seen no concrete proof that she is making any progress.
I've lived with the knowledge always in the back of my brain that I may inherit a potentially fatal disease that has affected two members of my family, killing one, and causing years of suffering in another. I've also lived with the knowledge that, as the son of someone who was probably bipolar, I live on the border, often exhibiting signs of this two-headed monster.
I've been fired by one employer, mistreated by others, and accused (albeit indirectly) of stealing by yet another.
I've gotten out of shape physically, and my uncanny knack for procrastination has not helped me get back into the shape I want to, and can, be in.
I've watched my friends suffer through various tragedies, some of their own making, some due to the evil and wrongdoings of others.
And 30 years ago, on March 5, 1981, I returned home from school to find out that my father had died.
I have often described my father as the funniest man I've ever met, and without question, he is where I get a large portion of my sense of humor from, though my mother is not without credit in this department.
I only knew him for the first 10 years of my life, much of which I don't remember, and much of which I may have blocked out of my mind--I don't, for example, have any recollection of his nervous breakdown, although I was at an age where I could have remembered such a significant thing. But I do remember a lot about him, some good, some not so good. But the things that stand out above all else in my memory are his sense of humor, is love of life, and is devotion to his family, even when we drove him completely nuts.
Today is March 5, 2011. For many people, the anniversary of the passing of a loved one will bring on sadness and grief. But I learned from my father the greatness of laughter. And I have learned to appreciate over my years the wisdom of the Irish, who do not mourn the passing of the departed, but rather, gather to celebrate the life of their loved one.
Today I could bow my head and feel sorry for myself, for growing up much of my life without my father, for other tragedies I've been through, and for stuff that continues to come at me in life.
I could. But I won't.
Because despite all I have been through, which is not as bad as some but worse than others, I have refused to be bowed, beaten, or broken. I have learned that that which does not kill me not only makes me stronger, but makes me much stronger, and a better person, and wiser. I have never forgotten that I learn something new every day, and even if that lesson is bitter or hard to swallow, it prepares me better for the next experience, good, bad, or neutral. I have had many opportunities in my life to wallow in self-pity, and there have been times where I have done just that. But those times are fewer and further between, as I have made a conscious choice to enjoy my life as much as I can for as long as I can--because I know that I have no idea when it will end.
I don't know what my father would think of me if he were alive today. He would probably agree with some of my choices and disagree with others, just as my mother and stepfather have done. But one thing I am certain of is that he would be proud of the fact that I have made a profession out of making people happy, of making people smile, of making people laugh. Both as a magician and a bartender, I bring joy into people's lives. And for that I say simply: lesson learned, Dad.
But life is not just about learning about one's self, but about helping others. I have spent much time and energy on these boards offering my counsel and advice, and I'd like to think that I have helped some people here in some way, no matter how small.
Continuing in that vein, I would like to offer some more advice today, to all of you. And that is simply to enjoy life. Do not let the bad things in life bog you down. Bad things happen. They happen to you, they happen to your neighbor, they happen to everyone. It's how we react to these things that determine how our lives will be. You can ask why this thing happened to you, and it's a normal thing to wonder. But you can also make a conscious choice to stop wallowing, stop pitying, stop crying, stop whining, and get up off your butt, pull your head out of your ass, and DO something about it. You can be passive and wonder why good things don't happen to you, or you can actively seek out those good things and make them happen. You will still experience failure, loss, and pain. But you will also find that you experience so much more. More joy. More happiness. More laughter. More LIFE.
Today is March 5, 2011. 30 years ago, the funniest man I've ever met, accompanied by his pet giraffe, exited stage left. But I will not let this day be one of grief, but one of celebration. Of laughter. Of love. And of life.
Today is March 5, 2011. Today can be the greatest day of your life. So can tomorrow, and the days that follow. But only one person can make that happen.
Get to it.
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